How to Bathe a Cat

Bathing a cat is generally done only when necessary in order to save as much flesh as you can. This is why I am going to teach you from my experience the art of surviving a very angry, wet kitty. Some reasons why you would need to sacrifice yourself include: kittens may have poop and urine on their paws or body, or if after bottle feeding them they get milk all over themselves. Older cats may need to be bathed because they are too sick to clean themselves, or because they have incontinent accidents. Some cats have a skin rash that require a medicated shampoo. The cat can get something on it's body like tar, oil, tree sap or, god forbid skunk spray. These things will clog your cat's pores if it gets on it's skin or when able to self clean, your cat can become sick if it ingests too much. If the cat steps into something poisonous like weed killer, anti-freeze, rat poisons or insect sprays, these could cause your cat to become extremely sick and die if not treated in a timely manner. The Animal Poison Control Center Hotline is [phone]. A $55 consultation fee may be charged. Although there are some cats who like water, many of us own felines that can turn into “spawns of Satan” when it is bath time. So, when one has to enter Satan's Hell to wash a cat, keep these tips in mind: (Have no fear!)
1. It is wise to be organized beforehand by putting out shampoo, wash cloths, three absorbent towels, your cat's favorite treat and a non-skid mat in the tub. The mat is ofter overlooked, but do not make this mistake because when your cat is trying to slip through your hands like a fish, the mat can act as an extra hand to grip the slippery feline.
2. Lure the unsuspecting cat into the wash area by using all your wily talents. I personally have had success by distracting the cat with either wet cat food or cat nip, then grabbing and putting it in a bear hug till I can get to the bathroom and shut the door.
3. Get a helper, preferably one with no