Similarities Between Everyday Use And Okeke

Many families have many traditions that pass through generations and while some are kept, others are lost throughout each generation. Traditions are more important to older generations rather than the newer ones. That is the theme of the stories – tradition. The narrator in Alice Walker’s “Everyday Use” and Okeke in Chinua Achebe’s “Marriage is a Private Affair” see the importance in their family’s tradition and when their children didn’t appreciate their traditions, they disowned them. Both the narrator and Okeke see the importance of their family’s traditions. When Dee/Wangero, the narrator’s daughter, comes to visit and points out all the traditional pieces with a sudden appreciation for them, the narrator is reminded of the history and
traditional values of it. When Dee touches the dasher for the butter churner, a part of it stood out. The narrator grabbed the handle and she saw that “there were a lot of small sinks; you could see where thumbs and fingers had sunk into the wood” (Walker 4). The churner is an heirloom in the family and there are indentations of the hard work that was put into the butter churner by the indentations on the handle. It has an even historical value to it since it came from a “tree that grew in the yard where Big Dee and Stash had lived” (Walker 4). Later on in the story, Wangero comes out with two quilts. On the quilt are “scraps of dresses Grandma Dee had worn fifty and more years ago. Bits and pieces of Grandpa Jarfelrs Paisley shirts. And one teeny faded blue piece, about the size of a penny matchbox, that was from Great Grandpa Ezra's uniform that he wore in the Civil War” (Walker 4). The narrator knows the significance of each piece of the quilt and the history behind it, from Great Grandpa Ezra’s uniform of serving the country to Grandma Dee’s dresses. In contrast, the daughter Wangero just views the quilts as artistic pieces, rather than each historical memento of their family. Similarly, Okeke in “Marriage Is a Private Affair” is in tune with his family’s traditions. Okeke’s family traditions include the arrangement of their children’s marriage. Nnaemeka, Okeke’s son, says “[Fathers] are most unhappy if the engagement is not arranged by them” (Achebe 1). Okeke wants a daughter-in-law with “good character and a Christian background” (Achebe 2). When Nnaemeka tells his father that Nene, his fiancée, is a Christian school teacher, it contradicts Okeke’s traditional and religious beliefs that “no Christian woman should teach” as St. Paul said to the Corinthians “women should keep silence” (Achebe 2). Nnaemeka, on the other hand, sees his fiancée in a modern aspect as she is educated and independent, rather than the qualities of the traditional belief of his father. Both the narrator and Okeke are in tune with their traditions of their families, while their children take a more modern twist and interpretation to their traditions. When it comes to the conflict with their children, both the narrator and Okeke repudiate their children when they didn’t adhere to their family traditions.
In the story of “Everyday Use,” Wangero makes a commotion about the quilts that she wants because of a sudden false appreciation for it, as it is artistic and in style with the times and with her discovering her roots. When Wangero continues to insist as she is going to hang them up and take care of them, the narrator “snatched the quilts out of Miss Wangero's hands and dumped them into Maggie's lap,” which shows that the narrator is not going to be bullied out of her historical family quilts (Walker 5). The child, Wangero, believes that her mother does not understand their heritage like her knew found appreciation for it. That causes the narrator to reply back “What don't I understand?” which shows that the narrator knows more than her new generation child (Walker 5). That remark of the narrator causes the Miss Wangero to storm off and for the narrator to disown her. The newer generation, which Miss Wangero is a part of, seems to believe that they know more about their roots and heritage, rather than the older generation who actually grew up with those traditional values and beliefs. Likewise, Okeke completely disowns his son when he hears of his love marriage to a non-Ibo teacher. From that encounter, “the father scarcely spoke to his son” (Achebe 3). His son ends of marrying the woman he disapproved of, tainting their traditional values. Okeke did not associate with his son Nnaemeka for “eight years” (Achebe 5). Nnaemeka did not believe in his father’s traditions, thus being part of the modern generation to marry for love, rather than having their marriage arranged. Both of the parents in the story did not let their child taint their traditional values, thus disowning
them. The conflicts between the generations affect the parent/child relationships. The conflict in both of these stories had to deal with the traditions of each family. The narrator’s historical and traditional quilts causes a conflict between her and her eldest daughter because she wanted to possess it for its new found artistic value. Okeke’s traditional Christian belief of an arranged marriage for his son conflicted because his son wants to marry in a love marriage. Both end up disowning their children because their children conflicted with their traditions.