Getting to the Origin of Bullying

Carlos J Vega Jr December 4, 2012
Final- Paper 3 English 093 7:00 Class
Getting to the Origin of Bullying In Lives of the Eminent Philosopher, Diogenes Laërtius says, “Why not whip the teacher when the student misbehaves?” There has been recent speculation in the subject of whether to prosecute bullies when their actions result in teenage suicides. With an unbelievable rate of one suicide per 13.7 minutes, the community’s response is to find someone to blame. (O’Connell) This brings up the issue: is it fair to take legal action on these bullies? After all, are not the bullies the back brace of these tragedies? Deeming bullies as criminals for their peers taking their lives seems to be too harsh of a consequence!
Though bullies should face consequences for their action, is making bullying a crime the correct answer? Making it a crime by law is only disregarding the origin of the issue, just another meaningless approach on these tragedies. Attempting to identify the emotional state of the bullies would be a more logical solution. Many variables come into play, such as lack of parenting. With better parenting, bullies learn to control their emotions and victims learn to defend themselves. Prosecuting bullies would not be the natural resolution to a severe problem, which is the cause of the bullies’ aggression. In order to deal with the issue of bullying, distinguish the basis of the bully’s desire to be offensive to other students, address why they feel the need to downgrade vulnerable students, and school bullies how to manage their aggressions. Teach the victims how to deal with confrontations. Bullying can be anywhere including pop culture, workspace, between family members, and most importantly schools. Bullying occurs when there is an imbalance of power between two people and a repeated aggressive action taken on the less powerful person. A bully may be physically stronger, have excellent social status, or be financially endowed; any of those factors could cause an imbalance of power. (Bullying Defined) Bullies’ behaviors can manifest in many ways such as: Verbal bullying executed through name calling and teasing, Physical bullying involving harming a person’s body or possessions, and/or Social bullying which sometimes involves hurting someone’s reputation or relationships (also referred to as relational bullying) (stopbullying.gov). One thing is certain; everyone has probably been in one or more of these situations during their adolescence. Now, more mature and educated, we begin to empower students and demonstrate how to overcome these obstacles.
Educating teens on how to deal with bullying in schools would be a start of the resolution. Begin by training teachers and staff how to identify vagaries in temperament and behavior of students to prevent violence and alienation. In many instances, the inexperienced teachers ignores student’s silent calls for help or visits the issue once and posts a report into the student's file. With proper training, teachers would be able to utilize the various methods learned to defuse situations, mediate between the bully and the victims, and incorporate third party bystanders. Teachers would in turn educate teens on proactive ways to deal with bullying. As a 2004 study showed, “Schools that focus on punishing bullies and counseling victims report more violence than schools that engage bystanders--and their parents--in understanding that saying something about what you see is not always tattling” (John Cloud). We must create a communal atmosphere by making others feel responsible, beginning with students and parents.
It is easy to accuse bullies for the victim’s suicides and anguish they go through in schools, but where do the parents fall into the picture? The back-story of the bullies and victims is what remains unheard. The media only directs viewers on how increasing of an “epidemic” it is. Contrary to the media, while disturbing, 37% of students do not feel safe at school because of bullying; this statistic has remained stable over decades (U.S. Department of Justice). While bullies should be accountable for the behaviors that promote their victim's pain and suffering, parents should be responsible for the guidance they provide. In some cases, a parental relationship could be missing in the child’s life.
Rosalind Wiseman, the author of the 2002 book Queen Bees & Wannabes, was a prosecutor for fifteen-year-old high school freshman Phoebe Prince’s suicide case, who hung herself due to unrelenting bullying. Note Wiseman did not consult students while the case was active. Wiseman wishes the adults or parents in the student's life would hold more responsibility for students’ behaviors (USAToday). While many point to the cause of Phoebe’s death at the fault of the bullies, this society judges from outside without knowing the real picture. Phoebe had moved from Ireland to Hadley, Massachusetts due to her parents divorce. This alone could have played a tremendous role in her suicide; in the past school essays she writes in depth how she misses her father. "Phoebe's parents were separating; her father, a writer who had gone into advertising stayed behind in Ireland.’’ A parent emotionally involved would see the pain, and not just a girl bullied, but also a child who was missing the other half of her life. She was a child living with the loss a father in a broken home. Looking into Phoebe’s physiological and mental health, parents and teachers would have seen red flags. Phoebe reads and discusses two Levenkron books: a novel about cutting (The Luckiest Girl in the World) and (Anatomy of Anorexia). The novels she read all contained the same theme of mental anguish and how to recover from them. In a sentence from her essay in which she was wrestling with that emotional pain in her own intellectual way is as follows: "From a personal point of view, I can see that Levenkron does truly understand the concept of self mutilation, and how it is not about suicide in most cases; it is about trying to transfer the pain from emotional to physical pain. It is much easier to deal with than for most adolescents who most likely, do not even understand how they are feeling.” (Slate.com) “These essays, and details about her home life, provide just small glimpses into Phoebe's thoughts. There are many more details to fill before we can have full picture-which matters for assessing the role that bullying played in her death.” (Slate.com)
Therefore, by examining Phoebe’s being, it shows a depressed teen. The emptiness of a father figure caused Phoebe to seek out an alternative. What do rebellious teen girls do when in need of that father figure? They gravitate to boys, with no concern for others, so for bullies to take full responsibility of these tragic deaths is simply ridiculous. Although sad, bullying is an element of ones upbringing; they must understand this phase should not last forever.
In fact, statistics indicate that as student progresses in grade, levels reports of bullying decreases. Middle school students reported being bullying about 36% of the time, compared to 25.8% of high school students. Keeping with that trend, in high school, the most bullied would be the freshmen class, or the youngest class. 28% of freshmen reported at least one bullying throughout the school year, compared to one in five seniors. (Koebler, Jason). As students grow closer to adulthood they mature, and start recognizing right from wrong. Schools are places student should coexist, evolving into adults and learning how to cope with real world situations. Eliminating bullying by making it a crime will not help, as it is part of society’s culture. Teachers should be the ones to be accountable for any student endangerment. In addition, third party spectators looking the other way while observing bullying should be accountable. School council should be responsible for educators and staff to identify the signs and the procedures to act accordingly.
There are profit and nonprofit organizations that assist in educating people about these problems. However, some are expensive and charge thousands of dollars to larger schools. Olweus Bullying Prevention Program is one of the largest antibullying companies but does the latter. Often, alternative methods can be recommended instead. Robin Lowe was principal for 25-years at Houston’s largest middle school. Lowe practices an uncommon method to confront the issue face-to-face. Lowe says, "probably once a week,” she meets with a parent clutching a printout showing Facebook wall posts that degrade one of her students. "Most of the time, it turns out that the kids engaged in typical middle-school feuds over breakups or hallway slights." She continues with "…no one is innocent on any of this" (Cloud, John). Furthermore, by displaying initiative and formulating these efforts to become part of the schools academic, in time there can be a solution, similar to the steps that Lowe has taken.
In addition, passing a law on bullying will come at a cost, perhaps a cut in the state education budgets or an increase in taxes. More than 200 school districts in the state of New Jersey reported spending more than $2 million to implement the state’s new anti-bullying law, according to survey results released by the New Jersey School Boards Association. This is just the tip of the iceberg. This amount is merely one state; imagine costs to befit federal laws. However, we fault the bullies. Parents are also at fault. Engulfed in their own lives while their children, potential future presidents, CEOs, lawmakers, and doctors, die out.
In conclusion, while religion speaks of forgiveness and society implores for forgiveness when immoral, why can we not pardon the youth for their childish antics? Instead, society chooses to convict them for these acts. It is a school’s responsibility to acquire resources and focus on the root of the problem. Real knowledge is to know the extent of one's ignorance (Confucius). Bullies are no different from the victims; they both hold deep emotional issues. Disregarding the bullies’ emotions would be unethical. These kids bully because of insecurities they hide. Show them everyone has insecurities and that we all have issues. To convict them would be a slap to parents’ and teachers’ faces. As adults, being responsible is to know ones own child and guide them how to improve as they grow. Neglecting salient issues creates the negative behavior we see in schools today. We will lose countless innocent lives after today, but this can change with one footstep at a time. Initiating changes in schools’ culture by compelling children to treat each other equally, as one prefers to be treated. A far-fetched idea, but Noah built the Ark on a single thought given, and it worked. In this case, the thoughts are to recognize, teach, and resolve.