Analyzing The Essay My Father's Tribal Rule

Name Professor Course Name Date Conflict and Struggles Teens and young adults are engaged in many different conflicts and struggles with their parents regarding various beliefs and values. In the essay “My Fathers Tribal Rule” by Mark Mathabane, he tells of his childhood where his father wanted his way and was not open to change. He wanted to bring his boys up the same way he was raised; Doing many different rituals and obeying all of his father’s household rules. Mathabanes father expected from Mathabane and his brother George, the same as his father did of him. Many times children in their teens and early twenties become engaged in conflict and struggle with their parents regarding personal beliefs and values. This experience is common because children at this age are trying to establish themselves in the world and are learning to think on their own. There are many different things that can cause disagreements but I have found house rules, friends and religion to be some of the most prominent ones.
In our ****s we all have different rules for our children to live up to while under our roof.
My two children are young adults now and our struggle with house rules is the curfew at night. They have a different definition of late than me and their step-dad. We require them to be at **** during the week by 10pm and on the weekend by 12 midnight. I feel that any later than that they are just asking for trouble. In Mathabanes situation, his father required them to be quiet while at the table. Mathabane says, “Iintentionally broke one of these laws: I talked while eating.” Here Mathabane is testing these house rules and is in turn given the punishment that breaking the house rule calls for. In my children’s case, I take their car keys for some
time. Besides the curfew rule, our house has a friends rule. My children don’t really have a problem with my rules on what friends that they have. I require them to bring them over to my house before they can go out with them. If I do not like them, then they are not allowed to hang out with that person. I feel I know best for them.Mathabane was embarrassed by his parents, because of the language that they spoke. Mathabane explains by saying, “I began seeking ways of distancing myself…I decided I would no longer, in the presence of my friends speak Venda…I began speaking… the language of my friends.” He disobeyed his fathers rule by speaking another language other than the house language of Venda. In return he had to suffer the consequences of breaking that law. If my children go out with friends that I don’t approve of, I take their cell phone away and that keeps them from talking to those particular friends. In addition to these two rules, we also have a rule but not really noted a rule in our ****, that we all attend a Baptist church, and that the children are not allowed to attend other churches that are considered “cults”. As long as I am paying their way then they also have to attend church at the minimum of once a week. My children do not have a problem with this rule as they don’t have a real desire to go to other churches and really enjoy the church we are involved in. My friends have had problems with their children, because their children wanted to be members in other types of churches other than the family church. In Mathabanes situations, he hated his fathers religion and the rituals that his father required him and his brother to perform. He says it by quoting, “at first I tried to resist the diet, but my father’s severe looks frightened me.” As there are struggles and conflicts between teen, young adults, and their parents, there are ways that parents can address the issues of religion, friends and household rules in a positive way. Mathabanes father was not trying to make living by any of these things a positive experience. He was a very selfish man and wanted his way. Rules do not have to be a bad thing, and children can grow up to respect those rules and the parents that made them stick to them. Work Cited Mathabane, Mark. “My Father’s Tribal Rule.” The User’s Guide to College Writing; Reading, Analyzing, and Writing.2nd Edition. Eds.Kreml, Nancy M. et al. New York: Custom Publishing, 2008. 42-46. Print.