Leslie Morgan Stein Thesis

“Cray Love” is an autobiography written by Leslie Morgan Stein, recalling her life and her struggles throughout her abusive relationship. Leslie Morgan Stein grows up in Bethesda Washington in the 1980’s, in a rich family. Her father is a busy lawyer, and mother a tragically gorgeous alcoholic. Stein graduates from Harvard, and soon after becomes a journalist for Seventeen Magazine, in New York City. All of this before she met Connor. Stein has many influences in her life that strengthened her, and led to the impact she has on the world today. Her mother’s deep struggle with alcohol and drugs, and her father’s inability to care for her, influenced her, and brought challenges that she had to overcome in order to make the impact that she did. Every day her mother would fight her struggles from depression with a bottle of alcohol, while her father would seclude himself. “On weekdays my father hid at his law office downtown and my mother tossed back rum and cokes at our home in Bethesda.”(Pg.17) As Stein watched her mother struggle; she was influenced to take up these bad habits, in an attempt to numb herself as well. Steins addiction to drugs and alcohol began at the age of twelve, stealing Marlboros from her
fireplace mantel, and finishing off her parent’s martinis when they were not looking. The challenge of overcoming both her and her mothers addiction would be the only way Stein was going to survive, hope was the only way she could survive. Luckily Stein was still a very smart girl school wise, and was accepted to Harvard, where she overcame her addiction. “A woman named Hope took me to my first twelve-step meeting.”(Pg.19) Stein stopped drinking and using drugs cold turkey. This first challenge of survival in a family filled with pain and seclusion gave her proof, that she could overcome anything if she believed. It was on the fifty third street subway when Leslie Morgan Stein met the man who would influence her life dramatically. “The subway felt suddenly empty-accept for the blonde man, who was now touching my elbow. I did not slide away from him into a free seat, as every other person who had lived in New York for 5 seconds would.”(Pg. 13) When Connor awkwardly introduced himself to Stein, she thought of him no more then a strange handsome subway man that she would never see again. After they dated for a brief time, Connor began to influence Steins life, with a wedding ring, which at the time she thought was harmless. Many changes were yet to come though, starting with Connors new job offer, in the backwoods of Vermont. One of Steins biggest challenges was the decision to go with her finance to Vermont, drop her amazing job and beautiful Manhattan apartment, and become a freelance writer. “A voice in my head said: We love New York. I have a terrific job that half of the girls in America would push me off the Brooklyn Bridge to get.”(Pg.118) Stein did not know at the time that this was all part of Connors plan to seclude her, from her life, friends, and family. With their new life money was scarce, and Stein began to notice subtle temperamental outbreaks from Connor. His possessiveness and irritability were sure signs of challenges to come. “What set him off? He was so insecure and jealous-sometimes.”(Pg.129) Connors abuse soon got much worse. Steins biggest challenge during the abuse from Connor was the denial she was in. She felt as if she needed to help him overcome his abusive past, and that he would change over time. Stein was incorrect, as her challenges just became more difficult. Countless times Connor both physically and mentally abused her. One of Steins most life changing and influential moments was her last fight with Connor, after she thought he changed for good because of their short break. An explosion of pent-up anger by Connor gave Stein a near death experience. “My life was this room, this firm mattress, a soft, fading gray-black in front of my eyes.”(Pg.252) After Steins last fight with Connor she was influenced by his outbreaks to put an end to it all.
She had many challenges to get by in order to succeed. One of her biggest challenges was willing herself to leave Connor and dissolve her love for him, for good. From the restraining order, to the divorce court, Stein struggles with her feelings of devastation. When Stein realized the denial she had throughout the relationship, and the clear signs of abuse that were shown, she felt immense embarrassment that she had not left sooner. “Right then I knew, I was done with Connor for good. No matter how sorry I felt for him. No matter how much I still cared.”(Pg.310) Steins greatest challenge, with the greatest impact, was facing what she was scared to admit all
along. All of Steins influences and challenges caused an immense impact on her, and how she impacted the world today. The strength she developed from surviving her childhood impacted her ability to survive her relationship with Connor. Her survival skills developed from her abusive relationship with Connor gave her incredible wisdom and courage. This wisdom is what impacted the world, with books like “Mommy Wars” and “Two Cents on Working Motherhood.” Both credible books filled with knowledge. Yet one of her greatest impacts on the world is her autobiography, which I am writing about, “Crazy Love.” This book impacts millions of readers, just by sharing her story of survival, and giving hope to others in situations similar to Steins.