Argumentative Essay On Closed Adoption
Adoption has been around since ancient times. Children at that time were given up be a slave or to become an heir for their adopted family’s name (Rowen). As time went on, however, adoption became more for the well-being of the child. Up until 1917 these adoptions were very informal. Informal adoptions could be described similar to transferring deeds of a house to a new owner (Carroll). Minnesota thought it was time to make adoption more official. They passed a law which required a child welfare agency to investigate every child that was placed with a new family. This law created what is known as closed adoption (Rowen). The government thought closed adoptions would allow the child to bond with their adoptive parents without the birth parents
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getting in the way. Many children had similar stories as the one above and thought it was their right to know their biological families and their histories. After the federal government heard multiple stories from the adoptive children, open adoption was introduced in 1970. Open adoption allows the child to know information about their biological parents and their medical histories. There are different types of open adoption. In some open adoptions the parents can be involved in the child’s life. The terms on how often this is allowed is set by the adoptive parents (Carroll). It is very important for a child to know their background. Everyone has their own identity which can include beliefs, culture, or ethnicity. If you are not given the chance to find out who you truly are, you feel incomplete and empty. This is the case for children given up through closed adoption. They are not given the chance to find out their family history and where they come from, so they have an emotional void that can never be filled. JaNae Goodrich grew up though a closed adoption. She said, “A part of me was not complete. I had a lost sense of identity because I had no idea what my ethnic background is. This would always bother me because I know nothing about my birth family while my friends would always talk about their families” (Chapman). She, along with other children given up through closed adoption, also wonder many questions. These questions can included who are my parents?, what are they like?, where are they now?, why was I given up?, and do I have any other family?. Teresa Stinson who was given up through closed adoption confirmed this when she said “I had a happy childhood, but I always knew I was adopted and had questions. Just millions of questions. Where did I come from? Did my birth mother ever think about me” (Pitts et al.) Teresa also felt incomplete like JaNae before she found her mother. She said, “For the first time, I finally felt “complete” because I was able to find out information about my past” (Pitts et al.). Could you imagine being in Stinson or Goodrich’s shoes and growing up wondering if you were loved by your parents and why you were given up? Children given up through open adoption will never have to wonder those questions. They can have their birth parents to answer any questions they have and understand why they were given up.
It is important to know your background to gain a sense of identity, but it is equally important to know your background for medical purposes. Knowing your medical history can help prevent any issues that may run in families such as heart problems, high blood pressure, cancer, depression. The adoptees can go to the doctors and let them know what they should be looking for. It was crucial for Cathy Heslin to learn about her medical history. She was able to reconnect with her birth mother and found out that brain aneurysms run in her family. She now knows that she has to schedule periodic MRIs to screen for aneurysms. Steve Kelly was in a similar situation as Heslin when it came to his medical history. He was trying to build a family with this wife. Their first daughter was stillborn due to a genetic condition and their second daughter began to have seizures at a very young age. He wanted to found out if he had a history of a genetic condition that might be causing these problems (Esposito). If someone were given up through an open adoption the children would never have to go through any of these hard situations because they can contact their birth parents. Laura is the adoptive mother of Ariel.
Laura chose an open adoption because her sister was adopted through a closed adoption and it brought no blessing to her. Laura believed that the secrecy of closed adoption brought her sister to have issues with anxiety and low self esteem. Laura said, “Ariel hasn’t had to deal with identity issues to the same degree as my sister. She knows her birthparents, and with that, she knows a lot more about herself. She knows who she looks like and her inherited medical history. Most importantly, she knows why she was given for adoption and that her biological parents loves her. It is essential that Ariel feels comfortable with her adoption and perceive her birthparents as positive, wonderful factors in her life” (“Open Adoption”). Ariel’s adoptive father also believes open adoption can help a child because, “In closed adoption, you face the prospect of keeping a secret and lying to your child about his or her origin. That violates the most basic relationship between a parent and child: TRUST!” (“Open Adoption”). Having the biological parents in the child’s life to inform them will help them understand who they are and creates a stronger relationship between both the child and the adoptive
family.
The adoptive parents will also not have to worry about their child when it comes to medical issues because the biological parents will be in their lives to inform them. The adoptive parents can look out for any warning signs or get their child regularly tested for anything that might run in the family. An adoptive mother brought a child home through a closed adoption when the child was 18 months old. She said, “ I am a much more jumpy parent when it comes to my adopted children’s health. Because I do not know my adopted children’s history, I am much more quick to rush them in to see the pediatrician for a cough. “Do they have a family history of asthma?? I don’t know. Let’s double-check this cough isn’t a wheeze” is kind of how my thinking goes. Do my son’s birth parents wear glasses? I don’t know. Let’s see an optometrist just to make sure he doesn’t need glasses. When did my daughter’s birth mother go through puberty? I have no idea, so I have no clue when my daughter will too.” (Emma). Another example that worried the adoptive parents was when a couple adopted a sweet three year old girl. She was having some issue and doctors were not sure what to all search for. This three year old girl was later diagnosed with Reactive Attachment Disorder and ADHD. Her disorders required intensive treatment (Ladijules). The parents had no clue that she had these disorders ran in her family. If the adoptive parents knew about her medical history, they might have been able to help her treat these disorders earlier.
The adoptive parents also do not have to see their child go through the process of searching for the birthparents. It hurts any parent to see a child upset. Some child may never found out where their biological parents are or worse may be disappointed in what they found out. Recent research found out the seven percent of adoptees experience outright rejection. Although the percentage is low, it still does not make a person feel great about themselves to be reject by their biological parents. Adam met his birth mother when he was thirty. He said, “My birth mother wanted me to act out the role of long-lost son, but I didn’t want a new mother. I just wanted to know where I came from. After about 10 years, I’d had enough- although every two years, I’d give it another go. I’d spend a couple of hours with her, then wonder why I’d bothered. A few years ago, I stopped contact”(Hilpern).
The parents also may not give up the child up for a better home if they can not be informed on the child. For example, Sara was a sixteen-year-old girl that got pregnant. She planned on keeping the baby but realized when she was about seven months along that she did not want to be a welfare case. She wanted to be part of this child’s life, but she knew that she should not be taking care of this child. She was still growing up herself and would not be able to support herself and the baby. She put the baby up through an open adoption so the baby would have a better life. She could still be informed of her child’s life, but she was still able to continue with her own life and grow up herself (“Open Adoption”). Some of the parents may not be able to support the child like the sixteen year old girl, but refused to lose the child. The child would not be able to have a better life if closed adoption was the only option to give up a child.
The biological parents can also be informed on the condition of the family raising them. Some children given up through adoption are not placed in the greatest homes. The child might be miserable because they are treated unfairly. Hana Williams was adopted by Larry and Carri Williams. One night the family found Hana dead on the ground outside of the house. Carri would say that Hana was rebellious and she killed herself by staying outside and getting hyperthermia. Later the police found out that Carri actually had her sons go outside and beat Hana up. Larry and Carri were arrested for the death of Hana (Joyce). If she was given up through open adoption the biological parents would have been able to be involved and see that the family was a problem. When choosing a child to adopt many parents fear to chose the path of open adoption because they fear the that they will be jealous or threatened by the biological parents in the child’s life. The biological parents may even try to take control on how to raise the child.
They believe the child may love their biological parents more and abandon them when they get older. These fears are very understandable. Every adoptive parent will always be concerned about these because they are not biological parent. These fears that the adoptive parents have are hardly ever a reality. In fact most of the parents are glad the biological parents are in their life. At Open Adoption and Family Services they found that eighty percent of the parents who adopted a child through open adoption did not feel jealous of the birthparents (“Fears and Facts”). All open adoption also require the two sets of parents to set up an agreement on how often the birthparents are allowed to see the child per year and send photos. The child is also found to have created a strong bond with their adoptive family so they do not abandon their family. Some even say they gain an extended family by having the biological parents in their lives.
getting in the way. Many children had similar stories as the one above and thought it was their right to know their biological families and their histories. After the federal government heard multiple stories from the adoptive children, open adoption was introduced in 1970. Open adoption allows the child to know information about their biological parents and their medical histories. There are different types of open adoption. In some open adoptions the parents can be involved in the child’s life. The terms on how often this is allowed is set by the adoptive parents (Carroll). It is very important for a child to know their background. Everyone has their own identity which can include beliefs, culture, or ethnicity. If you are not given the chance to find out who you truly are, you feel incomplete and empty. This is the case for children given up through closed adoption. They are not given the chance to find out their family history and where they come from, so they have an emotional void that can never be filled. JaNae Goodrich grew up though a closed adoption. She said, “A part of me was not complete. I had a lost sense of identity because I had no idea what my ethnic background is. This would always bother me because I know nothing about my birth family while my friends would always talk about their families” (Chapman). She, along with other children given up through closed adoption, also wonder many questions. These questions can included who are my parents?, what are they like?, where are they now?, why was I given up?, and do I have any other family?. Teresa Stinson who was given up through closed adoption confirmed this when she said “I had a happy childhood, but I always knew I was adopted and had questions. Just millions of questions. Where did I come from? Did my birth mother ever think about me” (Pitts et al.) Teresa also felt incomplete like JaNae before she found her mother. She said, “For the first time, I finally felt “complete” because I was able to find out information about my past” (Pitts et al.). Could you imagine being in Stinson or Goodrich’s shoes and growing up wondering if you were loved by your parents and why you were given up? Children given up through open adoption will never have to wonder those questions. They can have their birth parents to answer any questions they have and understand why they were given up.
It is important to know your background to gain a sense of identity, but it is equally important to know your background for medical purposes. Knowing your medical history can help prevent any issues that may run in families such as heart problems, high blood pressure, cancer, depression. The adoptees can go to the doctors and let them know what they should be looking for. It was crucial for Cathy Heslin to learn about her medical history. She was able to reconnect with her birth mother and found out that brain aneurysms run in her family. She now knows that she has to schedule periodic MRIs to screen for aneurysms. Steve Kelly was in a similar situation as Heslin when it came to his medical history. He was trying to build a family with this wife. Their first daughter was stillborn due to a genetic condition and their second daughter began to have seizures at a very young age. He wanted to found out if he had a history of a genetic condition that might be causing these problems (Esposito). If someone were given up through an open adoption the children would never have to go through any of these hard situations because they can contact their birth parents. Laura is the adoptive mother of Ariel.
Laura chose an open adoption because her sister was adopted through a closed adoption and it brought no blessing to her. Laura believed that the secrecy of closed adoption brought her sister to have issues with anxiety and low self esteem. Laura said, “Ariel hasn’t had to deal with identity issues to the same degree as my sister. She knows her birthparents, and with that, she knows a lot more about herself. She knows who she looks like and her inherited medical history. Most importantly, she knows why she was given for adoption and that her biological parents loves her. It is essential that Ariel feels comfortable with her adoption and perceive her birthparents as positive, wonderful factors in her life” (“Open Adoption”). Ariel’s adoptive father also believes open adoption can help a child because, “In closed adoption, you face the prospect of keeping a secret and lying to your child about his or her origin. That violates the most basic relationship between a parent and child: TRUST!” (“Open Adoption”). Having the biological parents in the child’s life to inform them will help them understand who they are and creates a stronger relationship between both the child and the adoptive
family.
The adoptive parents will also not have to worry about their child when it comes to medical issues because the biological parents will be in their lives to inform them. The adoptive parents can look out for any warning signs or get their child regularly tested for anything that might run in the family. An adoptive mother brought a child home through a closed adoption when the child was 18 months old. She said, “ I am a much more jumpy parent when it comes to my adopted children’s health. Because I do not know my adopted children’s history, I am much more quick to rush them in to see the pediatrician for a cough. “Do they have a family history of asthma?? I don’t know. Let’s double-check this cough isn’t a wheeze” is kind of how my thinking goes. Do my son’s birth parents wear glasses? I don’t know. Let’s see an optometrist just to make sure he doesn’t need glasses. When did my daughter’s birth mother go through puberty? I have no idea, so I have no clue when my daughter will too.” (Emma). Another example that worried the adoptive parents was when a couple adopted a sweet three year old girl. She was having some issue and doctors were not sure what to all search for. This three year old girl was later diagnosed with Reactive Attachment Disorder and ADHD. Her disorders required intensive treatment (Ladijules). The parents had no clue that she had these disorders ran in her family. If the adoptive parents knew about her medical history, they might have been able to help her treat these disorders earlier.
The adoptive parents also do not have to see their child go through the process of searching for the birthparents. It hurts any parent to see a child upset. Some child may never found out where their biological parents are or worse may be disappointed in what they found out. Recent research found out the seven percent of adoptees experience outright rejection. Although the percentage is low, it still does not make a person feel great about themselves to be reject by their biological parents. Adam met his birth mother when he was thirty. He said, “My birth mother wanted me to act out the role of long-lost son, but I didn’t want a new mother. I just wanted to know where I came from. After about 10 years, I’d had enough- although every two years, I’d give it another go. I’d spend a couple of hours with her, then wonder why I’d bothered. A few years ago, I stopped contact”(Hilpern).
The parents also may not give up the child up for a better home if they can not be informed on the child. For example, Sara was a sixteen-year-old girl that got pregnant. She planned on keeping the baby but realized when she was about seven months along that she did not want to be a welfare case. She wanted to be part of this child’s life, but she knew that she should not be taking care of this child. She was still growing up herself and would not be able to support herself and the baby. She put the baby up through an open adoption so the baby would have a better life. She could still be informed of her child’s life, but she was still able to continue with her own life and grow up herself (“Open Adoption”). Some of the parents may not be able to support the child like the sixteen year old girl, but refused to lose the child. The child would not be able to have a better life if closed adoption was the only option to give up a child.
The biological parents can also be informed on the condition of the family raising them. Some children given up through adoption are not placed in the greatest homes. The child might be miserable because they are treated unfairly. Hana Williams was adopted by Larry and Carri Williams. One night the family found Hana dead on the ground outside of the house. Carri would say that Hana was rebellious and she killed herself by staying outside and getting hyperthermia. Later the police found out that Carri actually had her sons go outside and beat Hana up. Larry and Carri were arrested for the death of Hana (Joyce). If she was given up through open adoption the biological parents would have been able to be involved and see that the family was a problem. When choosing a child to adopt many parents fear to chose the path of open adoption because they fear the that they will be jealous or threatened by the biological parents in the child’s life. The biological parents may even try to take control on how to raise the child.
They believe the child may love their biological parents more and abandon them when they get older. These fears are very understandable. Every adoptive parent will always be concerned about these because they are not biological parent. These fears that the adoptive parents have are hardly ever a reality. In fact most of the parents are glad the biological parents are in their life. At Open Adoption and Family Services they found that eighty percent of the parents who adopted a child through open adoption did not feel jealous of the birthparents (“Fears and Facts”). All open adoption also require the two sets of parents to set up an agreement on how often the birthparents are allowed to see the child per year and send photos. The child is also found to have created a strong bond with their adoptive family so they do not abandon their family. Some even say they gain an extended family by having the biological parents in their lives.