Dare To Discipline

Summary:
This second review is based on the book The New Dare to Discipline, written by Dr. James Dobson and published by Tyndale Publishing Inc. 1992. This book not only distinctively illustrates the potential challenges from childhood through the adolescent years, but provides heartfelt advice through both personal and professional experiences. Once again Dr. Dobson does an exceptional job incorporating scripture as not only a tool, but as a support of his parental disciplining philosophies. Overall the book covers a significant amount of both potential and definite issues that can prove problematic for many and offers not only a plethora of tools, but also provides a questions and answers section that make it not only relatable, but easy
Here Dr. Dobson not only reinforces the importance of teaching children about God, but the significance of beginning early during the critical years. “Concepts of right and wrong as well as their view of God are formulated and solidified during this brief period of childhood in which children are most vulnerable to religious training” (Dobson, 1992). Throughout my childhood, my mother spoke of her faith in God and shared stories of her experience with prayer and the strength it gave her. Like the gosling mentioned in this book, she exposed me to her passion for Christ. Therefore, while there was no shortage of faith within my family, I credit my mother for instilling a foundation based on faith and teaching me the love of God. Our last trip to Japan during the summer I turned twelve, would prove significant as it would be during this visit we would both lose our mothers. However, even during this tumultuous time, my mother’s strength was evident, as true to her faith, she continued to worship God, which in turn strengthened me. While this book answers the many difficult questions of parenthood, it ultimately reaffirms the importance of a foundation based on faith and its significance on our children’s lives. “Train up a child in the way he should go, even when he is old he will not depart from it” (Proverbs 22:6
Although, children may refrain from doing a particular action, their reluctance would be due to fear of the punishment, as opposed to because it was wrong. As discipline derives from the word disciple, meaning to teach, I believe it more relative to utilize a method that would promote an intrinsic value as opposed to fear. Moreover, along with the suggestion to use objects instead of the hand, in chapter 4, when responding to a parent regarding the ineffectiveness of “spankings” with her children, he suggests amongst other reasons “if it doesn’t hurt it wouldn’t deter the behavior, thus the spanking may be too gentle” (Dobson, 1992). This was concerning, as the potential for further escalation exists, when a pop on the bottom no longer works the force must be increased to deliver the message. While, he clearly states he does not advocate abuse, I believe there are many that would misconstrue his recommendations as validation, as it is typically a knee-jerk reaction oftentimes derived from unrelated issues. However, while I respect the beliefs of others, I ultimately believe that exercising positive parenting techniques is far better for the overall well-being of a child. “While alternatives to spanking may be more thought-and-conscience provoking for the child, they take more time and energy from the parent, hence the reason many result to spanking, it’s easier”