Differences Between Creator And Victim Behaviors

Creator and Victim Behaviors
Creator and victim behaviors can vary from person to person. A person who demonstrates a typical creator behavior knows when he/she is wrong and will admit to it. He/she will also try his/her best to fix the problem or situation that he/she created. A person who demonstrates a typical victim behavior will blame another person for his/her troubles and problems. He/she will also make other people fix it without admitting that he/she was in the wrong. Although these are the typical creator and victim behaviors a person can demonstrate both.
Having a creator behavior means being grown up enough to admit when you’ve done wrong. It takes a strong person. My mother has overcome a lot growing up and she demonstrates creator behavior all the time. When we kids would get in trouble at school, she wouldn’t blame the teacher and say the teacher was in the wrong. She would tell us that we were wrong and she would blame herself for letting us get out of hand. Every time she makes a mistake she owns up to it so she can learn from it.
Having a victim behavior means always blaming someone else, it’s never your fault.
My boyfriend’s grandfather plays victim every day of his life. Every time my boyfriend makes a mistake, his grandfather tells him it isn’t his fault it’s my fault, or his coach’s fault, or his best friend’s fault. According to his grandfather, Kenneth has never made a mistake in his life. He is perfect. He teaches him that it is always someone else’s fault and he isn’t to blame. This has put Kenneth in a lot of dilemmas with school and basketball. When Kenneth disrespects his coach his grandfather tells him it’s the coach’s fault he didn’t get playing time. The excuse is he is a terrible coach, but in reality he lost his spot because of his
attitude.
Creator and victim behaviors both have good and bad qualities. When a person demonstrates a creator behavior he/she is also demonstrating self-respect and self-confidence. On the contrary, he/she could also be demonstrating a “know-it-all” type of attitude. Playing the victim could have its perks and downsides as well. Playing victim shows self-esteem issues. Playing victim makes the person feel as if they have done nothing wrong, making themselves feel better about their self-worth. Are there really good qualities of a victim behavior? There might be. A lot of people hold in their anger by playing the role of a victim. This could be a good quality if the said person has anger issues. There are good and bad qualities to everything, sometimes you just have to look at it from all perspectives.
A time when I acted as a victim ruined something amazing. An old best friend and I were fighting, and all I could do was put the blame on her. I never admitted to doing anything wrong, when I did. I started being shallow and fake towards her. I used the excuse that she was changing, not me, and eventually I told her I was under the influence of fake friends. I could have easily just told her I’m sorry for being shallow and that it was all my fault but I never admitted it. I couldn’t. I was playing victim. To be a creator I should have apologized for wrong actions and blame no one for my mistakes.