Julius Caesar Monologue

15 March, 44 B.C. Lucius had just confirmed ‘tis now the morning, but I cannot tell the difference any longer. I had been at war with myself, having to endure countless of sleepless nights ever since Cassius incited me against Caesar. But, Caesar is mine own friend and benefactor, is he not?. He was the one who granted me amnesty, did he not? He was the one that allowed me to attain such high an office and lead a comfortable life, were he not? Furthermore, Rome is built on honour and staunchness, and if I should betray him, it would be a heinous act. And yet it is not personal; I hold no grudge against his person. I am not doing this for my own good but for the people of this land. My loyalty lies stronger with the citizens, and my responsibility
Even the Gods have spoken through the strange and ominous weather. Of evidence I have none, but is it not better to kill a threat at the breast, then watch it fester out of control, knowing we had the opportunity to cut it short?
To the Gods, I pray that they forgive us for interfering with nature of which they have tediously weaved and for cutting short one’s time. While I may believe in the Stoic philosophy, it was necessary that we take this issue into our own hands.
Although some may claim it to be vile and cowardly, it demands a deal of courage and a sense of righteousness. It was not easy, having to descend my sword against a friend, for my heart did ache for each drop of blood Caesar did spill. And I am neither a cold-hearted person, for he was more than a friend to me, and neither can I imagine the pain he felt when I broke his trust.
However, I may not say the same for the rest; they did seem to have a grudge against Caesar, for reasons unbeknownst. Perhaps they envious or feared for their power should Caesar be crowned. Even I could tell from the way they took pleasure at the drawing of Caesar’s blood, the frustration dissipating after each plunge. Or perhaps I am reading too much; they are, after all, noble
Fie on Mark Antony! That wretched brat deceived us! To think I had a little bit of trust in him. And shame on the citizens, that they be swayed by the hedonistic likes of him. For a moment they were chanting for me, and the next charging after our blood. Fickle, ungrateful fools! ‘Twas my mistake, to be so dismissive of him; he managed to turn the crowd against me though I had the advantage of experience and skill. I have to admit, it was impressive, cunning and manipulative as well. Furthermore, how could I forget about Caesar’s will? It was far from what I could have expected from the likes of him by how he managed to manipulate the plebeians emotions so easily. Fortunately, I have escaped thus far, out of his leathery clutches. However, I fear for Portia; what can a defenseless woman do against such a mob? I should have brought her with me, but for the want of time and the urgency. However, all must die in the end, and should the worst happen, I will but grief only to myself and blame her death on my person.
There are more compelling matters to think of, and I must not divide my mind in such a manner. We will be preparing to fight Octavius and Antony soon. Caesar, the name Octavius inherited, for Julius did state so in his