Kenya Institute of Professional Counselling

Introduction
There is increase in issues relating g to the abuse of children in our societies. Due to this unfolding, the role of the government of Australia in formulating policies that will protect the child has also increased. Child abuse and its problems have a very great impact on all corners of the society including recreation and sporting activities. However, it was just recent that this government concern was translated into programs that are systematic and structured to help in alleviating this problem for the society. According to McIntosh (2002), a lot of articles and documents have been written regarding to neglect and child abuse and the actions that ought to be taken to stop this habit before it gets out of hand.
The wood royal commission In NSW led to the sensitization of the community on how the issue of child sexual abuse has become rampant in the society. In addition to this, the need for coming up with a development and implementation strategy to make sure that the children are protected from situations that ay be abusive was highlighted. The children 's protection is a responsibility that should be treated with the seriousness it deserves. The strategies put in place are geared towards ensuring that the children are protected and ensuring that child abuse is prevented and alleviated from the society (Holzer & Lamont, 2009).
Sexual Abuse among the Children in NSW
The strategies enacted will ensure that guidelines are enforced to present the children with a safe and an environment that is safe. In addition tot his; the community service providers are presented with essential risk management tools that can be beneficial in developing and organizing preventive strategies and how to manage the issues of child abuse effectively. Despite there being differences in the way matters are addressed in the eight different jurisdictions of Australia, the understanding of what child abuse is consistent in all the states (Cossins, 2000).
Child abuse has been divided into four main categories, sexual abuse, physical abuse emotional abuse and neglect. The police is bestowed with the mandated of ensuring that the rights of the children are respected. In addition to this, there are clear guidelines that have been put into place to ensure that any crime that is related to the abuse of children is adhered to when investigating them. Similarly to investigating, there are various procedures and steps that should be followed in bring the people who have committed these offences to justice.
The state and its territorial governments in Australia are liable to administer and carry out operations related to child protection. There are a number of legislatives that are present in each state and territory which are supposed to govern how these essential services are offered. In New South Wales, the children and young persons act of 1998 is employed in offering protection to the children. In addition to this, there are other acts that are considered relevant as far as child sexual abuse is concerned. These are Children and Young Persons (Care and Protection) Amendment (Parental Responsibility Contracts) Act 2006 (NSW), The Ombudsman Act 1974 (NSW), Commission for Children and Young People Act 1998 (NSW) and the Family Law Act 1975 (Cth).
The legislations that have been enacted by New South Wales are structured in a way that the best interests of the children are put at heart and addressed by all the responsible institutions. The legislations ensures that matters concerning the children are given the serious address that they deserve, this is by involving the children and young persons to make decisions in matter that affect them. The children and the young people in Australian jurisdictions are supposed to be consulted when dealing with issues that will affect them in one way or the other (NSW police force. 2011).
Being a signatory to the United Nations, Australia embeds most of the conventions present in the UN conventions on the rights of a child of 1986 and majority of the principles present in this convention have been embedded within the Australian child protection legislation. In conjunction to the policy structures that depict the extent, nature and ways in which the services are offered within its boundaries are used to decide on how the legislative processes are to be carried out. In a study carried out by NSW Police Force. (2011), it was found out that the legislative procedures reflected highly on the goals and services that the government works towards to in offering its services. Similar to these studies, other studies found out that the services offered by different Australian states differed greatly in relation to the needs of the different states. Despite these differences, legislation in all the states possessed similar principle guidelines on how the services were being administered (McIntosh, 2002).
In case of a child being sexually abused, the New South Wales states requires legal mandatory reporting to be made. The state has enlisted a list of people who occupy specific positions who are supposed to make these reports to the respective authorities (Parkinson, 2003). Counselors, court personnel and mediators are required by the legislation to make report reports and allegations of child abuse to licensed child care providers and family courts. As of the 1st of January, 2009, the legislation that was concerned with ensuring that mandatory child abuse was reported in community and children services was amended into the children and community act of 2004. This ensured that the personnel who were authorized to make any possible reports regarding children sexual abuse was extended to include nurses, teachers, doctors, police officers and midwives. It was believed that this group of people was at a better position of knowing whether a child has been or is being subjected to sexual abuse (Swain & Rice, 2009).
Conclusion
According to a study by Holzer & Lamont (2009) it was noted that child sexual abuse was not distributed randomly in the society. Most of the reports that had been made regarding sexually abused children were amongst those children from families that are deprived and whose backgrounds are said to be disorganized. Dysfunctions in marital status as identified by Cossins (2000) indicated cases where divorce and various cases in domestic violence have been associated with high instances of sexual child abuse cases. In addition to this cases of intrafamiilal and extrafamilial perpetrations have been seen as playing a part in the increase of child abuse sexually. Similarly, the relationship between the child and the parent matters a lot.
A poor relationship and attachment can increase sexual abuse cases among children. When children are exposed to one form of abuse, the likelihood of the same children suffering and being exposed to the other abuses is very high. However this does not imply that a child who is emotionally disturbed or abused may end up suffering sexually. The state is owed with providing security and safety to children who have suffered sexually. In this relation, there are two specific classes of policies that are aimed at reducing and stopping cases associated with child sexual abuse (Swain & Rice, 2009). The two are provision of referral services to clients to support them in pursuing for justice and using statutory guidelines and responses in supporting the already existing frameworks.
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Jennie Dalcour
Jennie Dalcour began writing Internet content in 2009. She has worked several years in the telecommunications industry and in sales and marketing. She has spent many years teaching young children and has spent over four years writing curriculum for churches. She is now pursuing a Masters of Arts in clinical psychology at Regent University and has ample experience with special needs children.
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By Jennie Dalcour, eHow Contributor * * * * Print this article
Writing about the effects of abuse takes time and organizational skills.
Although research papers are often challenging, writing about a serious topic adds its own difficulties. The effects of childhood sexual abuse on children is a weighty topic to research and write. By researching specific types of effects and organizing your information, you can streamline the writing process. Strong organizational skills will help you stay focused and maintain the flow of your research paper.
Other People Are Reading * Research Paper Ideas About Child Abuse * How to Write a Thesis Statement About Child Abuse
Instructions
1. * 1
Research the important themes in your topic. Go to your library or your school 's online electronic library database to learn about the effects of childhood sexual abuse. Research both the short- and long-term effects of abuse on children. Princeton University 's publication "The Future of Children" reports that abused children suffer posttraumatic stress, cognitive distortions, emotional distress, a distorted self-concept, avoidance and relationship difficulties. * 2
Develop a thesis statement. A thesis statement is a summary sentence that can guide you as you write the paper. Include the main issues you will be discussing. * * 3
Write an outline based on your research, while following the flow of your thesis statement. Organize the ideas you will write about in topics. (see ref 3) Each topic will have subtopics that include research to support your idea. Arrange your topics by immediate and long-term consequence and by severity of the effect on the children. For instance, you can place posttraumatic stress under your first topic because it is an immediate effect and may be severe. Relationship difficulties are a long-term consequence and will be toward the end of the outline. * 4
Write a rough draft. Use your outline as a guide and start writing. Include in-text citations as you type to cite the sources of your information. * 5
Wait 24 hours after you write your first draft. Read your paper aloud to catch any mistakes or problems with the flow of the writing. Edit any grammatical problems and rewrite sections that need more clarity. Make sure you have included facts about sexual abuse in the introduction and the effects. * 6
Proofread your paper one more time. Add the references you used in the reference page at the end of your paper.

Read more: How to write a research paper on Effects of Childhood Sexual Abuse on Children | eHow.com http://www.ehow.com/how_5726235_write-childhood-sexual-abuse-children.html#ixzz2LX4tX9zy

Instructions 1. * 1
Brainstorm topic ideas. The general topic of child abuse is far too broad for a paper, and such a general topic will make it difficult to conduct adequate research and establish a pointed argument in your paper. Think about different areas within the topic of child abuse that you can discuss. For example, you can investigate the emotional impact of child abuse or the long-term effects on victims of such abuse. * 2
Research your child abuse topic. Before you jump into writing your thesis statement, you want to conduct some research on the topic to ensure that plenty of information is available on your topic. Take notes as you read through books and articles about your research; these notes will help you as you write your thesis statement. * * 3
Choose an angle for your paper. A persuasive paper requires you to take a position on the topic. If you choose to write about resources available to child abuse victims, then your argument can be that added resources for current and past child abuse victims can help stop the abuse epidemic. * 4
Compose your thesis statement. The thesis statement should summarize the purpose of your paper in one sentence. Think about the main points of your child abuse paper, and include each of these main points in the thesis. Your previous research and focused topic will make identifying these main points easier. For example, if you are writing a paper about child abuse and socioeconomic status, your thesis could be, "Rates of child abuse in poor communities increase as a result of increased stress, lack of familial support and lower education levels," if your research points to this.

Read more: How to Write a Thesis Statement About Child Abuse | eHow.com http://www.ehow.com/how_8334103_write-thesis-statement-child-abuse.html#ixzz2LX73WMEe The problem of child sexual abuse has attracted a great deal of attention in recent years. The American media have reported numerous cases in which persons in positions of trust—including day care providers, clergymen, and scout leaders—have been accused (and in some cases convicted) of molesting children under their care. Many of these charges have been made by adults who claim to have recovered repressed memories of abuse they were subjected to as children. Other widely reported stories have involved children being abused—and sometimes murdered—by convicted child molesters newly released from prison. In addition, pedophiles have reportedly lured child victims into abusive situations via the Internet. Commentators point to such developments as evidence that the problem of child sexual abuse in the United States is alarmingly serious.
On the other hand, some researchers and social critics, while agreeing that child sexual abuse is a horrendous crime, maintain that the extent of the problem has been exaggerated due to various causes. Media critics contend that intensive reporting of a few sensational cases has created a sense of panic among the public. Others question the validity of the recovered memories that are the basis of many child abuse accusations. In addition, the victimization of children, society’s most vulnerable members, automatically provokes intense anger among parents and concerned citizens who demand action on the part of law enforcement. While such outrage is natural and understandable, some commentators argue that the public’s response to recent developments has been excessive and has created the impression that the problem is worse than it actually is.
Varying estimates
This debate remains unresolved in part because it is impossible to determine the exact extent of the problem. Experts believe that most cases of child sexual abuse are never reported to authorities. In fact, the FBI has estimated that only 1 percent to 10 percent of child sexual abuse cases are reported to the police. Children often do not report being sexually abused because they are ashamed, are afraid of repercussions, or are reluctant to betray their abusers. In addition, many reports of child sexual abuse are never substantiated, either because they are unfounded or because they cannot be proven. Child sexual abuse cases are frequently difficult to prove due to a lack of physical evidence (especially if the abuse is reported a significant period of time after it occurred) or due to unreliable testimony by the child victim. For these reasons, estimates of the prevalence of child sexual abuse vary wildly. Ann Wolbert Burgess and Christine A. Grant of the University of Pennsylvania School of Nursing report that in nine scientific studies they reviewed, the prevalence of sexual abuse ranged from 6 percent to 62 percent for girls and from 3 percent to 31 percent for boys.
Some researchers contend that the high estimates of child sexual abuse reported by a number of studies are exaggerated, due in part to overreporting by professionals who work with children. Current law requires those who supervise or treat children, such as teachers and doctors, to report any and all possible cases of child abuse to law enforcement authorities. These professionals are immune from prosecution if they make mistaken allegations but are liable for criminal penalties if they fail to report a case. This “mandated reporting,” according to Richard A. Gardner, a clinical professor of child psychiatry at Columbia University, has resulted in “overreporting of even the most absurd and impossible allegations.” Gardner and other critics of mandated reporting laws maintain that this overreporting by professionals has led to inflated statistics on child sexual abuse.
Critics contend that the problem of overreporting is compounded by the manner in which reports are handled by child protection agencies and investigators. Social workers are frequently accused of being too eager to believe charges of abuse, to remove children from their homes, and to subject parents to intensive scrutiny. In addition, child protection officials have received a great deal of criticism for their performance in a number of highly publicized child sexual abuse cases, such as the Mc- Martin Preschool case in Manhattan Beach, California, in which two defendants were tried and subsequently acquitted on charges of molesting dozens of children. According to K.L. Billingsly, a fellow at the Center for Popular Culture, videotaped interviews with the children in that case revealed that therapists used “coercive methods” and “manipulated the children into making false accusations.” Critics point to this and similar cases to substantiate their assertion that child protective service agencies are overly zealous in their investigation and prosecution of child sexual abuse accusations, thereby exaggerating the scope of the problem.
Underreported and lightly prosecuted
Many others counter that child sexual abuse is an underreported problem. As noted previously, most experts agree that the majority of cases of abuse are never reported by the victim. Moreover, the National Center for Prosecution of Child Abuse disputes the contention that professionals overreport abuse. The center maintains that many of those who are mandated to report suspected abuse “do not report serious cases because they do not believe the child protection or legal systems will follow up the case effectively.” In short, according to the center, professionals are underreporting rather than overreporting the problem of child sexual abuse.
Moreover, many commentators defend child protective service agencies against claims that they are too eager to believe reports of child sexual abuse. According to the National Center for Prosecution of Child Abuse, “Up to 60% of child sexual abuse reports are not even believed.” The center also rejects the argument that child sexual abuse cases are investigated and prosecuted with excessive zeal. Due to the difficulty in proving such charges, according to the center, “suspects arrested for sexual offenses against children are less likely to be prosecuted than other violent offenders.” In one study of sexual abuse allegations in day care centers, 82 percent of the charges were dismissed, the center reports. The center also notes that those convicted of child sexual abuse are given relatively light sentences; only 19 percent receive sentences of more than one year.
Disagreement regarding the reporting and prosecution of child sexual abuse cases reflects deeper dissension about the extent of the problem in American society. The contributors to At Issue: Child Sexual Abuse examine the prevalence of child sexual abuse, the reliability of recovered memories of abuse, the seriousness of the problem of child abuse committed by other children, and whether priests who have molested children can be reintegrated into society. By focusing on these issues, the authors in this anthology confront one of the most disturbing and destructive crimes that society faces—the sexual violation of children. Child Sexual Abuse ALL 2/11/04 12:07 PM Page 8
Child Sexual Abuse, ©1998 Gale Cengage. All Rights Reserved. Full copyright.

Some Tips on How to Protect
Your Child from Sexual Abuse

© 2009 Pandora 's Project
By: Katy

As survivors, we are perhaps even more acutely aware of the need to protect our children from sexual abuse (CSA). However, our personal knowledge of the horrors of child sexual abuse does not necessarily mean that we are any better equipped to teach our children about child safety or to identify the warning signs of sexual abuse in children. In fact, many of us are so worried about “history repeating itself” that our anxiety gets in the way, and we either avoid the subject altogether and keep our fingers crossed – or we become very overprotective and try to wrap our children in so much cotton wool that they are not given the skills to protect themselves.

This article is intended to give you some ideas about how to protect your children from sexual abuse.

Why do you need to know about this? This couldn 't happen to your child, right??
“It 's not denial. I 'm just selective about the reality I accept.”

Unfortunately, ANY child is at risk of sexual abuse. Hoping... denying.... pretending.... that this can 't happen to your child is not lowering your child 's risk of being sexually abused, and it does not prepare them to get help quickly and effectively if the worst does happen.

The reality of CSA is a terrifying concept - but its something that every parent needs to face because knowledge is power.

The Facts:

The stark reality of the statistics is that approximately 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys are sexually abused before the age of 18 and it can affect any child regardless of age, gender, family income, culture, race, religion, physical appearance, sexuality, intellect, disability etc.

Most sexual abuse (85%) is perpetrated someone within the child 's social sphere - for example, a relative, a family friend, a teacher, youth worker, religious leader, neighbour. Despite the stereotypical image of the abuser propagated by the media, abusers usually do not look like monsters and it is relatively rare for them to be strangers.

The majority of children never report the abuse, and often this is because they are afraid of their parents’ reactions, because they fear getting in trouble, or because they don 't know how to tell. The child who keeps the abuse secret is more likely to experience severe physical and emotional consequences, both in childhood and later in life.

Children from a young as three years old can be taught skills that lower their vulnerability of sexual abuse and which also increase their ability to tell if something does happen. You, as the parent, play the most vital role in educating your child about their safety and about what 's right and wrong. Similarly, you have a big role to play in identifying risk factors and signs in order to aid prevention and detection of abuse.

What is child sexual abuse (CSA)?
"Sexual abuse is when a child or young person is pressurised, forced or tricked into taking part in any kind of sexual activity with an adult or young person" (NSPCC) * CSA can involve many activities including: * Fondling / touching / kissing of genitals or other area 's of the body. * Penetration with penis, digit, or object. * Exposing genitals or sexual material to a child. * Talking to a child inappropriately, graphically, and explicitly about sex. * Asking a child to touch their own genitals or another persons. * Non-forced sex with an underage child.

Myths about CSA
“The great enemy of the truth is very often not the lie - deliberate, contrived and dishonest - but the myth - persistent, persuasive and unrealistic” (JFK)
There are so many myths around child sexual abuse that it’s difficult to know where to start. On the whole, many of us believe these myths....because it’s comforting! If we believe that we can identify a paedophile from across the street then we can keep our children away from them. If we believe that CSA only happens within "problem families" then we can be secure in that knowledge that our children are safe because we 're "a normal family".

It’s important to identify the myths so that you can reject them as unhelpful and look to the more useful and viable information that really can make a difference. ALL of these statements are incorrect and should be rejected: * Myth: Only pretty little girls are sexually abused. * Myth: All molesters look like dirty old men. You can just tell. * Myth: Mostly child abusers are strangers. * Myth: Only men really rape children. * Myth: My child would tell me if anything like this happened to them. * Myth: This could never happen to my child. * Myth: Sexual abusers are monsters and just look evil. * Myth: Teaching about CSA scares children, so its best to keep quiet. * Myth: If my child had been abused, I would just know. * Myth: Only homosexual men hurt little boys. * Myth: It can 't happen in my family. * Myth: Sexual abuse is a family matter and should be dealt with as such.
WHAT CAN YOU DO??

Teach your children the proper names for parts of the body:

Even as adults, many of us get embarrassed about naming areas of our body - and more often that not, we may refer to our genitals as out "private parts" or "down there" or "the lady area"! I 'm sure we all have our own pet names for these areas - I, for example, was taught to call my vagina my "Merry Christmas", and my brother was taught to call his penis his "didler"!

But what 's wrong with teaching children the proper names for their body parts? By teaching a child the proper names for their body parts, they will be in a position to name what 's happening to them should someone touch them in an abusive way. By using the proper terms, everybody will be in a position to know exactly what they are referring to, and minimizing the chance of misinterpretation. For example, its far less confusing if a child is able to say "He touched my vagina with his penis" than it is if she said, "He touched my Merry Christmas with his didler"!.

By not referring to the sexual organs at all, or by referring to them as their "private parts", this can have implications for what a child thinks is okay and not okay to talk about. Teaching them in an open way from a very young age about correct biological labels will help children to feel that its not taboo or embarrassing to talk about their sexual organs if there is a need to - and obviously in an abusive situation, this can be the difference between telling and not telling about abuse.

Resources for learning about the body:
Amazing You!: Getting Smart About Your Private Parts by Gail Saltz
My Body Is Private by Linda Girard
"What 's Happening to My Body" Book for Girls, by Lynda Madaras
"What 's Happening to My Body" Book for Boys, by Lynda Madaras

Safe Touch / Unsafe Touch

The number one fundamental rule is to teach children that there body belongs to them! They had a right to decide what they do with their body, and who touches their body, and how someone touches their body. They need to be afforded the same rights as we are.

Teach your child to respect their body 's by teaching them to respect other people 's body 's. Children need to be told not to do something to anyone else that that person doesn 't want. For example, if they are jumping up and down on you, you can say "I don 't want you to jump up and down on me. Please stop." Similarly if they are tickling a sibling, that sibling should be able to say "Stop it" - and ensure your child respects this. Modeling and absolute rules make this easier for children to understand.

Respect their wishes - and let them know that no one, not even you, has the right to touch them without their say so. Ask your child before touching them i.e. "Would you like me to help you with you shoes?". Don 't just assume its okay. Ask them for a goodnight kiss - don 't demand one! Don 't make them kiss any relative they don 't want to - and teach them to say politely "I don 't feel like kissing right now". * Talk to them about "What is GOOD touch?".
Good touch is touch that feels safe - or touch that makes us feel warm and make us smile. Its touch that makes us feel cared for. Try to explain to children that some good touch actually hurts i.e. cleaning a cut - but that its good because its making them better. * Talk to them about "What is BAD touch?"
Bad touch is touch which hurts their body of feelings. For example, if someone kicks you or pushes you. * Talk to them about "What is UNWANTED touch?"
Unwanted touch may be touch which would usually be good touch, but something which you do not want right now. For example, being swung in the air may usually be fun, but after a big meal, they might not want it. * Talk to them about "What is SEXUAL ABUSE touch?"
Calling it sexual abuse touch makes it clear that this is a totally different type of touch - and it does not confuse the issue by using incorrect terminology. Sexual abuse touch is touch that makes the child feel scared, anxious or uncertain on any part of their body that would normally be covered if they wore a swimming costume - or touching someone else on any part of the body that would normally be covered if they wore a swimming costume. Explain to them that this touch may feel "nice" or exciting, but that it may also feel strange. If they are asked not to tell anyone about this touch then that is sexual abuse touch. Make it clear that sexual abuse touch can also happen if they are touched with their clothes on - i.e. if someone rubs them over their pants.

When you touch your child, ask them to tell you what type of touch it is. Ask questions like "Right now, would it be okay if an adult touched you on the hand?" and "Right now, would it be okay if an adult touched you on your tummy?". Try to encourage them to explain their answers.
Safe Touch Resources:

God Made Me: The Safe Touch Coloring Book by Beth Robinson
The Right Touch: A Read-Aloud Story to Help Prevent Child Sexual Abuse by Sandy Kleven

Saying "NO!"

From an early age, children are taught allegiance to adults and to "Do as you 're told!", and certainly very young children can find it difficult to differentiate between rules they have to follow, and rules they don 't have to follow.

Teach your child that they have the right to say NO! As the majority of child abuse is based on coersion rather than force, teaching your child to say NO! strongly and forcefully really can make a big difference in many situations. Children will need practice how to say "NO!" in this way, and so its a good idea to practice this with them. You can make a game of it.....it doesn 't have to be frightening for them.....but it could help to give them the confidence to say "NO!" if someone tries to abuse them.

Obviously there are times that children are not permitted to say "no" and this is where the difficulty and confusion can occur. Make it clear to children that they have the right to say "no" to anyone who wants to touch their vagina, penis, breasts, buttocks - or anywhere that is normally covered if you put a swimming costume on. Make it clear that they have the right to say "NO!" loudly even if this is an adult and that they will not get into trouble. Tell children to trust their feelings and if something doesn 't feel okay - then say "NO!".

There may be times when someone may need to touch their body - i.e. a doctor during an examination - but make it clear that this is only okay if you are with them and if you say it is okay directly to them. You can explain that this is safe touch because it is to do with health.

You could play the "OK NO! game" with them where you come up with some scenario 's and ask them if it is okay to say "NO!" in these situations. Ask them to explain their answers. For example:

Is it okay to say NO if your mum asks you tidy your room?
Is it okay to say NO if your dad asks you to brush your teeth?
Is it okay to say NO if your uncle asks you to sit on his lap and you don’t want to?
Is it okay to say NO if your teacher touches your penis?
Is it okay to say NO if an adult pats you on the head?
Is it okay to say NO if an adult tickles your vagina, even if it feels nice?
Is it okay to say NO if an adult asks you to do something you feel is wrong?
Is it okay to say NO if an adult asks you to keep a secret from your parents?
Is it okay to say NO if an adult tells you to put your seatbelt on?
Is it okay to say NO if your sister asks you to touch her vagina?
Is it okay to say NO if your teacher asks you to pull down your pants to smack you if you 've been bad.

Making this into a game and checking it out with them regularly can help - and they can practice saying "NO!" at the same time. For older children, you may want to change this into the "WHAT IF...?" game - whereby you can make the scenario 's more complex which reflect the situations they may be confronted with.

Teach your children about "bad" secrets
“No one keeps a secret so well as a child” (Victor Hugo)

The majority of abusers teach their victims to keep what 's happening to them a secret. From young children, we teach our children not to tell tales.....to maintain trusts that are afforded to us....to not air our dirty laundry in public. It 's no wonder that children find it confusing!

Teach your child that any secret which makes them feel uneasy is a bad secret and its okay to break it. Any secret that makes them feel bad or sad or frightened is a bad secret and its okay to break it. Tell your child that any secret that they can 't tell you is a bad secret and its okay to break it. Be consistent! Children do not have to keep any promise that makes them feel bad inside.

Teach your child the difference between a secret and a surprise: A surprise is something you will be allowed to tell at a later stage; a secret is something you 're asked to never tell.

Bad Secrets Resources: 'The trouble with secrets ' Karen Johnsen
Secrets that Hurt: Sexual Abuse Activity Book, by Jim Boulden and Joan Boulden.
No More Secrets for Me, by Oralee Wachter and Jane Aaron. (2002). Little Brown & Company.

Watch out for warning signs in adults

Children display signs that all is not well, but there are signs which are displayed from the abusers themselves. Try to remember that abusers typically do not look how you would expect an abuser to look. Contrary to popular media stereotypes, they do not look like monsters, or the type of face that stares out of you from a mugshot. Abusers are good at gaining trust....that 's how they operate.....and therefore they can seem to be the nicest people...the most helpful...the most thoughtful....the most loving. Of course, don 't go around suspecting someone may be an abuser because they are nice and good! But the point is not to rule them out if you have suspicions because they display characteristics that you don 't feel are the typical monster-like features of a paedophile. * Watch for adults who:
Refuse children privacy or invade their privacy.
Insist on physical affection even when the child looks uncomfortable.
Insist on “special time” alone from other adults and children.
Spend a lot of time with children instead of adults.
Buy children expensive gifts for no apparent reason.
Appear to put a lot of effort into getting close to children.
Have had previous allegations against them before.
Make you feel uneasy.....even if you can 't put your finger on why.
Your child or other children seem afraid of.
Your child or other children do not want to be alone with. * Question people who are trusted to look after your children and monitor.
Ask any organizations about criminal background checks and professional recommendations / references.
Ask about training of staff / policies if suspected abuse.
If a child seems uncomfortable, or resistant to being with a particular adult, ask them why. Be persistent.
If an adult is taking a child on an outing, make sure to get specifics of it. Ensure they know that you are the type of parent that asks questions!
Always make a point of asking your child about their day. Use open questions, and be persistent if they seem reluctant to give answers.
Think about whether activities would be preferable in a group. Ask why something it one-to-one.

“Molesters Do Not Wear an Ugly Mask. They Wear A Shield of Trust.”
- Patty Rase Hopson

Stranger - Danger

Although the vast majority of risks to your child do not come from strangers, it is vital that you teach your children about stranger danger. Some remarkably simple techniques can help your child to keep themselves safe!

Help your child to identify a stranger. When you are out and about - ask your child "Are they a stranger?". Make it clear that just because you may know the persons face, they could still be a stranger (i.e. lady who works in the shop!).
Tell your child never to talk to strangers unless they are with an adult they trust and never to go anywhere with a stranger. Identify trusted adults.
If a stranger approaches them and asks them to go somewhere with them - teach your child to MAKE A FUSS. Tell them to make a noise, runaway to somewhere where there are a lot of people, scream etc.
Tell someone as soon as possible!
YELL, RUN, TELL!!

Teach your child their own address and phone number. Make sure they have another number of another trusted adult written down somewhere that they can keep with them.
If you go somewhere where you may become separated from your child, have a "meet place" i.e. by the fountain.
By them a travelcard (if old enough) and a phonecard for emergencies.
Make sure they know how to dial the emergency services and what to say.
Have a "safe" word if you are unable to pick your child up. Make sure your child knows not to go with the adult if the safe word isn 't know.
Teach your child the buddy system - i.e. walk in pairs or groups.

Resources for Stranger Danger:

Stranger Danger coloring page to download
Safest with a buddy coloring page download.

Stranger Danger by P. Pancella.
Stranger Danger: The Reluctantly Written but Absolutely Necessary Book for Todays Boys And Girls!By Patricia Stirnkorb
Stranger Danger: How to Keep Your Child SafeBy Carol Soret Cope
Safe at Home with Pooh (Disney 's My Very First Winnie the Pooh)By Kathleen Weidner Zoehfeld

Internet Activity

Its a very scary statistic, but 1 in 5 children have been sexually solicited on the internet, and 1 in 2 have been exposed to sexually explicit material on the internet. Children of today are generally very computer literate, often more so that we are, and although the internet can be a valuable resource, it can also be a dangerous hunting ground for paedophiles to make contact with children and teens.

Use a filter to block inappropriate material. Cookies can be disabled. For info on how to block certain content, please contact your ISP or see here.
Keep the computer in a shared family area and be around to monitor use.
Bookmark approved sites for young children and tell them to stick to these areas.
Spend time teaching your child how to use the internet.
Make a contract with your child about their internet use. For a standard contract see here.
Limit the amount of time that your child is permitted to spend online.
Block your child from being able to enter private unmoderated chat rooms. NEVER agree to meet anyone from a chat room.
Monitor your credit card and phone bills for unfamiliar account charges.
Report any obscene or threatening messages to your ISP.
Tell children NEVER to give out any personal information online, name, address, age, phone number, email, IM address, school, location, or photographs.
If your child has a new online "friend," insist on being "introduced" online to that friend.
If your child becomes secretive about online use, question why.

Resources:
Kidsmart
Wired Kids
Wired Safety
The Police Notebook.
How to block content

IF THE WORST SHOULD HAPPEN?

Let me get one thing clear. No matter what a wonderful parent you are, and no matter how well you have prepared your child for the risk of abuse - and equipped them in terms of child safety - sometimes child sexual abuse will happen anyway. You cannot be with your children ALL OF THE TIME. Its impossible. All you can do is lessen the risks - and, if the worst should happen, be in a position where you are able to identify the abuse as quickly as possible. Its a widely accepted belief among mental health experts that, on average, the longer the abuse continues, the worse the potential consequences for the physical and mental well-being of the victim. Similarly, the way that you react and deal with your childs ' abuse, can have an enormous impact upon their recovery.

Recognizing the signs of CSA
Please remember that children will only show some of these signs. Also these signs do not have to mean that your child has been abused. These are indications of possible abuse, but they are not fact. Its important to be aware, without jumping to invalid and unsubstantiated conclusions. A child who is being sexually abused may show the following: * Behaviour changes:
- Being excessively clinging or uncharacteristically crying when you try to leave them.
- Having difficulty sleeping; not wanting to go so bed; having nightmares or night-terrors; fear of the dark.
- Returning to previously immature behaviors i.e. sucking thumb, bed-wetting, needing teddy, soiling etc.
- Problems at school i.e. discipline issues, poor attention, change in working performance etc.
- Fear of a specific person or place. Isolating themselves.
- Being "too perfect" and too well behaved; quiet; desperate to please; over-achieving.
- Radical mood swings.
- Being evasive when asked questions, or having memory loss. * Health Issues:
- A change in eating habits i.e. eating too much / too little; purging; becoming a fussy eater.
- Incontinence.
- Self-destructive behavior i.e. head-banging, self harm, alcohol use, drugs, genital mutilation.
- Genital discomfort, bleeding, irritation, redness, thrush, itching, discharge, odour.
- Persistent urinary tract infections.
- General ill-health complaints i.e. chronic headache, stomach cramps, sore throat etc.
- Depression / anxiety / suicidal ideation. * Inappropriate sexual development / behavior:
- Excessive genital touching or masturbating in public.
- Non-age appropriate language i.e sexually graphic.
- Being sexually precocious and sexually suggestive.
- Hides secondary sexual characteristics i.e. covers up, wears baggy clothes, straps breasts.
- Attempts to be unattractive i.e. stops wearing make-up, stops washing, puts on weight.
- Fear of undressing or refusal to undress in gym class
- Initiate inappropriate sexual contact with other children.

What should I do if I suspect?

As hard as it may be, try to stay calm. Children look to their parents to know what to do, and if they see you freaking out, this is likely to increase their fear and uncertainty also.

IF you suspect - no matter how vague your suspicion - GET HELP! Don 't try to deal with this all by yourself because dealing with this in secrecy only exacerbates feelings of shame in your child. Of course, treat it with the sensitivity it deserves, but involve the experts right from the start. * REPORT IT:
The first step, even before you talk to your child, is to report your suspicions to your local child protection team - and let them investigate it. Of course your instinct may be to try to talk to your child yourself and get an admission from them - but in doing this you run the risk of eliciting a unsubstantiated disclosure which could make prosecution impossible. Furthermore, many children may be especially fearful of making the initial disclosure to a parent for fear of upsetting you, or making you angry, or disappointing you, and so they may be more likely to disclose to a professional. Your job at this time is to be the loving parent....letting them know that you still love them, that they are special, that you 're not angry etc. * Listen to your child and to what they say they need:
At this time, trust your child to know how they want you to help. The tendency of most parents is to want to make it all better...to "fix" what 's been done to them - and unfortunately, this is not something that can be fixed. Children can learn to come to terms with the hurt they 've experienced, but they have to do so at their own pace. Let them talk to you as much or as little as they want to. Don 't try to steam-roller them into disclosing all of the gory details to you unless they want to - and be sensitive to the fact that some children may prefer to talk to another trusted relative or a mental health professional. This is not a rejection of you. Make it clear that you are there to listen whenever or however they need. * Reassure your child:
Your child may have a lot of fears about what would happen if anyone found out about the abuse. Their abuser may have told them that no one would believe them, or that they would get in trouble, or that mummy wouldn 't love them anymore. Make it cleat from the beginning that you believe them. Make it clear that no matter what happened, this was not their fault. Reassure them that they have done the right thing in telling, and that you are very proud of them for being so brave. Let them know that you love them and always will. * Do not confront the perpetrator:
No matter how much you may want to, do not confront the perpetrator. Leave this for the professionals. Your energy, at this time, has to go into making your child feel safe and loved - and expending energy on the perp is going to limit your ability to do that. The child may have very mixed feelings about their abuser, especially if the abuser is a family member, and so seeing you get mad at them may make the child feel guilty and retract what 's happened. Confronting the abuser could also be dangerous for you because desperate people will do desperate things. And lastly, you could inadvertently warn them about any evidence against them. * GET HELP FOR YOURSELF:
The abuse of a child is one of the worst things that a parent can ever have to deal with. Its important that you get help for yourself because without it you are unlikely to be able to support your child in the way they need. There are support organizations for parents of abused children, and also your social services should be able to put you in contact with people who can help.

FOR MORE INFORMATION:

Websites:
Avoiding Sexual Dangers: A Parent 's Guide to Protecting your Child
Darkness to light
Child Help USA
Mothers of sexually abused children
Prevent Child Abuse
Love and Logic (Parenting website)
Kidscape
National Children 's Alliance
NSPCC

Helplines:

USA
Darkness to Light 's helpline on CSA Prevention 1-866-FOR-LIGHT
Childhelp USA National Child Abuse Hotline 1-800-4-A-CHILD.
The National Children 's Alliance 1-800-239-9950.
Prevent Child Abuse America 1.800.244.5373

UK
Childline (for kids) 0800 1111
NSPCC - to report abuse / get advice 0808 800 5000
Mosac - support non-abusing parents 0800 980 1958

Australia
Kids help line 1800 551 800
Parenting Line 1300 365 859

New Zealand
Kidsline - 0800 543 754
Parentline - 07 839 4536
WellStop - 04 566 4745

Parentline 1800 30 1300

For kids oz (1800 55 1800.
08081000900 Stopit now

WRITTEN RESOURCES

BOOKS FOR PARENTS:

Helping Your Child Recover from Sexual Abuse, by Caren Adams and Jennifer Fay.
A Parent 's and Teacher 's Handbook on Identifying and Preventing Child Abuse, by James A. Monteleone.
The Safe Child Book: a Commonsense Approach to Protecting Children and Teaching Children to Protect Themselves, by Sherryll Kraizer
A Better Safe than Sorry Book: a Family Guide for Sexual Assault Prevention, by Sol Gordon
Protecting the Gift: Keeping Children and Teenagers Safe (and Parents Sane) by Gavin De Becker .
Protecting Your Children on the Internet: A Road Map for Parents and Teachers by Gregory S. Smith
The Safe Child Book: A Commonsense Approach to Protecting Your Children from Abduction and Sexual Abuse by Sherryll Kerns Kraizer
Protect your child from Sexual Abuse: A Parents Guide by Janie Rossi.

FREE DOWNLOADS FOR PARENTS:

NSPCC Booklet: Protecting Children.
Stop-it-now: Preventing CSA leaflet
Keep your child safe booklet.

BOOKS FOR KIDS:

It Happens to Boys Too, by Jane Santullo and Russell Bradway. (1987).
A Terrible Thing Happened: A story for children who have witnessed violence or trauma by M. Holmes.
The Anxiety Workbook for Teens: Activities to Help You Deal With Anxiety & Worry by Lisa M. Schab
Girls: The Truth About Sexual Abuse--A Book for Teen Girls, Young Women, and Everyone Who Cares About Them by Patti Feuereisen
Secret: Sexual Assault Information for Teenagers Only, by Jennifer Fay and Billy Jo Fierchinger.
Its My Body by Lori Freeman.
Older People Surviving Child Sexual Abuse
2010 Pandora’s Aquarium
By: Louise

Note: While it 's true that some older survivors of child sexual abuse can have experiences that trigger a powerful resurgence of past trauma, this article is not meant to state that this will be the case for all. Rather, I hope it will be a comfort and offer support to older survivors who are experiencing a hard time with their pasts. You are not alone, and it is not hopeless. Introduction
It is well-documented by writers and researchers that there are times in the lives of abuse survivors when they will be more prone to thoughts and feelings about their histories. Circumstances that can instigate the re-opening of abuse-related wounds include pregnancy, a fresh encounter with sexual assault whether against the survivor or somebody close, children becoming the same age the survivor was at the time of their assault, or being in a safe relationship and no longer needing to merely survive. Another context for the arousal of early abuse-related trauma can be approaching, or having entered, middle-age. You may be a survivor of child sexual abuse who is now in your late thirties, forties, fifties or beyond, and you may be finding that your feelings around what you experienced are worse than they have ever been, or at any rate worse that they 've been for a long time. You may be confused as to why this is happening now. Life changing events such as medical scares, dying abusers, bereavement, retrenchment and ill spouses are things older survivors must often contend with. You may not expect such events to have triggered off earlier trauma, and you may be shocked and frightened by the strength of nightmares, flashbacks and other symptoms. Or perhaps there 's no precipitating event you can pinpoint as starting it all, but you 've found that you suddenly can 't stop thinking about what happened when you were younger. It may be that you 've retired, your kids have left home and life has fewer extraneous distractions. This can be a time when traumatic issues begin to clamour for attention. If this is you, please know that even if you feel anything but normal right now, what is happening to you is not at all unusual. This appears to be a common aspect of survivorship. In writing about adult survivors of child abuse, trauma expert and psychiatrist Judith Herman says: As the survivor struggles with the tasks of adult life, the legacy of her childhood becomes increasingly burdensome. Eventually, often in the fourth or fifth decade of life, the defensive structure may begin to break down. Often the precipitant is a change in the equilibrium of close relationships: The failure of a marriage, the illness or death of a parent. The facade can hold no longer, and the underlying fragmentation becomes manifest. When and if a breakdown occurs, it can take symptomatic forms that mimic virtually every form of psychiatric disorder. Survivors fear that they are going insane or will have to die (1992 p. 114). I 'm going to tell you about how this happened to me, then we 'll look at other important aspects of this process, and getting better. About me
I am a survivor of child sexual and other abuse who had undertaken successful healing work. Yet, two years ago in 2008 when I was 41, I experienced a major event that was for me the catalyst for developing panic disorder and agoraphobia. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) returned with such a vengeance that I was certain I had never before experienced it so badly. I could not allow myself to think about my history of child sexual and other abuse without experiencing the most dizzying terror about it all. I wondered if my past had finally defeated me. If you would like to read more about this part of my journey, here is a link. Two years later I am much stronger and have a greater appreciation of why this happened. I also know that I am part of a much larger group of older survivors to have felt such an impact - my older friends at Pandora 's Aquarium have been a major source of reassurance and validation to me, as was returning to therapy, and I 'll say more about this below. Survivors who may never have addressed their abuse
You may be an older survivor who has managed, through a variety of means, to hold your past in check for decades so that you could raise kids, work, or whatever else your younger life entailed. You may have not recognized the impact of abuse on your life, or you may have believed you were "over it." Perhaps you felt that you were better off forgetting about it - or maybe you actually did forget it. For whatever reason, you are now finding that you cannot hold the memories and the pain back anymore, and this is probably frightening. Beverly Engel, author of The Right to Innocence: Healing the Trauma of Childhood Sexual Abuse, writes, If you were sexually abused as a child, you are still suffering from its impact as an adult. Childhood sexual abuse is such an overwhelming, damaging, and humiliating assault on a child 's mind, soul and body that he or she cannot escape emotional damage. The abuse invades every facet of one 's sexuality, one 's ability to be successful, one 's ability to trust others, and physical health. It causes its victims to be self-destructive, overcontrolling, and abusive to others, as well as addiction to alcohol, drugs, and food and attraction to love partners who abuse them physically, verbally, and emotionally. Its victims come to feel ashamed, guilty, powerless, depressed, afraid, and angry.

Whether you actually remember the abuse or not, the damage caused by the abuse only increases with time. This is true for several reasons. First of all, when you are younger you often have many things to occupy your mind--a busy social life, the goal of completing your education and planning a career, a new marriage, starting your own family. Such endeavors are fairly time-consuming and distract you from your feelings. But as time passes, pressure mounts: You must deal with more people, cope with more responsibilities and further problems, and soon the stress grows to the point where something has to give.

As the damage becomes even more noticeable, your life becomes progressively more unmanageable. You begin to realize that time alone cannot heal the wounds, and that a history of sexual abuse is not something you can "learn to live with." On the contrary, as time goes by, the emotional damage takes a heavier toll on you. Pain that has been hidden for years suddenly becomes unbearable. Anger once successfully repressed begins surfacing, causing those who have been abused to become abusive themselves-either to others or to themselves. Feelings of dread suddenly turn into panic attacks, agoraphobia or paranoia. Chronic depression increases in intensity, causing longer and longer periods of suffering; suicidal thoughts become suicide attempts. Battles with eating and weight control, unresolved since childhood, result in anorexia, bulimia, and obesity. That tendency to drink a little too much has become a need to drink (1990) It 's also true that older survivors may have come from an era where sexual assault was not spoken about, myths abounded unchallenged that kept them ashamed and silent, and there were no resources, meaning that people victimized in this way could not find counselling. If you are experiencing any of the above, it 's important that you know it 's not too late for you to get help now. You will have to stop and take care of the little boy or girl inside you who was abused. You may be bothered by thoughts that you should be over it, but as the above quote says, child sexual abuse is a wound that time alone doesn 't heal. I once spoke to a rape survivor new to healing in her fifties who said to me, "If I have only twenty years left, I 'm going to make damn sure they 're good ones." You deserve good years too - you have been through enough - both the abuse and the decades of its impact on your life. You have been through this alone - you don 't need to be alone with it anymore. Break this long silence, my friend. We’ll look at how below. Survivors who have addressed their abuse
It’s also not unusual for older survivors who have perhaps had lots of good therapy and who are fairly advanced in healing, to find that something triggers a powerful and deeply distressing resurgence of traumatic memory and feeling. You may find that events that you have been able to think about with more ease for years, have suddenly become unbearable again, and maybe you begin to employ the same avoidance or numbing strategies that you used before you began healing. Or, you thought you knew all about containing flashbacks, but find just for now that the old methods are useless. For me, this was most disconcerting, and caused me at first to question whether any of the hard work I 'd done had actually amounted to anything. I 'd had a perky sense of self-assurance in my twenties that working through my abuse history then, would ensure that I would hit my forties a glowing model of psychological good health. I spent a lot of time crying about perceived failure because that expectation was not met. My therapist, who works with traumatized people, told me she sees many survivor clients who present saying that they 'd been getting along nicely and were rarely bothered by past traumas anymore, and then something happened to bring it all back again. They feel, she said, that they 're back to square one. But this isn’t true. For sure, it can be shattering to find that issues we thought were dealt with can still be so overwhelming. But, if this sounds like you, you need to be assured that you have not somehow "unhealed." You are feeling terrible now, for reasons you 'll begin to understand with the right support. It may help you - as it did me - to think about the progress you have made - for example, although I was again feeling absolute dread around abuse memories, I had not reverted back to blaming myself for the abuse. The work I had done on that did not “change back” just because I was afraid again. You might like to spend a few minutes watching this webcast, in which Psychiatrist and trauma expert Dr. Frank Ochberg gives reassurance for retraumatized people who may feel that they have lost any ground they made. At this stage of my own process, I have much more understanding about how it was possible - indeed, probable - for a meltdown to happen to me, and I know that it doesn 't make me weak. My sense of strength and belief in myself has returned. You will make it too my friend. But shouldn 't I be "over it" by now?
This is the bugbear of even survivors who were raped a month ago, let alone older survivors for whom it was perhaps decades ago. Two years ago, I was dreadfully embarrassed about being seen to malinger, or to still be going on about my child abuse in my forties. I now know that the fact that our experiences can still hurt so badly at times says nothing negative about our characters. It tells us much more about the nature of trauma. And we are not failures because we are hurting now. That we have managed to live full, though affected lives is testament to strength. What does "get over it" even mean? We know that this is a cliché offered to abuse survivors with boring regularity. I believe that one of the reasons we give ourselves such a hard time is through a process of internalizing the shame attached to statements like "get over it." For those who don 't know, internalization is the process through which we come - usually unwittingly - to adopt social messages as our own reality. If you did not otherwise know how to make sense of the abuse you experienced, or how you felt about it, you may have been handed platitudes that you felt compelled to accept as correct. Frustratingly, some of us find that even if we’ve intellectually rejected clichés such as “get over it” and would never say them to another survivor, that message often still resounds inside us, causing us to feel inadequate about ourselves. It shouldn’t, but it’s something many of us need to keep working on. Remember that if people have shamed you by telling you to "get over it" or questioning the fact that you aren 't yet "over it", not only are they wrong, but you have experienced Secondary Wounding, which is the messages trauma survivors receive from others that compound their pain. You 'll see a link below if you would like to read more about secondary wounding. And, is getting "over it" the same thing as healing? I am recently persuaded that the answer is no. I saw and experienced things that I have done so much healing around, but I am not "over" them in the sense that people generally mean that, and I don 't believe I ever will be. And that feels very okay to me. A lovely older survivor from Pandora 's Aquarium with whom I recently discussed this, has given me permission to quote her: Getting over it has never been a goal for me. I told my therapist that the first time I saw her. I wanted to be able to learn how to deal with the symptoms like the nightmares, the constant stress of being hypervigilant, all the things I couldn 't rid myself of, but not the memories. I really didn 't expect those to go away. And don 't think I 'd want them to if they could. It 's all too integral, I 'd have to deny most of the first 15 years of my life. All of the abuse from the incest on through the gang rape shaped a lot of who I am today even though it happened 34 to 45 years ago. I still have issues to work through. I might always have issues to work through. I don 't see that as a bad thing. Not as long as it moves you forward. I wish I 'd had that wisdom 20 years ago; I believe I would have been less embarrassed and shocked by the horrible time I had two years ago. Child abuse can be such a terrifying ordeal, such a profound betrayal. It accrues tremendous losses, and getting "over it" may be neither possible nor desirable, certainly not when it means we beat ourselves up for failing to be "over it." We don 't hang onto our histories for the fun of it; we want to heal and learn to manage the worst ravages. We strive, we have victories, and yet if memory and feeling recycle later in life, we need to respect that this is part of being a survivor, and get through it, not over it. You may also have experienced traumas after the child sexual abuse, such as domestic violence and/or adult rape that are adding to the weight of what you now feel. Why should you be over it? It may be that we need to accept that a history of child sexual abuse can have longer-term impact on us than we might once have thought. This is sad, and it isn’t fair but isn’t it better – and fairer - to approach it without castigating ourselves? Remember that where you are at has less to do with how old you are and more to do with factors such as how long you 've been addressing your abuse - you may be new to the process, and thus let me applaud you for the courage it’s taking for you to look at such painful issues after so long. If the process of exploring your abuse history is not new, we 've already seen that other things going on can stir it up. Either way, you have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of.
It may also be true that you might never be completely free of hard-wired PTSD responses. But this is no reason to despair. Please, please see the recommended reading below. The work of Marla Handy is absolutely the best ongoing scar-acceptance thing I have ever had access to. It is essential reading for people who have done their therapy, reading and other to "get better" but who may still have post-traumatic fallout at times. Marla will show you how to lose the pressure to be "completely healed." I would like any survivor reading this to take pressure off him or herself to be or to get "over it." Trauma is physical, too
Part of the reason for feeling traumatized now for events in even the distant past is physical. Our bodies were not designed to handle repeated severe stressors. Research findings indicate that the stress of early childhood trauma such as child sexual abuse, can cause actual physical changes in the brain. Traumatic memory appears to be stored differently than ordinary memory. One consequence of this is that when we 're in situations that remind us - even in not-so-obvious ways, of the actual traumatic experience/s we 've had, those memory tracts open up, causing us to feel as if it were happening again. Please see this article. You might also like to listen to Dr. Frank Ochberg 's webcast, How Does PTSD Affect Brain Function? Aphrodite Matsakis also gives an excellent explanation in her book, I Can 't Get Over It, of the biological changes that trauma, especially if it is prolonged or severe, can bring about. These changes appear to be irreversible, but it isn 't hopeless (1992 p. 39). A good therapist can work with us on managing these responses. The trauma of childhood sexual abuse can impact physically in other ways too - for example, a study found that middle-aged women who survived child sexual abuse have greater health-care costs that their non-abused counterparts (Bonomi, Anderson, Rivara et al, 2008) If you didn 't know about this already, it 's important that you do. At very least, I hope it helps you to understand that you should not be angry with yourself for feeling waves of traumatic feeling even decades after the abuse occurred. Your brain is acting the way that those of many trauma survivors do. Don 't be Ashamed
I 've said enough about how ashamed and deficient I felt for feeling so bad again in my forties, and I 've spoken to other older survivors who feel levels of embarrassment and shame about it too. I am no longer ashamed, indeed, I feel prouder than ever of my journey through this testing of my fighting spirit. I do think that there 's a general expectation that we 'll have acquired sufficient maturity and strength for dealing as we get older. But feeling recycled pain doesn 't mean we lack maturity and strength. I also know many older survivors who are able to accept wherever they 're at, and be gentle with themselves. They 've grown to a place where they don 't feel the need to apologise for being vulnerable; indeed they are wonderfully fierce about their right to own what they feel. They are models for all of us who struggle with shame over being older and finding that our histories still present difficulty. Remember that it is not your fault you were hurt, and it is not your fault you are – naturally - responding to that. Don 't Despair
If you are experiencing another wave of trauma in your later life, you may feel that it will never end. I did lots of desperate crying as I wondered if my history had finally throttled me. You may also feel as if you are going crazy, coupled with fear, anxiety and depression. It can be a time when suicidal thoughts occur. Please, do seek help from a counsellor and/or your doctor. You deserve as much support as possible to ride this out. I promise you it will get better. Take one day at a time, my friend, and reach out for support. It is there. See below for suggestions on finding a counsellor. Positives?
I think it 's highly possible that the re-emergence of trauma can offer the opportunity to heal at deeper levels. You may have heard of the "onion-skin" allegory to healing - the layers are manifold and as we unpeel them, we may hit the same issues again with stronger feeling. Although it 's hard to be grateful for so much pain, this may also offer us new ways of making sense of our experiences and the impact on our lives. At the time of this writing, I 'm considering the possibility that I felt my earlier traumas without the usual layers of protection because I actually no longer need them. It 's true for some of us that as we get older, we can feel things more deeply because our psyches decide that we are ready to do so. For sure, it was terrifying to feel everything without any buffers. But could it be that I am actually stronger than I think? I certainly did not die or go insane. I have also learned that dealing with childhood abuse is perhaps not as finite as I thought, and I think that 's a good thing to have learned. It may take time to appreciate the positives. But they are likely to be there as you come through. Seeking Help
I have heard survivors beyond count say that they 're embarrassed about going back to counseling and that they feel like failures. I sympathize; I certainly struggled with that - on my first appointment back to counselling, I spent the first half of the session sobbing that I was scared and embarrassed about being there. But there is absolutely no shame in seeking help to recover - it 's wise. You would do no less for your car! Whether you 've had counselling before and are thinking bout returning, or you have never had it, you will be bound to have concerns and questions. I suggest you watch this webcast from Doctor Frank Ochberg: What is your advice for the survivor looking for a trauma therapist? Please ask any counsellor you 're considering seeing whether they are conversant with child sexual abuse and trauma. Even if the counsellor is treating you for other symptoms related to the trauma, he or she should recognize the trauma as important in itself and never minimize that. You deserve to have a safe and supportive place to unfold this pain in. It may also be the first time that you, as an older survivor, have ever spoken about the abuse. A good counsellor will not expect you to tell all on the first appointment if that is not what you wish to do. Spend time getting to know him/her to see whether this will be a good and safe healing alliance for you. Look for a link below on seeking a therapist. Peer Support - Older Survivors at Pandora 's Aquarium
Would you like to share about your process with other older survivors? If so, let me assure you that you will be in good company at Pandora 's Aquarium message-board for survivors of rape and sexual assault. Older survivors who join our community frequently worry about the fact we have a large contingent of younger people; they feel as if they are "too old" to be there. But we in fact do have a big group of male and female survivors who are late thirties, forties, fifties and sixties plus, and we 've also had members in their seventies. Although you are welcome to post anywhere that is relevant to you, we do have a forum especially for older survivors. The name given to this forum by our older survivors is the JOY Group, and you 'll find this in the "Reaching Out" section of the board under "Survivor Communities." Please consider this as an option - you will be made very welcome. It doesn 't matter how long ago or how recently your assault was, you will find support. See this link: What you 'll find at Pandora 's Aquarium, and don 't hesitate to contact us if you have any further questions. Links
No Comfort Zone: Notes on Living with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder - Marla Handy: I cannot praise this affirming, wise book, which I have recently read, highly enough. To find out why, please read the review I wrote after reading it. If you have lived with PTSD for a long time, this book will assist you in making peace with a damaged psyche without seeing yourself as any less of a person. It is absolutely essential for people with PTSD as well as therapists, friends, family and partners. Also please see the DVD Making Peace with Chronic PTSD - Marla 's Story in which Marla has a conversation with Psychiatrist and Trauma expert Dr. Frank Ochberg.
Bubba Esther, 1888 - Ruth Whitman: A powerful poem about an elderly woman 's disclosure of incestuous abuse
Secondary Wounding - Identifying and overcoming hurt from others.
Finding a Therapist - Tips for selecting a therapist and beginning sessions.
See many more articles here on all aspects of sexual assault and survivorship References: 1. Bonomi AE, Anderson ML, Rivara FP, et al. (March 2008). "Health care utilization and costs associated with childhood abuse". Journal of General Internal Medicine23 (3): 294–9. 2. Engel, B. (1990) The Right to Innocence: Healing the Trauma of Childhood Sexual Abuse: A Therapeutic 7-Step Self-Help Program for Men and Women, Including How to Choose a Therapist and Find a Support Group, Ivy Books, USA 3. Herman, J. (1992). Trauma and Recovery: The Aftermath of Violence - from domestic abuse to political terror. BasicBooks, USA. 4. Matsakis, A. (1992) I Can 't Get Over It: A Handbook for Trauma Survivors, New Harbinger Publications Inc. California

Homosexuality and Child Sexual Abuse

Scandals involving the sexual abuse of under-age boys by homosexual priests have rocked the Roman Catholic Church. At the same time, defenders of homosexuality argue that youth organizations such as the Boy Scouts should be forced to include homosexuals among their adult leaders. Similarly, the Gay Lesbian and Straight Education Network (GLSEN), a homosexual activist organization that targets schools, has spearheaded the formation of "Gay-Straight Alliances" among students. GLSEN encourages homosexual teachers--even in the youngest grades--to be open about their sexuality, as a way of providing role models to "gay" students. In addition, laws or policies banning employment discrimination based on "sexual orientation" usually make no exception for those who work with children or youth.
Many parents have become concerned that children may be molested, encouraged to become sexually active, or even "recruited" into adopting a homosexual identity and lifestyle. Gay activists dismiss such concerns--in part, by strenuously insisting that there is no connection between homosexuality and the sexual abuse of children.
However, despite efforts by homosexual activists to distance the gay lifestyle from pedophilia, there remains a disturbing connection between the two. This is because, by definition, male homosexuals are sexually attracted to other males. While many homosexuals may not seek young sexual partners, the evidence indicates that disproportionate numbers of gay men seek adolescent males or boys as sexual partners. In this paper we will consider the following evidence linking homosexuality to pedophilia:
· Pedophiles are invariably males: Almost all sex crimes against children are committed by men.
· Significant numbers of victims are males: Up to one-third of all sex crimes against children are committed against boys (as opposed to girls).
· The 10 percent fallacy: Studies indicate that, contrary to the inaccurate but widely accepted claims of sex researcher Alfred Kinsey, homosexuals comprise between 1 to 3 percent of the population.
· Homosexuals are overrepresented in child sex offenses: Individuals from the 1 to 3 percent of the population that is sexually attracted to the same sex are committing up to one-third of the sex crimes against children.
· Some homosexual activists defend the historic connection between homosexuality and pedophilia: Such activists consider the defense of "boy-lovers" to be a legitimate gay rights issue.
· Pedophile themes abound in homosexual literary culture: Gay fiction as well as serious academic treatises promote "intergenerational intimacy."
MALE HOMOSEXUALS COMMIT A DISPROPORTIONATE NUMBER OF CHILD SEX ABUSE CASES
Homosexual apologists admit that some homosexuals sexually molest children, but they deny that homosexuals are more likely to commit such offenses. After all, they argue, the majority of child molestation cases are heterosexual in nature. While this is correct in terms of absolute numbers, this argument ignores the fact that homosexuals comprise only a very small percentage of the population.
The evidence indicates that homosexual men molest boys at rates grossly disproportionate to the rates at which heterosexual men molest girls. To demonstrate this it is necessary to connect several statistics related to the problem of child sex abuse: 1) men are almost always the perpetrator; 2) up to one-third or more of child sex abuse cases are committed against boys; 3) less than three percent of the population are homosexuals. Thus, a tiny percentage of the population (homosexual men), commit one-third or more of the cases of child sexual molestation.
Men Account for Almost All Sexual Abuse of Children Cases
· An essay on adult sex offenders in the book Sexual Offending Against Children reported:"It is widely believed that the vast majority of sexual abuse is perpetrated by males and that female sex offenders only account for a tiny proportion of offences. Indeed, with 3,000 adult male sex offenders in prison in England and Wales at any one time, the corresponding figure for female sex offenders is 12!"[1]
· Kee MacFarlane, et al., writing in Sexual Abuse of Young Children: Evaluation and Treatment report:"The large majority of sexual perpetrators appear to be males (Herman and Hirschman, 1981; Lindholm and Willey, 1983)."[2]
· A report by the American Professional Society on the Abuse of Children states: "In both clinical and non-clinical samples, the vast majority of offenders are male."[3]
· A study in the Journal of Sex Research states that "pedophilia does not exist, or is extremely rare, in women."[4]
A Significant Percentage of Child Sexual Abuse Victims are Boys
· According to the Journal of Child Psychiatry: "It was commonly believed fifteen years ago that girls were abused in excess of boys in a ratio of about 9 to 1, but contemporary studies now indicate that the ratio of girls to boys abused has narrowed remarkably. . . . The majority of community studies suggest a . . . ratio . . . in the order of 2 to 4 girls to 1 boy."[5] Another study found that "some authors now believe that boys may be sexually abused as commonly as girls (Groth, 1978; O 'Brien, 1980)."[6]
· A study of 457 male sex offenders against children in Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy found that "approximately one-third of these sexual offenders directed their sexual activity against males."[7]
Sexual Abuse of Boys is Underreported
The actual percentage of child sexual abuse victims who are boys very likely exceeds the above estimates. Many researchers echo the view of the Journal of Child Psychiatry study, which refers to the "under-reporting of the incidence and prevalence of sexual abuse in boys."[8]
· Dr. Robert Johnson, in Medical Aspects of Human Sexuality, reports: "The vast majority of cases of male sexual molestation is not reported. As a result, these young men keep both the incidents and their feelings to themselves."[9]
· The Department of Justice report on child sexual exploitation explains why the percentage of boy victims is underestimated: "Adolescent boy victims are highly likely to deny certain types of sexual activity. . . . They are embarrassed and ashamed of their behavior and rightfully believe that society will not understand their victimization. . . . No matter what the investigator does, most adolescent boys will deny they were victims."[10]
· The Journal of Child Psychiatry adds: "Boys are usually encultured into an ethos where self-reliance, independence and sexual prowess are valued, while showing hurt or homosexuality are denigrated. . . . This may lead to powerful repression or deletion of the experience, with failure to report."[11]
Homosexuals Comprise Less than 3 Percent of the Population
· Relying upon three large data sets: the General Social Survey, the National Health and Social Life Survey, and the U.S. census, a recent study in Demography estimates the number of exclusive male homosexuals in the general population at 2.5 percent, and the number of exclusive lesbians at 1.4 percent.[12]
· A study of the sexual behavior of men in the United States based on the National Survey of Men (a nationally representative sample comprised of 3,321 men aged twenty to thirty-nine, published in Family Planning Perspectives), found that "2 percent of sexually active men aged twenty to thirty-nine . . . had had any same-gender sexual activity during the last ten years. Approximately 1 percent of the men (1.3 percent among whites and 0.2 percent among blacks) reported having had exclusively homosexual activity.[13]
· J. Gordon Muir, writing in The Wall Street Journal, discusses a number of studies that have found that homosexuals comprise between 1 to 3 percent of the population.[14]
· In a survey of studies on homosexuals in different populations, the Archives of Sexual Behavior reported a random sample of Hawaii State residents interviewed by telephone. The study found "just about 3 percent of males and 1.2 percent of females as having engaged in same-sex or bisexual activity."[15] However, this relatively higher number is attributed to the fact that the study was not limited to exclusive homosexuals, but included all those who at some time in their lives engaged in same-sex activities.[16]
Homosexual Pedophiles are Vastly Overrepresented in Child Sex Abuse Cases
Homosexual pedophiles sexually molest children at a far greater rate compared to the percentage of homosexuals in the general population. A study in the Journal of Sex Research found, as we have noted above, that "approximately one-third of [child sex offenders] had victimized boys and two-thirds had victimized girls." The authors then make a prescient observation: "Interestingly, this ratio differs substantially from the ratio of gynephiles (men who erotically prefer physically mature females) to androphiles (men who erotically prefer physically mature males), which is at least 20 to 1."[17]
In other words, although heterosexuals outnumber homosexuals by a ratio of at least 20 to 1, homosexual pedophiles commit about one-third of the total number of child sex offenses.
Similarly, the Archives of Sexual Behavior also noted that homosexual pedophiles are significantly overrepresented in child sex offence cases:
The best epidemiological evidence indicates that only 2 to 4 percent of men attracted to adults prefer men (ACSF Investigators, 1992; Billy et al.,1993; Fay et al.,1989; Johnson et al.,1992); in contrast, around 25 to 40 percent of men attracted to children prefer boys (Blanchard et al.,1999; Gebhard et al.,1965; Mohr et al.,1964). Thus, the rate of homosexual attraction is 6 to 20 times higher among pedophiles."[18]
The stark imbalance between homosexual and heterosexual child molestationswas confirmed in the Archives of Sexual Behavior study itself, which divided 260 pedophile participants into three groups: "152 heterosexual pedophiles (men with offenses or self-reported attractions involving girls only), 43 bisexual pedophiles (boys and girls), and 65 homosexual pedophiles (boys only)."[19] In other words, 25 percent of the offenders were homosexual pedophiles--or 41 percent if those who molest girls as well as boys are included.
Other studies report an unusually high percentage of child molestations by homosexual pedophiles:
· A study on pedophilia in the Psychiatric Journal of the University of Ottawa reported: "According to the literature, findings of a two-to-one ratio of heterosexual to homosexual pedophiles have been documented."[20]
· The Journal of Sex Research reports a study that included "199 offenders against female children and 96 offenders against male children. . . . This would indicate a proportional prevalence of 32 percent of homosexual offenders against children."[21]
· A study of male child sex offenders in Child Abuse and Neglect found that fourteen percent targeted only males, and a further 28 percent chose males as well as females as victims, thus indicating that 42 percent of male pedophiles engaged in homosexual molestation.[22]
ARE MEN WHO MOLEST BOYS REALLY 'HOMOSEXUALS '? Gay Apologists Insist on a Simplistic Stereotype of Pedophilia
Central to the attempts to separate homosexuality from pedophilia is the claim that pedophiles cannot, by definition, be considered homosexuals. Relying upon a questionable methodology[23], the gay advocacy organization Human Rights Campaign published a "Fact Sheet on Sexual Orientation and Child Abuse," that states: "A sexual abuser who molests a child of the same sex is usually not considered homosexual."[24]
The basis for this claim is the view that pedophiles who molest boys cannot be considered homosexual if that individual has at any time been married or sexually involved with women. 'Homosexual Pedophiles ': A Clinical Term
The fact is, however, that the terms "homosexual" and "pedophile" are not mutually exclusive: they describe two intersecting types of sexual attraction. Webster 's Dictionary defines "homosexual" as someone who is sexually attracted to persons of the same sex. "Pedophile" is defined as "an adult who is sexually attracted to young children." The former definition refers to the gender of the desired sexual object, while the latter refers to the age of the desired sexual object.
A male "homosexual pedophile," then, is defined as someone who is generally (but not exclusively, see below) sexually attracted to boys, while a female "homosexual pedophile" is sexually attracted to girls.[25]
The term "homosexual pedophile" was first used in the early 20th century by the Viennese psychiatrist Dr. Richard von Krafft-Ebing, who pioneered the systematic study of sexual deviance. Krafft-Ebing described pedophiles as heterosexually, homosexually or bisexually oriented.[26] This division has been accepted by pedophiles themselves,[27] and is well attested in the literature:
· A study of child molesters in Behavior Research and Therapy found that "a homosexual and a heterosexual subgroup can be delineated among these offenders."[28]
· The Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy published a study on the same topic, which discussed "the proportional prevalences of heterosexual and homosexual pedophilia."[29] The study commented on a study that found that "the percentage of the homosexual pedophiles would be 45.8." Even adjusted downward for exhibitionists, "this would still indicate a much higher percentage (34 percent) of homosexuals among pedophiles than among men who prefer physically mature partners."[30]
· In a review of studies on pedophilia, the Psychiatric Journal of the University of Ottawa concluded: "The findings of previous studies report that pedophiles can be divided into heterosexual and homosexual pedophiles according to their erotic preference. . . . This was confirmed in this recent study."[31] The article classified homosexual pedophilia into three types: the socially inadequate homosexual pedophile, the intrusive homosexual pedophile, and the undifferentiated homosexual pedophile.[32]
· A study of pedophiles in Behavior Research and Therapy concluded: "The second, and perhaps the most important observation we made, is that a homosexual and a heterosexual subgroup can be delineated among these offenders. . . . Categorizing them in this way revealed important differences in the pattern of their sexual preferences."[33]
· The International Journal of Offender Therapy and Comparative Criminology refers to homosexual pedophiles as a "distinct group." The victims of homosexual pedophiles "were more likely to be strangers, that they were more likely to have engaged in paraphiliac behavior separate from that involved in the offence, and that they were more likely to have past convictions for sexual offences. . . . Other studies [showed a] greater risk of reoffending than those who had offended against girls" and that the "recidivism rate for male-victim offenders is approximately twice that for female-victim offenders."[34]
Homosexuals and Homosexual Pedophiles Engage in a Wide Variety of Sexual Behavior that Belies Simplistic Categories
Despite this evidence, in their efforts to divorce homosexuality from pedophilia, homosexual apologists insist on a rigid, narrow definition of the terms "homosexual" and "pedophile" that permits no overlap of the terms. They deny that homosexuals are attracted in inordinate numbers to boys. They also claim that pedophiles cannot be classified as "homosexual" if at any time they have had sexual relations with women.
However, such a narrow definition does not do justice to the complex nature of pedophilia. Researchers have long been aware that pedophiles exhibit a wide variety of sexual attractions and behavior--often to draw attention away from their primary lust for boys. A study on sex offenders in the International Journal of Offender Therapy and Comparative Criminology notes that "the reason child sexual abusers are successful at remaining undetected is because they do not fit a stereotype."[35]
The data indicates that both homosexuality and pedophilia are intersecting categories that admit to a wide variety of sexual behavior:
Homosexual Males are Sexually Attracted to Underage Boys
· A study in Archives of Sexual Behavior found that homosexual men are attracted to young males. The study compared the sexual age preferences of heterosexual men, heterosexual women, homosexual men, and lesbians. The results showed that, in marked contrast to the other three categories, "all but 9 of the 48 homosexual men preferred the youngest two male age categories," which included males as young as age fifteen.[36]
· In The Gay Report, by homosexual researchers Karla Jay and Allen Young, the authors report data showing that 73 percent of homosexuals surveyed had at some time had sex with boys sixteen to nineteen years of age or younger."[37]
Conversely, Homosexual Pedophiles are Often Attracted to Adult Males
· A study of sex offenders against male children in Behavior Research and Therapy found that male homosexual pedophiles are sexually attracted to "males of all ages." Compared to non-offenders, the offenders showed "greater arousal" to slides of nude males as old as twenty-four: "As a group, the child molesters responsed [sp] with moderate sexual arousal . . . to the nude males of all ages."[38]
· A study of Canadians imprisoned for pedophilia in the Journal of Interpersonal Violence noted that some of the adult male offenders engaged in homosexual acts with adult males.[39]
· Many pedophiles, in fact, consider themselves to be homosexual. A study of 229 convicted child molesters in Archives of Sexual Behavior found that "eighty-six percent of offenders against males described themselves as homosexual or bisexual."[40]
· Fr. John Harvey, founder and director of Courage, a support ministry for Catholics who struggle with same-sex attraction, explains that "the pedophile differs from the ordinary homosexual in that the former admires boyishness in the object of his affections, while the latter admires manliness."[41] However, the categories are not completely separate:
While granting that the majority of homosexuals are not aroused by young boys, the distinction between homosexuality and homosexual pedophilia is not quite absolute. In some cases the interest oscillates between young adolescents and adults, in others between boys and adolescents; in exceptional cases a man may be interested in boys at one time and adults at another.[42]
Many Pedophiles are Attracted to Women, Marry, and Have Children
Gay activists insist that pedophilia has nothing to do with homosexuality because pedophiles are only sexually interested in children, whereas homosexuals only have sexual relations with adults. We have already seen that this stereotypical view is not correct with regard to homosexuals. There is also abundant evidence demonstrating that, while primarily interested in children, pedophiles nevertheless exhibit a wide variety of sexual behaviors, including relationships with women:
· A study in Child Abuse and Neglect found that 48 percent of the offenders either were married or had been married at some time.[43]
· The Journal of Interpersonal Violence studied the sexual preferences of male pedophiles who sexually abused children. When they compared the sexual response of the pedophiles with the control group, they found, unexpectedly: "Surprisingly, the two groups did not differ in their response to the nude female stimuli."[44]
· A study in the Psychiatric Journal of the University of Ottawa reported that "most of the middle-aged pedophiles have had significant adult sexual activity."[45] Fifty-eight percent of the pedophiles in one study had at least one child, while other research indicated that "more than two-thirds of the married pedophiles in their sample had children, with an average of two to three children per subject."[46]
· A report by the Department of Justice addressed the devious stratagems of pedophiles, who will go to great lengths to conceal their true desires: "Preferential sex offenders may be 'pillars of the community ' and are often described as 'nice guys. ' They almost always have a means of access to children (for example, through marriage, neighborhood, or occupation.)"[47]
Thus, the evidence shows that homosexual pedophiles cannot be narrowly defined as individuals who are solely attracted to underage boys. In fact there is considerable overlap between homosexuality and pedophilia.
PEDOPHILIA IN GAY CULTURE The Historical Connection between Pedophilia and the Gay Rights Movement
David Thorstad is a homosexual activist and historian of the gay rights movement.[48] He is a former president of New York 's Gay Activists Alliance (GAA), a prototype activist group founded in December 1969. The GAA at its inception opposed age of consent laws, which prohibited adults from having sex with children.[49] Thorstad is also a pedophile and founding member of the North American Man Boy Love Association (NAMBLA).
Thorstad argues that there is a natural and undeniable connection between homosexuality and pedophilia. He expresses bitterness that the gay rights movement has, in his view, abandoned pedophilia. Thorstad writes: "Boy-lovers were involved in the gay movement from the beginning, and their presence was tolerated. Gay youth groups encouraged adults to attend their dances. . . . There was a mood of tolerance, even joy at discovering the myriad of lifestyles within the gay and lesbian subculture."[50]
The inaugural issue of the Gay Community News in 1979 published a "Statement to the Gay Liberation Movement on the Issue of Man/Boy Love," which challenged the movement to return to a vision of sexual liberation. It argued that "the ultimate goal of gay liberation is the achievement of sexual freedom for all--not just equal rights for 'lesbian and gay men, ' but also freedom of sexual expression for young people and children."
In the early years there was some reluctance to accept pedophilia, primarily among feminist and lesbian activist groups. In March 1979 the Lesbian Feminist Liberation (LFL) accusing "so-called Man/Boy Lovers" of "attempting to legitimize sex between children and adults. . . . Feminists easily recognize this as the latest attempt to make palatable the sexual exploitation of children." The coalition went on record as opposing "the sexual abuse of children by heterosexual or homosexual persons."[51]
Despite this opposition, Thorstad claims that by 1985 homosexual pedophiles had won acceptance within the gay movement. He cites Jim Kepner, then curator of the International Gay and Lesbian Archives in Los Angeles: "A point I 've been trying to make is that if we reject the boylovers in our midst today we 'd better stop waving the banner of the Ancient Greeks, of Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci, Oscar Wilde, Walt Whitman, Horatio Alger, and Shakespeare. We 'd better stop claiming them as part of our heritage unless we are broadening our concept of what it means to be gay today."[52]
In 1985 NAMBLA was admitted as a member in New York 's council of Lesbian and Gay Organizations as well as the International Gay Association--now the International Lesbian and Gay Association (ILGA). In the mid-1990 's ILGA 's association with NAMBLA and other pedophile groups cost the organization it 's status as a Non-Governmental Organization in the United Nations.
ILGA 's renewed attempt to gain admittance to the UN was rejected again in April 2002 because the organization "did not document that it had purged pedophile groups such as [NAMBLA]." The Washington Times reports that Ishtiag H. Anrabi, Pakistani delegate to the UN Economic and Social Council, expressed concern that ILGA was continuing to be secretive about ties with pedophile groups: "For more than a year, the ILGA has refused to provide documentation or allow review of its membership list to demonstrate that pedophilia groups have been expelled."[53]
Pedophile Themes Abound in Gay Literature
The late "beat" poet Allen Ginsberg illustrates the seamless connection between homosexuality and pedophilia. Many know Ginsberg as an illustrious "out" homosexual poet: fewer are aware that he was also a pedophile.
Biographer Raymond-Jean Frontain refers to Ginsberg 's publications in both NAMBLA Bulletin and NAMBLA Journal. He discusses how Ginsberg 's biographers failed to discuss his poems that contained pederastic themes:
Although both Shumacher and Barry Miles (Ginsberg 's initial biographer) frankly discuss Ginsberg 's sexual politics, neither refers to his involvement with the controversial North American Man/Boy Love Association. . . . I reread Collected Poems and Ginsberg 's two subsequent collections, surprised by the pattern of references to anal intercourse and to pederasty that emerged.[54]
Ginsberg was one of the first of a growing number of homosexual writers who cater to the fascination with pedophilia in the gay community. Mary Eberstadt, writing in the Weekly Standard, documents how the taboo against sex with children continues to erode--with the impetus coming from homosexual writers.[55]
Revealingly, the examples she provides of pedophilia in current literature come from gay fiction. Eberstadt cites the Village Voice, which states that "Gay fiction is rich with idyllic accounts of 'intergenerational relationships, ' as such affairs are respectfully called these days."[56] Other examples of pedophilia-themed gay fiction include:
· In the introduction of the "mainstream" homosexual anthology Penguin Book on International Gay Writing, David Leavitt notes matter-of-factly that "Another 'forbidden ' topic from which European writers seem less likely to shrink is the love of older men for young boys." Leavitt praises one book with a pedophilic theme included in the anthology as a "coolly assured narrative [which] compels the reader to imagine the world from a perspective he might ordinarily condemn."[57]
· Several texts included in another anthology, The Gay Canon: Great Books Every Gay Man Should Read, feature scenes of man-boy sex. One such book is praised as "an operatic adventure into the realms of love, personality, ambition and art . . . a pure joy to read." The protagonist is "a pedophile 's dream: the mind of a man in the body of a boy."[58] Another novel which includes graphic descriptions of sexual violence against boys is said to "[tear] straight to the heart of one of the greatest sources, community-wide, of 1990 's gay angst: What to do with men who love boys?"[59]
· Yet another anthology of homosexual fiction, A History of Gay Literature: The Male Tradition, published by Yale University Press, includes "a longish chapter on 'Boys and Boyhood ' which is a seemingly definitive account of pro-pedophile literary works."[60] The author appears more concerned with the feelings and emotions of the man than with his boy victim. He explores the question of "whether or not you regard [having sex with boys] as a way of retreating from life or, on the contrary, as a way of engaging with it at its most honest and least corrupted level."[61]
· A significant percentage of books that have appeared on the Gay Men 's Press fiction bestseller list contain pedophilia themes, including:
Some Boys: described as a "memoir of a lover of boys" that "evokes the author 's young friends across four decades."[62]
For a Lost Soldier: the story of a sexual relationship between a soldier and an eleven-year-old boy, set during World War II.[63]
A Good Start, Considering: yet another story about an eleven-year-old boy (!) who suffers sexual abuse but is rescued by a teenager who "offers him love and affection"[64]
Terre Haute: billed as "A poetic novel of sexual awakening in the American Midwest, tracing an adolescent 's journey from introspection to perilous desire."
Shiva and Arun: the story of two Indian adolescents who "discover early on the joys of sex."
Teardrops on My Drum: barefoot kids in 1920 's Liverpool search for "adventure, love and sex."
Pro-pedophilia Publications
Recent years have seen the appearance of publications that lend a scholarly veneer to the fascination with pedophilia in the gay community. Such publications attempt to make the case for "intergenerational intimacy." The nation 's largest gay publisher, Alyson Publications, which distributes Daddy 's Roommate and other homosexual books that promote homosexuality to children, publishes books advocating man-boy sex, including:
· Paedophilia: The Radical Case, which contains detailed information on how to engage in sexual relations with young boys.[65]
· The Age Taboo, another defense of pedophiliawhich claims: "Boy-lovers . . . are not child molesters. The child abusers are . . . parents who force their staid morality onto the young people in their custody."[66]
The Journal of Homosexuality and Pedophilia
The Journal of Homosexuality is viewed as the premier "mainstream" English-language publication of the gay movement. One prominent editor is John DeCecco, a psychologist at San Francisco State University who also serves on the editorial board of the Dutch pedophile journal Paidika. It is therefore not surprising to see pedophilia promoted on its pages.
In 1990 the Journal of Homosexuality published a series of essays on pedophilia that were eventually published as Male Inter-Generational Intimacy:Historical, Socio-Psychological, and Legal Perspectives, edited by pedophile Edward Brongersma. None of the essays offered any substantive criticism of pedophilia: most blatantly promoted man-boy love as the natural right of homosexuals.
In 1999 Helmut Graupner, wrote an article on pedophilia in the Journal of Homosexuality, in which he claims: "Man/boy and woman/girl relations without doubt are same-sex relations and they do constitute an aspect of gay and lesbian life." Graupner argues that, as such, consensual sexual relations between adult homosexuals and youths as young as fourteen qualifies as a "gay rights issue."[67]
The fascination with pedophilia continues to be a cause of concern even within the gay community. Lesbian columnist Paula Martinac, writing in the homosexual newspaper Washington Blade, states:
[S]ome gay men still maintain that an adult who has same-sex relations with someone under the legal age of consent is on some level doing the kid a favor by helping to bring him or her 'out. ' It 's not pedophilia, this thinking goes--pedophilia refers only to little kids. Instead, adult-youth sex is viewed as an important aspect of gay culture, with a history dating back to 'Greek love ' of ancient times. This romanticized version of adult-youth sexual relations has been a staple of gay literature and has made appearances, too, in gay-themed films.[68]
Martinac adds that "When some gay men venerate adult-youth sex as affirming while simultaneously declaring 'We 're not pedophiles, ' they send an inconsistent message to society. . . . The lesbian and gay community will never be successful in fighting the pedophile stereotype until we all stop condoning sex with young people."[69]
VICTIM 'S TURNED VICTIMIZERS: THE CONSEQUENCES OF HOMOSEXUAL CHILD ABUSE
The steadfast denial of the disturbing ties with pedophilia within the homosexual movement is no purely academic matter. Perhaps the most tragic aspect of the homosexual-pedophile connection is the fact that men who sexually molest boys all too often lead their victims into homosexuality and pedophilia. The evidence indicates that a high percentage of homosexuals and pedophiles were themselves sexually abused as children:
· The Archives of Sexual Behavior reports: "One of the most salient findings of this study is that 46 percent of homosexual men and 22 percent of homosexual women reported having been molested by a person of the same gender. This contrasts to only 7 percent of heterosexual men and 1 percent of heterosexual women reporting having been molested by a person of the same gender."[70]
· A study of 279 homosexual/bisexual men with AIDS and control patients discussed in the Journal of the American Medical Association reported: "More than half of both case and control patients reported a sexual act with a male by age 16 years, approximately 20 percent by age 10 years."[71]
· Noted child sex abuse expert David Finkelhor found that "boys victimized by older men were over four times more likely to be currently engaged in homosexual activity than were non-victims. The finding applied to nearly half the boys who had had such an experience. . . . Further, the adolescents themselves often linked their homosexuality to their sexual victimization experiences."[72]
· A study in the International Journal of Offender Therapy and Comparative Criminology found:"In the case of childhood sexual experiences prior to the age of fourteen, 40 percent (of the pedophile sample) reported that they had engaged 'very often ' in sexual activity with an adult, with 28 percent stating that this type of activity had occurred 'sometimes '"[73]
· A National Institute of Justice report states that "the odds that a childhood sexual abuse victim will be arrested as an adult for any sex crime is 4.7 times higher than for people . . . who experienced no victimization as children."[74]
· A Child Abuse and Neglect study found that 59 percent of male child sex offenders had been "victim of contact sexual abuse as a child."[75]
· The Journal of Child Psychiatry noted that "there is a tendency among boy victims to recapitulate their own victimization, only this time with themselves in the role of perpetrator and someone else the victim."[76]
The circle of abuse is the tragic legacy of the attempts by homosexuals to legitimize having sex with boys. For too many boys it is already too late to protect them from those who took advantage of their need for love and attention. All too many later perpetrate the abuse by themselves engaging in the sexual abuse of boys. Only by exposing the lies, insincere denials, and deceptions--including those wrapped in scholastic garb--of those who prey sexually on children, can we hope to build a wall of protection around the helpless children among us.
END NOTES
1. Dawn Fisher, "Adult Sex Offenders: Who are They? Why and How Do They Do It?" in Tony Morrison, et al., eds., Sexual Offending Against Children (London: Routledge, 1994), p. 11.
2. Kee MacFarlane, et al., Sexual Abuse of Young Children: Evaluation and Treatment (New York: The Guilford Press, 1986), p. 9.
3. John Briere, et al.,eds., The APSAC Handbook on Child Maltreatment (Thousand Oaks, California: Sage Publications, 1996), pp. 52, 53.
4. Kurt Freund, et al., "Pedophilia and Heterosexuality vs. Homosexuality," Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy 10 (Fall 1984): 198; See also Freund, K, and Watson, R. J., "The Proportions of Heterosexual and Homosexual Paedophiles among Sex Offenders against Children: an Exploratory Study," Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy 18 (1992): 34.
5. Bill Watkins and Arnon Bentovim, "The Sexual Abuse of Male Children and Adolescents: A Review of Current Research," Journal of Child Psychiatry 33 (1992); in Byrgen Finkelman, Sexual Abuse (New York: Garland Publishing, 1995), p. 300.
6. MacFarlane, p. 9.
7. Kurt Freund, et al., "Pedophilia and Heterosexuality vs. Homosexuality," Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy 10 (1984): 197. "The proportional prevalence of offenders against male children in this group of 457 offenders against children was 36 percent." See also, Kurt Freund, et al., "Heterosexuality, Homosexuality, and Erotic Age Preference," "Approximately one-third of these individuals had victimized boys and two-thirds had victimized girls. This finding is consistent with the proportions reported in two earlier studies," p. 107.
8. Watkins and Bentovim, p. 315.
9. Robert L. Johnson, "Long-term Effects of Sexual Abuse in Boys," Medical Aspects of Human Sexuality (September 1988): 38.
10. "Understanding and Investigating Child Sexual Exploitation," (U.S. Department of Justice, Office of Justice Programs, 1997), p. 12.
11. Watkins and Bentovim, p. 302.
12. Dan Black, et al., "Demographics of the Gay and Lesbian Population in the United States: Evidence from Available Systematic Data Sources," Demography 37 (May 2000): 141.
13. John O. G. Billy, et al., "The Sexual Behavior of Men in the United States," Family Planning Perspectives 25 (March/April 1993): 58.
14. J. Gordon Muir, "Homosexuals and the 10 percent Fallacy," Wall Street Journal (March 31, 1993).
15. Milton Diamond, "Homosexuality and Bisexuality in Different Populations," Archives of Sexual Behavior 22 (1993):300.
16. Ibid. Significantly, a number of studies that were surveyed, and which skewed the overall percentages of homosexuals upwards, included such vague definers as those having had "any homosexual body contact." In contrast, one study that was limited to self-identifying homosexuals found that less than 2 percent of the male respondents considered their "sexual orientation" to be homosexual, p. 293.
17. Freund, "Heterosexuality, Homosexuality, and Erotic Age Preference," p. 107. In this and previous studies, Freund claims that homosexuals are no more likely than heterosexuals to be attracted to children (p. 115). However, Silverthorn, et al., mentions the limitations of studies by Freund and others: "Studies of homosexual male preferences are also limited. . . . The Freund et al.(1973) study was possibly compromised because the homosexual men used in the study were selected to be sexually attracted to adults, but not teenaged, males. The Bailey et al. (1994) study was limited in that it did not present participants with objective stimuli but simply asked participants to report what age of sexual partner they preferred . . . the Jankowiak et al. (1992) study . . . was limited in two ways: the homosexual male participants had a limited age range of 'middle-aged professionals ' and the stimuli presented to participants were also of a limited age range ( 'university to middle-aged ')." Silverthorn attempted to correct these deficiencies, and in his study found that homosexuals "preferred younger partners than those who preferred female partners"--including those as young as fifteen. Zebulon A. Silverthorne and Vernon L. Quinsey, "Sexual Partner Age Preferences of Homosexual and Heterosexual Men and Women," Archives of Sexual Behavior 29 (February 2000): 67-76.
18. Ray Blanchard, et al., "Fraternal Birth Order and Sexual Orientation in Pedophiles," Archives of Sexual Behavior 29 (2000): 464.
19. Ibid., p. 471.
20. John M. W. Bradford, et al., "The Heterogeneity/Homogeneity of Pedophilia," Psychiatric Journal of the University of Ottawa 13 (1988): 225. Elsewhere the study notes: "Researchers have variously estimated the incidence of homosexual pedophilia between 19 percent and 33 percent of reported molestations," p. 218.
21. Freund, "Pedophilia and Heterosexuality vs. Homosexuality," p. 197.
22. Michele Elliott, "Child Sexual Abuse Prevention: What Offenders Tell Us," Child Abuse and Neglect 19 (1995): 581.
23. The fact sheet discusses a study by Carole Jenny, et al., which claims that only 2 of 269 child molesters could be identified as gay or lesbian. Carole Jenny, et al., "Are Children at Risk for Sexual Abuse by Homosexuals?" Pediatrics 94 (July 1994): 41-44. However, the Jenny study utilized an atypical research technique: the reported child molesters themselves were not interviewed. Instead, the researchers relied upon the subjective opinions of "informants" who accompanied the child victim to the medical clinic. The qualifications for such "informants" to determine the sexual behavior of the accused molester were not established. However, once it is "determined" beforehand that pedophiles who molest boys cannot be considered gay or homosexual if they have had sexual relations with women, it is a foregone conclusion that few if any of the pedophiles -who often have girlfriends, are married, and have children - will be labeled homosexual. The Jenny study used this narrow profile despite the fact that the study itself found that 22 percent of the perpetrators were of the same sex as the victim. In these cases the molesters clearly engaged in homosexual sexual molestation.
24. "Fact Sheet on Sexual Orientation and Child Abuse," Human Rights Campaign (2001):available at: http://hrc.grassroots.com/family/soandchildabusefact/. The fact sheet discusses a study by Carole Jenny, et al., which claims that only 2 of 269 child molesters could be identified as gay or lesbian. Carole Jenny, et al., "Are Children at Risk for Sexual Abuse by Homosexuals?" pp. 41-44. However, the Jenny study utilized an atypical research technique. The reported child molesters themselves were not interviewed; instead, the researchers relied upon the subjective opinions of "informants" who accompanied the child victim to the medical clinic.
25. Note that the well-accepted definition of "child" as someone between infancy and the age of maturation is employed here.
26. Bradford, p.218.
27. "[Pedophiles] can be of either sex or any [sexual] orientation, i.e., homosexual, heterosexual or bisexual." Paedophilia:Some Questions and Answers (London: Paedophilic Informational Exchange, 1978); quoted in Seth L. Goldstein, "Investigating Child Sexual Exploitation:Law Enforcement 's Role," FBI Law Enforcement Bulletin 53 (January 1984): 23.
28. W. L. Marshall, et al., "Sexual Offenders against Male Children: Sexual Preferences," Behavior Research and Therapy 26 (March 1988): 390.
29. Freund, "Pedophilia and Heterosexuality vs. Homosexuality," p.194.
30. Ibid., p. 197.
31. Bradford, et al., p. 217.
32. Ibid., pp. 218, 219.
33. Marshall, p. 390.
34. James Bickley and Anthony R. Beech, "Classifying Child Abusers: Its Relevance to Theory and Clinical Practice," International Journal of Offender Therapy and Comparative Criminology 45 (2001): 56.
35. Krisin A. Danni, et al., "An Analysis of Predicators of Child Sex Offender Types Using Presentence Investigation Reports," International Journal of Offender Therapy and Comparative Criminology 44 (2000): 491.
36. Zebulon A. Silverthorne and Vernon L. Quinsey, "Sexual Partner Age Preferences of Homosexual and Heterosexual Men and Women," p.73.
37. Karla Jay and Allen Young, The Gay Report: Lesbians and Gay Men Speak Out about Sexual Experiences and Lifestyles (New York: Summit Books, 1979), p. 275
38. Marshall, "Sexual Offenders against Male Children: Sexual Preferences," p. 383.
39. W. L. Marshall, et al., "Early Onset and Deviant Sexuality in Child Molesters," Journal of Interpersonal Violence 6 (1991): 323-336.
40. W. D. Erickson, "Behavior Patterns of Child Molesters," Archives of Sexual Behavior 17 (1988): 83.
41. John F. Harvey, O.S.F.S., The Homosexual Person: New Thinking in Pastoral Care (San Francisco: Ignatius Press:1987): 221
42. Ibid., p. 219.
43. Elliott, p. 581.
44. Marshall, "Sexual Offenders against Male Children: Sexual Preferences," p. 383.
45. Bradford, p. 219.
46. Bradford, p. 224.
47. "Understanding and Investigating Child Sexual Exploitation," p. 5.
48. Thorstad is coý 'author, with John Lauritsen, of The early homosexual rights movement (1864ý '1935) (New York: Times Change Press, 1974).
49. David Thorstad, "May/Boy Love and the American Gay Movement" Journal of Homosexuality 20 (1990): 252.
50. Ibid., p. 253.
51. Ibid., p. 258.
52. Ibid., p. 266.
53. George Archibald, "U.N. Group Keeps Ban on Gay Lobby," Washington Times (May 1, 2002).
54. Raymond-Jean Frontain, "The Works of Allen Ginsberg," Journal of Homosexuality 34 (1997): 109.
55. Mary Eberstadt, " 'Pedophilia Chic ' Reconsidered" The Weekly Standard 6 (January 8, 2001).
56. Ibid., p. 21.
57. Ibid., p. 22.
58. Ibid.
59. Ibid.
60. Ibid., p. 23.
61. Ibid. Emphasis added by Eberstadt.
62. Ibid., p. 23.
63. Ibid.
64. From the Gay Men 's Press website: www.gmppubs.co.uk/cgi-bin/web_store/web_store.cgi
65. Tom O 'Carroll, Paedophilia: The Radical Case (Boston:Alyson Publications, 1982).
66. Daniel Tsang, editor, The Age Taboo: Gay Male Sexuality, Power, and Consent (Boston: Alyson Publications ; London : Gay Men 's Press, 1981), p. 144.
67. Helmut Graupner, "Love Versus Abuse: Crossgenerational Sexual Relations of Minors: A Gay Rights Issue?" Journal of Homosexuality 37 (1999): 23, 26.
68. Paula Martinac, "Mixed Messages on Pedophilia Need to be Clarified, Unified," Washington Blade (March 15, 2002).
69. Ibid.
70. Marie, E. Tomeo, et al., "Comparative Data of Childhood and Adolescence Molestation in Heterosexual and Homosexual Persons," Archives of Sexual Behavior 30 (2001): 539.
71. Harry W. Haverkos, et al., "The Initiation of Male Homosexual Behavior," The Journal of the American Medical Association 262 (July 28, 1989): 501.
72. Watkins and Bentovim, p. 316.
73. Gary A. Sawle, Jon Kear-Colwell, "Adult Attachment Style and Pedophilia: A Developmental Perspective," International Journal of Offender Therapy and Comparative Criminology 45 (February 2001):6.
74. Cathy Spatz Widom, "Victims of Childhood Sexual Abuse - Later Criminal Consequences," Victims of Childhood Sexual Abuse Series:NIJ Research in Brief, (March 1995): 6.
75. Elliott, p. 582.
76. Watkins, p. 319. Watkins mentions several studies confirming that between 19 percent and 61 percent of male sex abusers had previously been sexually abused themselves.

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