Tagalog in my house. It was very confusing and frustrating to go from learning a language I’ve heard since birth to a completely different language. The lack of communication with my classmates and teachers made me scared to go to school every day. I couldn’t understand any directions that people tried to give me, and sometimes still don’t, just because I can’t grasp a clear definition of what the person needs are. However, fourth grade, I had become bilingual. I adapted to speaking English at school with my friends and communicating in Tagalog with my parents. It is a different story for my younger sister and brothers. All three of them speak better English because they started their education here in the United States. My advantage is, I know how to respond to my parents in Tagalog, while my siblings cannot. Writing this essay is difficult because I have so many thoughts in my head and want to write a specific way, but not being able to achieve it, because I worry about saying it wrong, or not being normal.
Growing up in a world that feels unwelcoming at such a young age, shapes a person in a way that makes her become more open with how she views the world. I believe that people who take things for granted and without having that restriction or worry become spoiled in the world. I didn't realize then, as a six year old, that I should have been grateful and lucky to be bilingual, that being different wasn’t bad, but special. Even today I have times when I feel that uneasy emotion of not being part of the group. I can’t change the person I was born as, where I was born, who I was going to live with or even have that decision to move across the world. Being different at a young age made me more aware and intrigued to learn. I was shy, introverted, and truly outcast from my classes. Through the years, I taught myself to learn something new each day and set small goals to try to talk to people, to get to know someone. Today, with telling myself to talk to classmates and teachers, I’ve gained long lasting friends who I can always go to with my
problems.
Going through a journey I’m not yet finished with can be unsettling. Although I’m not ready for the end, I look back on my journey into senior year of high school feeling nostalgic about even the tiny obstacles I went through, from moving across the world, breaking out of my shell, to accepting who I am and have become. With every little obstacle I have learned from the outcome. That learning makes me who I am today.There’s more to my journey, and I know I’ll conquer anything that heads my way.