Poop
If none of these are similar to your "friend's" symptoms, then the "friend" in question has probably done enough damage to fit a Bad Friend Profile. These include:
Clingy "Friends." These cuddly little demons are often compared nettles, or anything smothered in rubber cement. You and this "friend" are basically forcefully inseparable. Removal can potentially be painful, as this type is likely to get intensely emotionally attached to you. Symptoms of clingy "friends" include excessive texting or calling, extreme and constant closeness, and the desire to know EVERY minute detail of your life.
Permanent "Borrowers." this type is usually very easily loveable because they always politely ask to borrow your things. And not only that, but its sweet really, that they want exactly what you have. Isn't imitation the highest form of flattery after all? Plus, we all have to admit that it's fun to be envied sometimes. However after you lend these "friends" your belongings, you will NEVER get those items back again. Symptoms of permanent "borrowers" include not returning your curling iron, not returning your favorite shirt, and conveniently "losing" the eyeliner you lent them (you will notice that their eyes sparkle with that exact color purple.....).
Forced "Friends." These are the "friends" that no one but you can understand. They are the ones whom you have known your entire life. You feel obligated to remain their friend, but when it comes down to it, you two really just don’t have anything in common with each other. Removal can be easy if done properly. Symptoms of forced "friends" include lack of interest, lack of conversation topics, and an awkward tension when the two of you are around one or both of your mothers (who undoubtedly set up the friendship to begin with and are now trying to keep it alive. Kind of like beating a dead horse. Trust me, it won't go any faster...).
Lay-Z-Boys: Just like the chairs, the most these "friends" will do is sit in your living
Clingy "Friends." These cuddly little demons are often compared nettles, or anything smothered in rubber cement. You and this "friend" are basically forcefully inseparable. Removal can potentially be painful, as this type is likely to get intensely emotionally attached to you. Symptoms of clingy "friends" include excessive texting or calling, extreme and constant closeness, and the desire to know EVERY minute detail of your life.
Permanent "Borrowers." this type is usually very easily loveable because they always politely ask to borrow your things. And not only that, but its sweet really, that they want exactly what you have. Isn't imitation the highest form of flattery after all? Plus, we all have to admit that it's fun to be envied sometimes. However after you lend these "friends" your belongings, you will NEVER get those items back again. Symptoms of permanent "borrowers" include not returning your curling iron, not returning your favorite shirt, and conveniently "losing" the eyeliner you lent them (you will notice that their eyes sparkle with that exact color purple.....).
Forced "Friends." These are the "friends" that no one but you can understand. They are the ones whom you have known your entire life. You feel obligated to remain their friend, but when it comes down to it, you two really just don’t have anything in common with each other. Removal can be easy if done properly. Symptoms of forced "friends" include lack of interest, lack of conversation topics, and an awkward tension when the two of you are around one or both of your mothers (who undoubtedly set up the friendship to begin with and are now trying to keep it alive. Kind of like beating a dead horse. Trust me, it won't go any faster...).
Lay-Z-Boys: Just like the chairs, the most these "friends" will do is sit in your living