The ACA Code Of Ethics And Values

Forgiveness, tolerance, empathy and acceptance, these are the values that make up the core of who I am. I am a Christian, there is no doubt of that but as a true follower of Christ you must also follow his example. The line maybe straight and narrow, but it is there. My mother has a beautiful picture hanging in her home of Christ and an adulterous woman at his feet with crowds gathered round to stone her. The bible verse and story for this artwork is found in the King James Bible, John chapter 8: 3-11 ‘He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her.’ (KJB, 2016). This is a humbling and profound scene. No stones were cast, because none of us is without sin. Two of the Ten Commandments are, thou shalt not kill
and thou shalt not commit adultery. There are a great many sins in the world and God could have listed them all but he only listed ten. The commandments are a set of biblical principles relating to ethics and worship, which play a fundamental role in Christianity. From a Christian standpoint abortion and adultery are great sins.
Abortion is a very complicated subject and value for me. I was raised as a Christian and most Christians are 'Pro-life.' Honestly, I had to look up the definition of Pro-life and Pro-choice because I wasn't sure which I was, if I was any. Pro-life as defined by Merriam-Webster dictionary means opposed to abortion. Pro-choice is defined as favoring the legalization of abortion. I'm a little disappointed in both of these definitions. When I think of Pro-life, I think of every life counts, every person is important even if they’re unborn, not just opposed to abortion. When I think of Pro-choice I think of having a right to choose, not just legalize abortion. My values are every life counts and I also think a women has a right to choose. We’ve all heard that abortion stops a beating heart, is a variety of murder, and that those who value life will not only not have abortions, they will not tolerate a society which allows them. We have heard that the presence of abortion cheapens life in society and facilitates sexual irresponsibility. Abortion cases often present us with genuine moral dilemmas because they introduce conflicts between values we hold. The only easy way to resolve these conflicts is to deny, or at least underplay, one or more of our values. But the way of moral maturity would rather allow the conflict of values to deepen our understanding of our own firmly held moral convictions. This way is generally more complex and sometimes more painful, but it leads to a clearer enunciation of those Christian principles that should inform our decisions. As much as any other moral problem in this world, abortion reveals the need for such forgiveness. No woman ever becomes pregnant in order to have an abortion. No woman who experiences sexual violence wants to become pregnant. The fact that this victim was raped and became pregnant creates an even more moral dilemma. There is no question in my mind that almost every abortion performed, however justly chosen, tears just a little bit at those values and desensitizes us just a little bit to what we hold dear.
The 19-year-old rape victim is my client, not her parents.
Clearly as a counselor the more support a client has the better chance for success. My client will need the support and love from her parents. Trying to convince my client’s parents to agree with her decision would contradict my values and code of ethics as a counselor. The ACA Code of Ethics section A.1.a. Primary Responsibility states 'the primary responsibility of counselors is to respect the dignity and promote the welfare of clients. A.4.b. Personal Values states Counselors are aware of—and avoid imposing—their own values, attitudes, beliefs, and behaviors. It is not my responsibility to convince them to agree with their daughter’s decision. It is my responsibility to give them the information statistically and rationally about the situation their daughter finds herself in. Rape is not a sex crime. It is a crime of violence, a deeply personal and unwanted violation of a human being, a brutal exertion of power and control over another person. Power, not sexual desire , drives the assailant. Victimizers can be husbands, boyfriends, family members and acquaintances. It is my responsibility to counsel my client and create a safe
environment.

Extramarital affairs. (Both spouses in a couple you are counseling are having affairs, which they claim are not contributing in any way to their current marital difficulties. They want your help in strengthening their marriage but they are both committed to the “open marriage” concept that does not require sexual monogamy.)

The Ten Commandments are considered to be universal laws.
These laws are practiced and preached by nearly a third of all 6.9 billion people on Earth. Despite widespread agreement on Christian moral value in these rules, they are often and continually broken by society. “Thou shall not commit adultery.” People sometimes wonder if an exception is allowed in case the spouse cannot or will not have sex, or if the couple is separated, or for other reasons. However, the Bible does not mention any possible exceptions. Therefore, as long as a couple is legally married, sex with anyone else is considered adultery. There must be overwhelming reasons for people attempting to cheat on their spouse or significant other; otherwise it would not keep happening. We can look for different reasons, excuses and validations for the cause, some people may simply be tired of going through the motions with their spouse and are looking for a one-night stand. Others may simply feel the need to do something daring and exhilarating as a break from their mundane lives. Whatever the motive is behind extramarital affairs, it does not negate the repercussions or consequences that follow when the affair is revealed. Open marriage is definitely an unexplored territory for me as far as understanding the ideas and justifications of it. I had to read several articles and journals from scholarly sources as how to approach this issue from an unbiased non-judgmental point of view. From what I gather, the
choice of having an open relationship never saves the marriage. Rather, it makes a joke of the marriage and is destructive to the marriage. It is relationship suicide to include another intimate partner or partners into your world, in addition to your spouse. Dr. Karen Ruskin explains that couples that choose to have an open marriage simply do not know how to have a successful monogamous relationship. Rather than improving and growing within the marriage, they utilize the external to focus their energy on (Ruskin, 2011). I have read that couples wanting to engage in an open marriage use rules as guidelines to try to ensure that neither spouse gets emotionally hurt and that they are both on the same page. No matter what rules you and your spouse create to ensure a successful and agreed-upon additional partner experience, know this: these rules will never work. In conclusion, it is my opinion that having an open relationship is a detrimental non-solution for marriages. It is relationship suicide and a problem just waiting to negatively impact the emotional welfare of self, other, the couple, and if you have children, your children as well. In counseling my couple against an open marriage does not come from a moral standpoint but a statistical, provable and unbiased position that my couple has decided to live a polyamorous lifestyle, which ultimately brought them into my office to discuss the matter of why they are still unfulfilled in their marriage and unhappy. My couple was able to recognize what some of their relationship problems were but failed to recognize or do not want to recognize the damage being done by having an open marriage.