Martyr Self-Martyrdom

Being a martyr self sacrifices to ensure everyone else within the circle comes first, the martyr acts out of a sense of duty and responsibility to act for the benefit of others excluding themselves. I know quite a few people like this and often I looked to it as a strength but after this lesson I now beg to differ, as my eyes were opened they are indeed unhappy within and quite unstable in their decision making. They measure their success in others happiness often because of what they have done for that person. This on down the line will create unhealthy problems and unhealthy people.
Self-martyrdom causes guilt, resentment and dysfunctional relationships. Often they believe that they are owed for sacrificing time etc into a relationship, or
takes personal responsibility if the person fails to move on or change in some way or another. They often feel let down by others when they fail to get the same treatment back as they have given and in this can let life slip them by and wonder were did their life go, when in fact it passed before their eyes as they were so focused on others lives rather than their own.
The martyr will often be walking in denial and therefore when they fail to receive thanks from the partner they feel unhappy and fail to see that they initiated such response via their suffocating and suppressing actions upon another person.
Negatively selfish is a person who puts themselves in all things including the deliberate determent of others and being inconsiderate of others. They are selfish at the cost of others including forcing a person into submission and co-operation without allowing them to make their own choices. Often the strong partner dominates the weaker partner and forces them into self-sacrifice, which in turn is known as emotional abuse.
If I pressure someone to do something they do not want to do by making them feel guilty or by being unpleasant in some other way, I got what I wanted at their expense.
Ultimately this behavior is bad for both the selfish person and the people victimized and exploited by the selfish person.
Positively Selfish is a person who puts themselves first without any deliberate or ill effects on
others.
They help others because they want to and have no other motive. Helping others out of love and care rather than obligation they simply have a good feeling that they are doing the right thing at the right time. These people are happy in self and therefore can bring happiness to others avoiding guilt and manipulation unlike a martyr mindset would do in their shoes.
These people work with a mindset of being the highest version of them and will always do what is right for himself or herself but also for the person.