Our daughters are taught to be delicate, thoughtful, quiet and sweet. Our sons are raised…
Brooks goes against females to focus on males, while Tannen goes against males to focus on females. Brooks claims that, “Some of the decline in male performance may be genetic. The information age rewards people who mature early… Girls may, on average, do better at these things” (Brooks 11). On the other hand, Tannen admits that, “Whether women or men are direct or indirect differs; what remains constant is that the women’s style is negatively evaluated- seen as lower in status than the men’s” (Tannen 9). Brooks is suggesting that females mature faster than males, which is why they progress more than males. Tannen is suggesting, on a different note, that women are looked at different because of the way they speak, whether it be direct or…
Past families and past experiences also create a barrier to developing intimacy. Our close family not only affects our intimacy but so does multigenerational influences. Intergenerational Family Theory shows that this is true. Our relational functioning is passed down from generation to generation and each experience affects us and how we develop intimacy towards others.…
The way women converse varies greatly from the way men tend to converse. Even young girls and boys have very different ways of communicating with one another. Young children tend to play with other children of the same gender, and the boys and girls tend to have completely different social interactions with one another. Tannen states that “these systematic differences in childhood socialization make talk between women and men like cross-cultural communication, heir to all the attraction and pitfalls of that enticing but difficult enterprise (51).” We see in women and in young girls, talk creates intimacy and intimacy creates friendships, but men and boys tend to bond more on doing things with one another rather than talking to each other. Even the stance men take when talking varies from a woman’s.…
inherent and learned it seems to be associated with genetics but also through the expectations of society- women are expected to be more nurturing and caring.…
If the child’s first relationship is loving, the child develops the ability to love, if not, adult relationships will be unsatisfactory…
Women have a completely different view point then men. They aim to be accepted by others, they try to avoid conflict, and they tend to show that they understand what the other person is trying to say. For example, in chapter 6, Tannen begins to explain how in a comic, the two boys are fighting while a girl named Debbie is trying to be the peacemaker. She claims that she is looking for someone but the boys say that the person isn’t there. Even though she knows the person is there, she acts like she…
The main point is reached using cause and effect. Little boys are taught and treated differently from little girls. Boys hear messages about being strong even before they understand what that means. This is quite possibly the main reason men are insensitive or don't quite know how to show their feelings.…
In this chapter, Floyd (2011) discusses the many ways that gender affects interpersonal relationships. He describes is as a “defining feature of our identity, shaping the way we think, look, and communicate” (p. 51). It is explained that each gender culture puts emphasis on different parts of the relationship. Women come to value communication and closeness, while men value taking part in activities together (Floyd, 2011, p. 57). This makes sense when I think about how I communicate with men versus with women.…
Sameer Pandya in his article mentions that “The attributes that are most valuable today-social intelligence, open communication, the ability to sit still and focus-are, at a minimum, not predominantly male.” (Pandya, 201). He also mentions that “boys who remained close to their mothers, siblings, and peers did not act as tough or shut down emotionally. However, close relationships with fathers encouraged greater autonomy and detachment from friendships.” This shows that the fathers of these boys have been brought up in a like manner and always has been a trend in the past. Society teaches girls to shrink themselves, to make themselves smaller. Girls are allowed to have ambition and aim to be successful but not too successful otherwise the men will be threatened. Does the society actually see women as a lesser identity? If boys are taught to be tough, autonomous and stoic, what role would the girls play? Maids, perhaps.…
A boy longs for connection at the same time he feels the need to pull away, and this opens up an emotional divide. This struggle between his need for connection and his desire for autonomy finds different expression as a boy grows. But, regardless of their age, most boys are ill-prepared for the challenges along the road to becoming an emotionally healthy adult. Whatever role biology plays (and that role is by no means clear) in the ways boys are characteristically different from girls in their emotional expression, those differences are amplified by a culture that supports emotional development of girls and discourages it for boys. Stereotypical notions of masculine toughness deny a boy his emotional resources. We call this process, in which a boy is steered away from his inner world, the emotional miseducation of boys. It is a training away from healthful attachment and emotional understanding and expression, and it affects even the youngest boy, who learns quickly, for instance, that he must hide his feelings and silence his fears. A boy is left to manage conflict, adversity, and change in his life with a limited emotional repertoire. If your toolbox contains only a hammer, it's not a problem as long as all your equipment is running right or repairs call only for pounding. But as tasks grow more complex, the hammer's limitations become clear.…
I felt that the article was very much true to life. I agree that marriage seems to last a lifetime for the more educated and wealthy. I see all too often young adults getting married just because they have become pregnant or for the wrong reasons. This theory rarely seems to work. This usually causes problems for the young family because neither person is ready to take on the major responsibility that having a family at such a young age brings. This relates very close to my life because I was married and had my first child at the age of 16. With the lack of education and work experience that I had, it made it almost impossible to support and provide for my child. Needless to say, I found myself divorced and a 16 year old single parent six months later.…
Gender roles are taught to boys from the very day they are born. Parents treat sons and daughters differently. Little boys are taught to be tough. When little boy’s cry their parents might respond by telling him to grow up, and be a tough. However if a little girl did the same thing she would most likely receive more sympathy from her parents. A good example of this is in athletics. It is acceptable for a female athlete to cry when an injury takes place. But male athletes are usually made fun of for being “weak” or “sissies.” These expectations can be harmful to boys and men. According to Dennis Thompson, some studies show men and women share more emotional similarities than differences. When men are forced to hold in their emotions, they are more likely to suffer from high blood pressure, and participate in riskier behaviors such as smoking or drinking. ("Gender Differences in Emotional Health." EverydayHealth.com. N.p., n.d. Web. ) Boys and men should be allowed to grow up with non-stereotypical responses to their true emotional needs.…
Women are seen as emotional and thus are able to express their emotions in an accepted way. I can easily cry and have it shrugged off as no big deal, but the boys I know are told to toughen up. Men on the are restricted to be either unemotional or can only express emotions of strength, like anger. While men are restricted to these emotions, women are allowed to express all emotions. My friends cannot be sad or upset, whereas I can go from happy to angry to sad without major judgement. This double standard is clear in the way we as a society refer to a sensitive man. He can be called a “sissy”, “wimp”, “gay”, and can face bullying as a result of it. Additionally, there is a stigma attached to boys who are close to their parents. It’s deemed unacceptable to be a “momma’s” or “daddy’s” boy whereas girls can identify with those terms. I’ve offended my friend by calling him a daddy’s boy because, to him, it was a sign that he’s weak and dependent on someone else. The language we use to refer to boys that express themselves confines them into a tight mold they cannot break out of. This mold forces these boys to conceal any emotions that are deemed “weak” and creates a double standard between men and…
Anthropologist Margaret Mead addressed the differences in temperament found between men and women in her book Sex and Temperament in Three Primitive Societies (1935). In this study she concluded that sex has no bearing on social traits and the temperament of an individual. Her research looked at whether masculine or feminine traits are innate or learned. She also questioned whether men and women differ because of nature (heredity) or nurture (socialization). She concludes that cultural conditioning is more important than biology in shaping the behavior of women and men. The observed differences in temperament between men and women are not a function of their biological differences. Rather, they result from differences in the socialization and the cultural expectations held for each sex within a society.…