Judeo Christian's Journey To Calvary: Humility
Around the globe this week, millions will celebrate Holy Week, a time each year that Christians commemorate the suffering and death of Jesus Christ. In the spirit of Holy Week, it is fitting to explore a virtue exemplified by this most perfect of all leaders on His journey to Calvary: humility.
Humility comes from the Latin word, humilitas, meaning lowliness or submissiveness, and humus, of the earth. In the Judeo Christian tradition the word came to have two distinct but wholly connected meanings related to a person having a modest sense of his own self-worth or said in a person wholly aware of his own defects and faults: First, vertical humility which is necessary to remove pride, the primary obstacle to our faith not just in God but in others. …show more content…
Our ability to trust is in proportion to our willingness to be open to others. Humility is the lubricant of trust. And, second, horizontal humility which is our capacity to submit ourselves to the feedback or guidance of our equals or inferiors because that person is superior in some way.
Humility has two opposites: first, the obvious and aforementioned one: Pride.
And the less obvious opposite: pampering the pride in others as a way of ingratiating oneself. In other words, a suck up or sycophant; one who overly subordinates himself to another to appear humble when, in fact, he or she seeks their favor.
Consider these 4 ways to understand real humility and avoid false humility:
1. Humility is other centered
There is a story of a young man rushing down the stairs of Capitol building and barreling over the Abraham Lincoln sending the new President sprawling on the floor. Unaware of who he had just ran over, the young man yelled, “watch where you are going you big buffoon!” The new President’s sense of humility was revealed in his response, “What is troubling you young man?”
Notice the reaction of the President is not one of anger at being thrown to the floor or humiliation at being talked down to. Instead, Lincoln focused on the reality of the other person’s situation. So in this sense, a person can humiliate another by inflicting pain but we can only humiliate ourselves due to excessive pride in our position or status. Perhaps that is why Mother Teresa said that humiliation (the injury we feel from being humiliated) can be a path to real humility.
2. Cultivate the comfort of accepting criticism by seeking it (and accepting
it!)
Whenever anyone subjects himself out of humility to an equal or to an inferior he does so because he takes that equal or inferior to be his superior in some respect.
I once observed a CEO listen attentively and respectfully to an angry customer—a plumber—who was well below him in economic status but in that moment the CEO saw that customer as his superior in knowledge of and experience with his company’s products. In other words (regardless of status), the CEO saw that customer as his superior. That was true humility.
In my profession of coaching, the degree of self-improvement a leader is in direct relationship to his or her willingness to seek to feedback from their team, peers and superiors. Leadership and executive coaches often use a series of feedback instruments called 360s to provide direct feedback from subordinates, peers and superiors. The good news in my experience is that when a leader submits to this kind of feedback despite the humiliation they might feel, they demonstrate their true open-mindedness to how others see or perceive the leader.
3. Don’t seek to be humble (say what?)
No, really, listen to sages of history. In the Jewish moral tradition, attempts to become more humble are “always self-defeating.” Think about it. To take pride in one’s humility is a pathetic craving for attention. Eventually, pride cannot be constrained by the false mask or covert façade of appearing humble while secretly wanting the honor of being called humble.
The real mark of a humble person is one who knows his or her own self-worth yet also knows that temptation will take him to a place beyond his limits. Don’t seek to be vulnerable as an end. Simply be open. Just be real.
In a sense, real humility is knowing one’s real limits which is avoiding the temptation where seduction begins. In the Judeo Christian tradition, only God knows our true worth. We only see the shadows of our self unless we permit humility to let in the light on our faults, failures and sins and truly avoid seeking the limelight we may secretly crave.
4. Instead, turn your focus to what’s really important: the true and the good.
Some years ago, Jim Collins wrote a book, Good to Great, that became very popular. In chapter __, he advocates that a Level 5 Leader is someone who blends genuine personal humility with intense professional will, a powerfully ambiguous mix that was appealing to millions of eager leadership students.
But the subtle unintentional mistake in Collins exalting of humility is not humility itself but a failure to relate it to other governing virtues like Justice. In other words we need humility in order to practice higher virtues needed to lead. Even as he claimed his research supported his findings, Collins never defined humility or the data that led to his conclusion. He was simply an astute observer of these leaders’ success.
If leaders focus first on doing real good; i.e., making sound judgments about people and things; treating others fairly; role modelling proper risk taking (courage) and making properly harmonizing a variety of goods (moderation) then humility is going to flourish
Better to heed the wisdom of C.S. Lewis who said, “True humility is not thinking less of yourself, it is thinking of yourself less.” Instead of asking yourself, “how can I demonstrate more humility with my team,” ask: “how can I help my team get to the good?” Only then, when you shift your focus from showing what a great – or should I say humble? – leader you are to actually leading your group toward excellence.
There you have it (in my humble opinion… oops, I just slipped into a moment of false humility)… okay, don’t listen to me (there I go again, another example of false humility… you’re reading this article after all…)
Let’s wrap up with an analogy to consider. Think of humility like the foundation or basement of a house. You need it to support the higher habits of excellence. But a powerful force, pride, in two forms seeks to two entry points to seep into or strike at the house. First, pride enters like water and slowly crumbles the cement and stone and one day the foundation collapses. Pride has another entry point to your house. Humility is attractive to others. A glow emanates from a person’s very core and shines forth. Unfortunately, that glow attracts pride, so the truly humble person installs a lightning rod at the very peak of his house so that those seductive temptations (lightning strikes) by which pride masquerades are sent through the house right to the basement to be dissipated.
And, if you are lucky, someday at your funeral during a testimonial or eulogy, a friend or family member might point to your example of humility. Or, they might simply say, she was a good person.
Have a Happy Easter!
Humility comes from the Latin word, humilitas, meaning lowliness or submissiveness, and humus, of the earth. In the Judeo Christian tradition the word came to have two distinct but wholly connected meanings related to a person having a modest sense of his own self-worth or said in a person wholly aware of his own defects and faults: First, vertical humility which is necessary to remove pride, the primary obstacle to our faith not just in God but in others. …show more content…
Our ability to trust is in proportion to our willingness to be open to others. Humility is the lubricant of trust. And, second, horizontal humility which is our capacity to submit ourselves to the feedback or guidance of our equals or inferiors because that person is superior in some way.
Humility has two opposites: first, the obvious and aforementioned one: Pride.
And the less obvious opposite: pampering the pride in others as a way of ingratiating oneself. In other words, a suck up or sycophant; one who overly subordinates himself to another to appear humble when, in fact, he or she seeks their favor.
Consider these 4 ways to understand real humility and avoid false humility:
1. Humility is other centered
There is a story of a young man rushing down the stairs of Capitol building and barreling over the Abraham Lincoln sending the new President sprawling on the floor. Unaware of who he had just ran over, the young man yelled, “watch where you are going you big buffoon!” The new President’s sense of humility was revealed in his response, “What is troubling you young man?”
Notice the reaction of the President is not one of anger at being thrown to the floor or humiliation at being talked down to. Instead, Lincoln focused on the reality of the other person’s situation. So in this sense, a person can humiliate another by inflicting pain but we can only humiliate ourselves due to excessive pride in our position or status. Perhaps that is why Mother Teresa said that humiliation (the injury we feel from being humiliated) can be a path to real humility.
2. Cultivate the comfort of accepting criticism by seeking it (and accepting
it!)
Whenever anyone subjects himself out of humility to an equal or to an inferior he does so because he takes that equal or inferior to be his superior in some respect.
I once observed a CEO listen attentively and respectfully to an angry customer—a plumber—who was well below him in economic status but in that moment the CEO saw that customer as his superior in knowledge of and experience with his company’s products. In other words (regardless of status), the CEO saw that customer as his superior. That was true humility.
In my profession of coaching, the degree of self-improvement a leader is in direct relationship to his or her willingness to seek to feedback from their team, peers and superiors. Leadership and executive coaches often use a series of feedback instruments called 360s to provide direct feedback from subordinates, peers and superiors. The good news in my experience is that when a leader submits to this kind of feedback despite the humiliation they might feel, they demonstrate their true open-mindedness to how others see or perceive the leader.
3. Don’t seek to be humble (say what?)
No, really, listen to sages of history. In the Jewish moral tradition, attempts to become more humble are “always self-defeating.” Think about it. To take pride in one’s humility is a pathetic craving for attention. Eventually, pride cannot be constrained by the false mask or covert façade of appearing humble while secretly wanting the honor of being called humble.
The real mark of a humble person is one who knows his or her own self-worth yet also knows that temptation will take him to a place beyond his limits. Don’t seek to be vulnerable as an end. Simply be open. Just be real.
In a sense, real humility is knowing one’s real limits which is avoiding the temptation where seduction begins. In the Judeo Christian tradition, only God knows our true worth. We only see the shadows of our self unless we permit humility to let in the light on our faults, failures and sins and truly avoid seeking the limelight we may secretly crave.
4. Instead, turn your focus to what’s really important: the true and the good.
Some years ago, Jim Collins wrote a book, Good to Great, that became very popular. In chapter __, he advocates that a Level 5 Leader is someone who blends genuine personal humility with intense professional will, a powerfully ambiguous mix that was appealing to millions of eager leadership students.
But the subtle unintentional mistake in Collins exalting of humility is not humility itself but a failure to relate it to other governing virtues like Justice. In other words we need humility in order to practice higher virtues needed to lead. Even as he claimed his research supported his findings, Collins never defined humility or the data that led to his conclusion. He was simply an astute observer of these leaders’ success.
If leaders focus first on doing real good; i.e., making sound judgments about people and things; treating others fairly; role modelling proper risk taking (courage) and making properly harmonizing a variety of goods (moderation) then humility is going to flourish
Better to heed the wisdom of C.S. Lewis who said, “True humility is not thinking less of yourself, it is thinking of yourself less.” Instead of asking yourself, “how can I demonstrate more humility with my team,” ask: “how can I help my team get to the good?” Only then, when you shift your focus from showing what a great – or should I say humble? – leader you are to actually leading your group toward excellence.
There you have it (in my humble opinion… oops, I just slipped into a moment of false humility)… okay, don’t listen to me (there I go again, another example of false humility… you’re reading this article after all…)
Let’s wrap up with an analogy to consider. Think of humility like the foundation or basement of a house. You need it to support the higher habits of excellence. But a powerful force, pride, in two forms seeks to two entry points to seep into or strike at the house. First, pride enters like water and slowly crumbles the cement and stone and one day the foundation collapses. Pride has another entry point to your house. Humility is attractive to others. A glow emanates from a person’s very core and shines forth. Unfortunately, that glow attracts pride, so the truly humble person installs a lightning rod at the very peak of his house so that those seductive temptations (lightning strikes) by which pride masquerades are sent through the house right to the basement to be dissipated.
And, if you are lucky, someday at your funeral during a testimonial or eulogy, a friend or family member might point to your example of humility. Or, they might simply say, she was a good person.
Have a Happy Easter!