After Dinner Speech
Topic: how Barbie is a good influence on girls (sarcastic)
Audience: parents at a toy convention
Good evening everyone, and welcome to the Toy Expo of 2012. I hope we all enjoyed our low calorie dinner, which will help you achieve the perfect doll like body. Anyways, let me introduce myself, my name is Barbie and I will be your host tonight. Now, now, before you blame me for your daughter’s insecurities, I am telling you that it is not my fault. Just because I am skinny and blonde, it doesn’t mean that others need to be in order to be beautiful, although it might help… Anyways, tonight I am here to talk to you about a serious matter that affects everyone of you in here. It has come to my attention, that you, as parents, seem to believe that myself and my fellow Barbie’s are intending to set a bad example for your children, well in this speech I will suggest to you that, that is not true. First, I would like everyone to visualize yourself as a Barbie- now try not to get too jealous; it’s not our fault we were modeled after perfection. Anyways, imagine your local toy store, the store is filled with you and all these “wanna be’s” secured in a paper wrapping from that rainforest that is now non-existent, and you are sitting on the shelf waiting to get picked up by a new owner! So that moment comes, when a little girl picks you up and asks her mommy if she can have you. While your getting your hopes up, because you believe your finally going to a true home, the little girls mom is thinking about things such as her little girl will realize she does not look and act like a Barbie and get upset. Because of this, her mom says no and you are left on the shelf collecting dust. Okay, now become yourselves again and lets think logically for a second. Since, you have just denied your daughter from years and years of happiness because you would not let her the new doll she drooled over, she is going to be very upset with you, and we both know how that will turn out.
Audience: parents at a toy convention
Good evening everyone, and welcome to the Toy Expo of 2012. I hope we all enjoyed our low calorie dinner, which will help you achieve the perfect doll like body. Anyways, let me introduce myself, my name is Barbie and I will be your host tonight. Now, now, before you blame me for your daughter’s insecurities, I am telling you that it is not my fault. Just because I am skinny and blonde, it doesn’t mean that others need to be in order to be beautiful, although it might help… Anyways, tonight I am here to talk to you about a serious matter that affects everyone of you in here. It has come to my attention, that you, as parents, seem to believe that myself and my fellow Barbie’s are intending to set a bad example for your children, well in this speech I will suggest to you that, that is not true. First, I would like everyone to visualize yourself as a Barbie- now try not to get too jealous; it’s not our fault we were modeled after perfection. Anyways, imagine your local toy store, the store is filled with you and all these “wanna be’s” secured in a paper wrapping from that rainforest that is now non-existent, and you are sitting on the shelf waiting to get picked up by a new owner! So that moment comes, when a little girl picks you up and asks her mommy if she can have you. While your getting your hopes up, because you believe your finally going to a true home, the little girls mom is thinking about things such as her little girl will realize she does not look and act like a Barbie and get upset. Because of this, her mom says no and you are left on the shelf collecting dust. Okay, now become yourselves again and lets think logically for a second. Since, you have just denied your daughter from years and years of happiness because you would not let her the new doll she drooled over, she is going to be very upset with you, and we both know how that will turn out.