The author of the article is Andy Borowitz, born January 4th, 1958. He is an American comedian. He wrote the article “Alarm Bells” to “The New Yorker”, edition Sept. 26, 2011, about net dating. The article has a very ironical angle told by the main character, who might be the author himself in 1st person. But is it all irony? The story “Alarm Bells” is an ironic story about net dating. It shows many aspects about net dating such as prejudices and expectations. Especially expectations! The story shows how the broad society using net dating have transformed into these cocoon-people, who only show their outside and wont let anyone in unless they live up to their requirements. But it’s not only bad, it’s also a funny story with a lot of irony, perhaps even with a good message – Give each other a chance to show who you really are.
This example is how the entire article is, irony with a twisted humour, “if a woman invites me to her place for dinner, I'll ask if she wants me to bring anything. I do this for two reasons: (a) to be polite, and (b) to see if her answer sets off any bells of the alarm like variety. One time I asked this question and the woman e-mailed me back the following list: (1) duct tape, (2) large "contractor style" garbage bags, (3) shovel, (4) chainsaw. Whoa! Do I heed to spell out what that ring-a-ding-ding sound I started hearing was? Not only did I not bring those items but I bailed on dinner and blocked her on Facebook. Maybe I'm too uptight, but I think a first date is a little early in a relationship to expect someone to bring such nice gifts (1st column, line 40 to 2nd column, line 7).”
The quote shows that the main character follows a pattern. He always asks if he has to bring something. The answer he got was not what he wanted though. He judges the girl far too quickly, even though he has never met her. It’s a possibility that she was just making fun of him, and meant it as a joke to break the ice. But