Purity of Speech

Our words have a strong power. With our speech we have the ability to make worlds or break worlds. The Torah’s laws of speech make it possible for people to live together in peace and build close relationships. One who wants to create a serene home with a pleasant atmosphere should incorporate all the laws of shmiras haloshon into his actions and teach his family to follow suit.
We deal with so many people and situations on a daily basis that frustration with others is inevitable. The laws of shmiras haloshon forbid one from speaking derogatorily about others. Loshon hora may not be related to anyone, including one’s spouse. This can seem a bit extreme at times, however, the benefits derived from keeping the laws of pure speech are abundant. Shmiras haloshon increases the level of mutual respect among one’s friends, family, and co-workers. The level of closeness and trust is also increased as positive feelings are constantly being conveyed and acquaintances realize that just as you don’t speak negatively about others in their presence, you won’t speak negatively about them.
Our speech is so influential; it impacts our outlook, opinions, and attitude. One who speaks positively will view the world and all situations more positively. This will translate into having a happier home with a warm welcoming atmosphere. Children should be taught from a young age how devastating loshon hora is and how far reaching its damage can be. Children take their cues from their parents, so it is imperative for one who desires a peaceful home to refrain from speaking negatively about others. The parents should abstain from making disparaging remarks about coworkers and acquaintances. Even if something frustrating and unfair occurred at work one cannot speak derogatorily about those who caused him pain. In order to uphold the standard of proper speech it is important for all the members of the family to be familiar with the various laws. It would be a wonderful idea for a family to learn the laws of shmiras haloshon together. Not only will they gain knowledge and proper awareness but the children will see how significant shmiras haloshon is in that their parents set aside time to learn and review the laws.
Shmiras halashon instills in children confidence in the goodness of the world and other people. They learn to judge others favorably, forming a habit that will enhance every relationship in their lives. Not only is lashon hora prohibited in regard to individuals it is also forbidden to speak against a group. This can come into play when discussing neighbors and family friends. It is interesting to note that a statement can be considered derogatory simply because the speaker or listener considers them so. If parents know that something that they view as being neutral will be perceived by their children negatively they should refrain from commenting on it. Not only is speaking loshon hora a lowly act but listening to it is forbidden as well. Just as it is wrong to cause harm to others by way of speech, so too it is wrong to serve as a listener to potentially harmful information. If a family member begins to talk negatively about others he must be rebuked. If one accidentally heard lashon hora he is forbidden to believe the derogatory information. When any member of the household makes a disparaging comment about another individual he must be rebuked as neglecting to respond can constitute as agreement. By setting an example of positive communication, rebuking improper speech, and learning the laws of shmiras haloshon, parents will impress upon their children the importance of pure speech. This is the greatest gift because maintaining proper shmiras haloshon will impact everything in a child’s life. He will view the world as a positive place and be given the tools to build strong healthy relationships.
The laws of shmiras haloshon strongly impact ones thoughts and actions. They are capable of transforming a cynic into a positive happy individual. Shmiras haloshon has the power to create a peaceful home with strong relationships among its inhabitants. The benefits derived from keeping one’s speech pure far outweigh the momentary satisfaction of making a disparaging remark.