No One Like To Be Excluded Analysis

Creative writing -
‘’ no one likes to be excluded ‘’
There is a clear distinction between the appearance of belonging and the reality of an internal struggle. About a year ago I went to an all girls public high school for about 3 years. When I enrolled I was very keen to meet new people, have new friends and was beyond excited to show everyone how outgoing I can be. I started at this new school and within a week I had made a group of friends to sit and hang out with, a term went by and it honestly had felt like I have known these girls for a very long time, I felt like I can relate to them in so many ways and we would understand each other with certain things.
We did so much things together like go out for dinner, tell each other secrets,
take so many memorable pictures with each other and go parties together. Unfortunately after thinking this friendship will last a long time and everything would be just fine and thinking everyone loved me for who I am and seeing what I’m really like it all began to change. As I started to notice close friends drifting away from me and a lot of girls that I would usually talk to stopped giving me attention, I would walk past them in the playground and not even get a ‘’ hello ‘’ I would just receive a straight death stare. It all started to bother me. I started to wonder what it was that I had done, did I hurt anyone? Did I do anything bad?. A week went by and i had started to sit alone every day , in classes, lunch breaks, and recess, not one girl wanted to speak to me or even be around me , i started to feel excluded and not wanted, every time i walk into class the room felt so awkward and full of tension. Later on during the week, i was having lunch alone under the shelter until a group of girls approached me in an aggressive way and told me to stand up , i stood up and they said ‘’ what makes you think its okay for you to talk behind the girls backs the way you did '' i looked at them not knowing what they were talking about in confusion and asked '' what are you girls talking about?'' they said '' oh you know very well what we are talking about '' i didn’t answer back i just walked away and ignored it. I honestly had no clue about what they were talking about i know myself that i hadn't done anything wrong or said anything bad about anyone that’s why i was shocked and confused. After lunch i had an English lesson, and in my class were the same girls that approached me before, they were sitting behind me and i was sitting in front of them, i couldn't help but over hear their conversation, at first i heard mumbling then i could hear what they were talking about clearly, and apparently Ariana the girl i use to sit with that was a part of the group i was always with told these girls in my class that i am nothing but trouble who talks about a lot of people, and who just likes to cause drama, i was so surprised i mean one of the girls i thought i would be able to trust and especially think that she would never do something like that has let me down and made me seem so snobby and bitchy that’s why so many girls have looked at me with disgrace , but i still didn’t let it bother me because as i over heard these group of girls talking about it i said to myself '' i haven’t heard it come out of her own mouth with my own ears so i cant do much but ignore it '' .
Weeks and weeks went by I started feeling neglected and lost , going to school everyday and being accused of something that isn’t even true, having girls you were friends with and girls you had never even spoken to talk about how bitchy you are when you really aren’t and how much of a backstabber you are.
I started to feel so confused and didn’t know what to do, I never thought a girl like me would end up with no friends and feeling like she doesn’t belong, and feeling uncomfortable in a school environment and like she didn’t fit in at all with this particular crowd.
Nobody should be put in a position where they do not belong or don’t have any true friends. Nobody should be accused of something that isn’t even true just to make it seem like you are a bad person and have so many people making you feel guilty and depressed. No matter how small the issue may be its dramatic problems like this that lead to bullying and insecurity and making someone feel left out and upset about something that they haven’t done.
My mother always told me don’t believe everything you hear, if you haven’t heard it with your own ears or seen it with your own eyes then just ignore it and don’t let it bother you, for all you know the person you heard it from might just be trying to cause a scene and trouble for you to make themselves feel
better.
School holidays had just finished, it had been 3 weeks, I thought it would all have been in the past and girls would have forgotten by now what had been going on, but within an hour of school starting I already had trouble ahead of me, I started to cry, I ran to the bathroom and sat there alone ignoring everybody. I started hearing rumours about myself that I would never have even thought about, I was so anxious and scared I didn’t want this to get worse all I wanted was a nice friend I can talk to or someone who will be there for me. I couldn’t even go see the counsellor, even if I did I would have mean girls tell me I’m sook or crack jokes about me and say I’m just a depressed loser.
I had been attending school every day just for the sake of keeping focused on my school work and ignoring the fact that I had been hated on, as much as it hurt me as much as I was being harassed about it, I learnt that running away from my troubles isn’t going to help, so I decided to stand up for what was right.
One morning I walked into school and past the canteen to go sit where I usually sit, one girl approached me and it was Ariana, the one who had started all of this, and said that I was the girl everyone should watch out for, as she walked towards me I leaned over picked up my back and walked away before she even opened her mouth about anything. Later that day the ‘’ ring leader ‘’ that was apart of the group that had approached me days earlier, approached me on her own and said to me that I need to leave the school, nobody likes me im not wanted and that I don’t belong here. With all the tension building up I couldn’t handle it anymore I finally realised people are very judgemental about me and they do not know me personally at all & the fact that all these girls never got the chance to really see who I am, by just deciding to listen to one girl who is telling lies about someone who has never done anything to make her feel bad.
That afternoon I arrived home and my mother knew what was exactly wrong, she had gotten a phone call from the school earlier explaining what the trouble has been at school, the principal found out what was happening through a group of young girls who felt the need to let someone know that bullying had been occurring in the playground and that I was a victim of it all. My mum was shocked and surprised she did question why I never told her what was going on, and the fact that I didn’t even tell a teacher or counsellor is what made me feel anxious and scared, my mum told me that it is better off talking to someone when things like this happen, the longer you leave it the worse it gets and the more insecure you start to feel.
After going through 2 terms of feeling so excluded and not wanted by people who didn’t appreciate me I finally become a stronger person and told myself ‘’ I don’t live to please anyone ‘’ if people want to believe whatever they hear that’s up to them but only one person can judge me at the end of the day and that’s god. Although I know I will always become to a group that means the absolute world to me and that’s my family.

Hussna Darwich.