By
Irene Deutsch
Attachment Styles and Relationships 1
This paper will discuss how early relationships affect adults relationships later on
in life. It will elaborate on the three dimensions each relationship has and they are
passion, intimacy and commitment. The paper will include Robert Sternberg’s triangular
theory of love.
First, there are three types of attachments one may develop when we are infants.
The first one is secure attachment. This manifests itself when an infant is with his or
her mother and happily explores an unfamiliar environment. Furthermore, when the
mother leaves, the infant will become distressed. On the other hand, when the mother
returns, the infant runs to her and then continues playing (Bolt, 2004).
Next, there is another type called avoidant attachment. These type of infants do
not show distress when removed from their mother. They also do not cling to their
mother upon reunion. They react to strangers in the same way they do with their mothers.
They keep their attention focused on their toys (Bolt, 2004).
The last type is called anxious attachment. In unfamiliar settings, these infants
cling to their mother and cry when she leaves. However, when she returns, they are
hostile. They do not explore their environment. These infants may continue to cry even
after being picked up (Bolt, 2004).
Attachment Styles and Relationships 2
Furthermore, in adults relationships there are also three types. The first one is
secure adults. This can be expressed when these adults find it easy to become close in a
relationship. Their relationships are characterized by happiness, trust and friendship.
They can accept and support their partners despite faults (Bolt, 2004).
Next, the next type is avoidant adults. They are less invested in relationships and
more likely to leave