College Admissions Essay: Failing In Middle School

According to Buddha, “The only real failure in life is not to be true to the best one knows." Failing is hard especially when you haven't experienced its full effect. Ever since kindergarten, I was an honor roll student. I received all the certificates and recognition, I got to eat lunch with the teacher, which then was a goal for most kids my age. Entering middle school, I was confident that I'd be just as successful. First quarter grades were passed out and knocked me right out of the clouds of glory. Sixth grade advanced math was the one class I dreaded, and in that class I received my very first 'F.' I lost a huge piece of my confidence because I couldn’t memorize simple steps like everyone else could, no matter how hard I tried.
For me, it was my inner voice that did the bullying. Telling myself, "I can't do it" or "I will never get it." Around that time I didn’t understand the concept of having to fail many times in order to succeed to one's full potential. Each time I got a bad grade, I would cry because I knew no other way to cope. I constantly shielded myself from the outside world. Embarrassed and heartbroken, I would stay in my room and just read. Exploring Christ and Buddhism during this time. Then I ran across a book, a small green book that I got from a neighbor who was leaving for college. With no title and very small print, it held what I believed to be my God sent answers. The three rules of success: 1. Fail 2. Assess 3. Rise. I had already reached step one. After my poor assessment, I instantly tried different ways to improve, from tutoring to online self help, but those were not enough. I was missing