Reflective Essay: The Discovery Of Self Identity

The discovery of self identity is more often than not a long and painful process that never really ends, it only progresses, but it resides as a testimony to personal growth that everyone must endure. When my sister died in my freshman year of high school I was forced to confront my own individuality and identity without an older sister by my side to guide me as I was used to.. For the first time since I was born I lived in a house as if I were an only child, just my parents and I. It really is a strange thing, having someone there one moment to discuss the prospects of heaven, hell, books, Narnia, and the current crush, then suddenly be left to find your own answers. I was left crushed and heartbroken, and felt part of me had died, too, but perhaps that feeling of nothingness paved the way for me to find out who I truly am, a journey everyone has to undergo at some point.
For a long time I did nothing, then 10th grade started, forcing me out of my bedroom and back into reality. My initial loneliness and want of my sister soon turned to thoughts of how perfect she was and how dreary I was in comparison. So I did the only thing which made sense to me at the time. Without a distinguished personality to call my own, I tried to take on hers, adopting her wardrobe, philosophy of positivity, and
I have always considered the need for the majority greater then the need for the one. Identity is not a straightforward question of who I am but a constant journey of trying to find the best me I can be. While I don’t fully understand what my identity is, I feel it important to explain all that a search for identity has made me question and attempt to understand, because, while I don’t fully grasp who I am or who I am supposed to be I do know that the endless search for identity has changed me in ways that are irreversible and I’d like to think for the