Perks of Being a Wallflower Making Connections

The quote “we accept the love we think we deserve.”(pg 24) Really made me think, it not only describes issues in the world, but also I can relate to it in my life. Sometimes I wonder why great people let themselves get treated so badly. It’s something that bothers me to a great extent. Why can’t we make them know they deserve more? So many people around the world believe it is okay to be abused by their spouses, friends, and partners, simply because they “set them off” or “deserved it”, like Charlie’s sister believed when she was slapped across the face by her boyfriend, even saying “but I love him!.”(25) to her parents when they found out. I can relate to this personally, not by being in love with a boy, and hurt physically, but having love for friends, in a sister kind of way and being abused mentally and verbally. I don’t like the fact that I thought it was okay, to be put down or talked about behind my back. I often thought that’s just what girl’s do, right? I have let it happen constantly throughout my life, but always went back, I guess it’s a cycle that never broke for me. Not even realizing that it is similar to people going back to their abuser. I always looked down on people who went back, but in some ways I’m just as bad as an offender as the next person. Charlie’s sister seemed to be stuck in the chain of abuse, as she went back to the person who abused her, even giving him her virginity, only days after being hit, and sneaking around to see him even after her parents forbid her from seeing him. I guess in some ways a lot of people think it okay to accept bad love, because it’s still love right? Or even bad attention like being called a whore and slut on facebook or twitter, and making yourself believe that it’s a good thing, because at least someone noticed you, right? I guess in the end we all need to understand the difference between good and bad love, and not getting stuck in the cycle of abuse whether it’s from friends, family or partners and the knowing that the key to this issue is not to accept the negative love that we think we deserve, but the positive love we actually deserve.