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The Art of Loving

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The Art of Loving
The Art of Loving
In Erich Fromm's novel, The Art of Loving, the author tackles the task of defining what exactly is meant by the word love and what it means to love someone. He begins by presenting his theories on love and how they apply to the different areas and aspects of life. He then explains how these theories should be applied. The author's account is very convincing and gives readers a clear understanding of what exactly love is and how they should use his explanation in developing their own love lives.
He begins by asking, "Is love an art? Then it requires knowledge and effort. Or is love a pleasant sensation, which to experience is a matter of chance, something one "falls into" if one is lucky?"(Fromm,1) In the first short chapter, Fromm sets up what exactly he intends to explain in his book. First he dispels all of the false characteristics, impressions and attitudes that people tend to have towards love. He blames the many "failures of love" that occur throughout people's lives on these false views of love. He presents the idea that love is an art, and as with any art, it requires knowledge and effort. Fromm continues on by stating there are three steps in this learning process: Understanding the theory, learning its applications, and applying it to real life. Individuals must realize that love isn't something that just happens. It requires practice, and through this practice a true understanding of love can be developed.
In the second chapter, Fromm presents his lengthy discussion of the theory of love. He asserts that man is a social being. Human beings were not meant to be alone and love is the answer to this "aloneness" which causes intense anxiety. "The deepest need of a man, then, is the need to overcome his separateness, to leave the prison of his aloneness" (Fromm, 9). This feeling of anxiety can be resolved in many ways. The first is through an orgiastic state, often through the use of drugs or alcohol. A second is the conformity of the

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