Analyzing The Poem 'One Today'

For the poem “One Today” the five word choices that I would replace if I was the original writer would have to be kindled, vital, story, sorrow, and children. For example in the very first sentence of the poem “One sun rose on us today, kindled over our shores.” The reason why I would replace the word kindled to the word arouse, is because I perceive that people would greatly understand the word arouse more than kindled. Now let’s move on to the next word shall we! In this case I would change the word vital, which is happens to be in the third paragraph first sentence saying “All of us as vital as the one light we move through.” I would then change it to indispensable because I feel as though the word indispensable indicates the importance
In addition to, the word sorrow from the third stanza in the sentence “The impossible vocabulary of sorrow that won’t explain empty desks of twenty children marked absent today.” I would replace sorrow with the word despondency because that’s how we feel as a people sometimes when we have very high hopes for a new day or a change in the world and then all of the sudden; that hope is taken from us, as if it was ripped from under our feet. Now I’ve come to my last and final word change which is children, from the sentence “Warmth onto the steps of our museums and park and benches as mothers watch children slide into the day,” I want to exchange the word children for progeny because I feel that the word gives more of a descriptive tone to the poem; I feel as though we as a people are all progenies to our ancestors before us, which is my reason for choosing this