According to the Oxford Dictionary, the definition of forgive is to stop feeling angry or resentful toward someone for an offense, flaw, or mistake. However, there is a deeper meaning to this. Contrary to some of Harold S. Kushner’s statements, I believe that forgiveness is as beneficial for the victim of the crimes as it is for the offender. In fact, I am far more inclined to agree with Jose Hobday’s views. He states that …show more content…
each time you remember the crime you must forgive it. To refuse to forgive someone would mean that each time the victim remembers the crime, he or she would renew the grudge and internal anger. I believe that someone cannot live a peaceful life and strengthen their relationship with God if he or she is constantly renewing antipathies.
Last year, on the last day before graduating from Holy Name School, we had a class retreat. Everyone went over to the church, and one of our parish priests talked to us. He said that we were at a crossroads because many people were going to different high schools. He then told us that to be able to remain friends in the future, we would now have to forgive each other for all the little conflicts that had arisen in eight years together. Otherwise, these resentments would grow over time, and it would only spur memories of disagreement. This was very moving for me. I now fully realize that resentments grow exponentially over time if they are not addressed and forgiven.
While reflecting on the novel and the above experiences, I have found that I most relate with Jose Hobday’s views. I cannot honestly answer the question of what I would have done in Simon’s place because I was not there and couldn’t fathom the unspeakable tortures that he and his companions endured. Consequently, I cannot judge whether his actions were right or wrong. The first step I always take in making a decision is to gather information about the situation. Since the plot of the novel occurred over seventy years ago, it would be impossible for me to make a fair judgement of Simon’s actions with the hindsight of what would later happen in the war, the information that would later come to light about the horrors of the Holocaust, and the unspeakable pain, trauma, and sorrow that Simon must have felt in enduring the atrocities of the Nazi reign of terror.
While I do not judge Simon’s actions as right or wrong and cannot imagine the pain and suffering he went through, I think that I would have forgiven Karl for my own peace just as Mr. Hobday stated. With my experiences so far in life, I would have had to forgive him because I could not peacefully live with that moral burden. As Mr. Hobday stated, forgiveness is of the heart. To me, this means that someone’s request for forgiveness stays in the victim’s heart. Until they can let it go, they are still living in the power of the crime, instead of coping with the repercussions of it and continuing with life.
I am also furthermore inclined to agree with Mr. Hobday’s views about who forgiveness benefits. He shares that his mother told him, “Do not be so ignorant and stupid and inhuman as they are. Go to an elder and ask for the medicine that will turn your heart from bitterness to sweetness. You must learn the wisdom of how to let go of poison.” I interpret this as the elder representing God, the medicine being forgiveness, and the poison being the sin committed against him. Only with God’s help can we grant forgiveness to the wrongdoer, and let go of the sin that now is a part of us until it is forgiven. Over time, that poison will slowly consume us if we do not forgive it. We should not give in to the wrongdoer and live a life full of bitterness and hatred. Instead, rise above the wrong and forgive it with God’s help. To answer one of the underlying questions that came up frequently in the responses, Mr. Hobday and I both agree that forgiveness is for the victim’s own peace.
In conclusion, The Sunflower was an interesting way to contemplate the very nature of forgiveness and what it means to me.
It is necessary to forgive every time a wrong is remembered. Resentment will grow over time if someone can’t forgive. I believe that until forgiveness is granted, the person cannot live at total peace with God. I can’t judge Simon’s actions because I was not there in his shoes, but I think that forgiveness to me is for the victim’s benefit. However, I think that I would have forgiven Karl for my own peace. Only in forgiveness can the victim truly let go of the wrong and continue with their
life.