Self Esteem and Satisfaction in Romantic Relationships

Self-esteem is a widely studied construct in psychology. It has even gained popularity over

time, and spilled into the mainstream media. While it is a widely known concept, it has come to

encompass an array of attitudes, not all of which are accurate (Crocker & Park, 2004). However,

before detailing into an account on self-esteem, we first need to define it. Self-esteem simply put

is the amount of value people put onto themselves. (Baumeister, Campbell, Krueger & Vohs,

2003). Hence, individuals with high self-esteem (HSEs) have a positive evaluation of themselves,

whereas individuals with low self-esteem (LSEs) have a negative evaluation of themselves. It is

only a perception, based on an evaluation of his or her characteristics, not on objective measures.

While the idea that HSEs do much better in life than LSEs is attractive and popular, recent

research has shown that HSE does not necessarily lead to success in school, or at work.

(Baumeister, Campbell, Krueger & Vohs, 2003; Crocker & Park, 2004). While HSE does not

necessarily lead to success, HSE is more advantageous in interpersonal relationships. LSEs were

chronically dissatisfied with their romantic relationships (Cavallo, Fitzsimons & Holmes, 2009).

This can be explained by the tendency for LSEs to engage in potentially destructive behaviors like

hostility, avoidance or aggression. (Bellavia & Murray, 2003; Crocker & Park, 2004)

LSE’s lower satisfaction in their romantic relationships compared to HSEs can be

explained by several reasons. Firstly, LSEs yearn for higher levels of acceptance from their

partners, but are less willing to accept positive feedback. They also believe that their partner’s

love is conditional, upon presence of certain positive qualities. Unsure if they possess such

qualities, they do not develop trust towards their partner. LSEs also have self-concept confusion,

leaving them more vulnerable to external sources of stimuli,

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