Personal Narrative: Nothing That Changed My Life

On the surface you could probably say this what happened shouldn't be that big of a deal, and you’re probably right. But what happened changed me and there is nothing that you can really say about that.
Two years ago in about mid september things couldn't have been going any better. I had near perfect grades and was actually having fun in every one of my classes. I had felt like nothing could stop me from having a fantastic year. But there was this girl I really liked and was so confident in myself I set a date where I would talk to her and try to hang out. When the day came I had chills for every period before my class with her. I just thought to myself “The worst she could say is say no” which doesn’t seem so bad. But still in my head I was riding off of my confidence that I had built up so far. I finally asked her and she
told me that she looking to date anybody.
I put on a fake smile and said it’s totally fine, but I was immediately crushed on the inside, I had put so much thought into everything that it totally killed me. I had never felt this kind of feeling ever, it’s almost like it sucked every bit of confidence that I had built myself up to right out of me. You could realize the effects very quick as my grades almost immediately dropped off. I had gone from straight A’s to C’s then I started failing classes. I didn't even want to get up for school out of just not wanting to feel bad about what I had done when I saw her. Some days I would sleep in when I wanted to, when before I had not missed a single day of school. I finally told one of my friends about what happened and they helped me get through the rest of the year by making laugh about it,
but I still failed the year horrifically and on the inside I still felt terrible about everything even I totally understood her reasoning. But I was never the same person, just a shell of my former self. The next year I never talked to anybody, remaining silent for pretty much the whole year. I made no new friends and avoided everybody besides my closest friends. I continued to get no better than C’s on any of my classes. I just wanted to lie down every day and do nothing but sit in my bed doing nothing in silence. I never turned in homework, my motivation to do anything productive completely gone. I thought I never be my old happy joking self ever again. But after just barely passing my classes. During the summer I started finding peace in riding my bike 2 miles to the local library and sitting in silence reading and just taking naps in peace and quiet.
But one day I woke up around 9:00 AM to go to the library again, when I passed her just walking on her own on the same sidewalk I was riding through. We looked at each other very puzzled but she immediately looked away from me. When I got to the library I just sat on a bench and just thought about the hell I had just put myself and my parents through for two whole years over stupid thoughts about somebody who didn’t even care for me. Once I had realized what I had done to my grades and relationships with the people that truly cared about me I dropped into tears. But once I was done I had realized the colossal mistake I made. And even though it cost me two years of my life that could have been filled with great times. I will never forget the lesson I learned, and slowly but surely have been coming further and further out of the shell I had been hiding in for so long.
After 730 days of keeping my eyes closed, I opened them and haven’t looked back ever since.