Preview

But What Do You Mean?

Good Essays
Open Document
Open Document
1780 Words
Grammar
Grammar
Plagiarism
Plagiarism
Writing
Writing
Score
Score
But What Do You Mean?
1. What is Tannen’s purpose in writing this essay? What does she hope it will accomplish?
From what I gathered Tannen’s purpose was for us to comprehend the importance of communication in the work field. How the simplest verbal functions can be interpreted in many different ways. “Conversation is a ritual” I find so much meaning behind these four simple words, the article in its entirety are summed up by these word. Tannen wants to enlighten us to remember that our words are powerful. I believe she wants us to take back control over what we say. We are as infants and Deborah is as our mother, giving us our first words. Not to mention it seems as if she wants to open up the doors for men and women not only in the work place but in their homes; to become more aware and willing to really communicate with one another.
2. What does Tannen mean when she writes, “Conversation is a ritual”?
To interpret what she said I will try, to be precise I cannot say. Ritual is a word commonly used to describe costumes that continue to portray. My dad would say to me oh you’re doing your ritual of putting on your face. Deborah means that the way one talks is a sort of a habit, never changing unless we intentionally hold back on what we say or may say. By saying ritual she is showing that communication like rituals are instilled and influenced by your upbringing, environment, people around you, place of origin, and not to forget the people you associate with. She is giving her reader a powerful statement by using a metaphor that helps depict her thesis.
3. What does Tannen see as the fundamental difference between men’s and women’s conversational strategies?
She states there are many different aspects to how men and women communicate. Yet there seem to be an underlying consensus that men never want to feel they are at the bottom of the conversation. Women on the other hand don’t mind as long as there is “give and take” in the conversation. Deborah literates “The logic is that when you

You May Also Find These Documents Helpful

  • Good Essays

    Peyote Hunt Summary

    • 298 Words
    • 2 Pages

    By Nadel’s definition a ritual is any behavior that has become stylized or formalized and thus made repetitive in that form (239). It can be construed to function as a rigid and precise enactment of symbols…

    • 298 Words
    • 2 Pages
    Good Essays
  • Satisfactory Essays

    |Women pay attention and listen to the whole conversation |Men listen to what they want to listen to |…

    • 1014 Words
    • 5 Pages
    Satisfactory Essays
  • Good Essays

    Can differences in communication between men and women be defined as black and white? Deborah Tannen’s essay “But What Do You Mean” divided the biggest areas of miscommunication between men and women into seven categories, three of which caught my attention for personal reasons. As examined, women have a habit of apologizing to maintain a pleasant atmosphere. Tannen expressed how men and women react to complaints, as well. Jokes were also discussed, suggesting that men razz each other to maintain a one-up position; however, women’s jokes tend to put themselves down. Regarding Tannen’s description of these three communication categories, my personal experiences fall more within a grey area rather than assigning themselves to black and white roles.…

    • 584 Words
    • 3 Pages
    Good Essays
  • Good Essays

    Deborah Tannen

    • 490 Words
    • 2 Pages

    Secondly, Tannen does observations that allow her to show how men and women tend to have discussions. While men tend to be more joking, women talk more about their problems. “When…

    • 490 Words
    • 2 Pages
    Good Essays
  • Better Essays

    You Just Don’t Understand Women and Men in Conversation by Deborah Tannen is basically an explanation on how women and men converse. Tannens main goal is to give advice to the different genders in order for them to avoid as much conflict as possible. Tannen’s main ideas are to explain how differently women and men react to each other’s way of being. It’s like they’re in their own little world while living in the same big world. Men tend to try to dominate situations and tend to always want to be at the top. Women do not tend to want to get into conflict but tend to show understanding. These big differences bring them into conflict. A Tannen explains, “What he wanted conflicted with what she wanted”. (40) Women and men are constantly clashing in opinions.…

    • 1042 Words
    • 5 Pages
    Better Essays
  • Good Essays

    In Debrah Tannen’s essay on “Why Is It So Hard For Men and Women to Talk to Each Other,” she tries to inform us of this lack of communication between men and women and the problems that it can cause. The author starts off by giving the reader an example of a situation involving a man and his wife where the husband would comment on how much his wife is the talker in the family and how she is always talking when she is at home. This demonstrates that men generally talk more in public situations, while women tend to talk more at home. She follows up by talking about how most of the women that divorced gave lack of…

    • 656 Words
    • 3 Pages
    Good Essays
  • Good Essays

    There are some distinct differences between how men and women use and understand communication. There are differences in how we approach, laugh, or relate to a conversation based on the genders of each party that may arise in some challenges. Understanding of how each gender interacts with certain topics makes…

    • 612 Words
    • 3 Pages
    Good Essays
  • Satisfactory Essays

    Check It

    • 975 Words
    • 4 Pages

    a. How would you define the author’s purpose? Besides paragraph 15, in what parts of the essay is that purpose most apparent?…

    • 975 Words
    • 4 Pages
    Satisfactory Essays
  • Good Essays

    In this chapter, Floyd (2011) discusses the many ways that gender affects interpersonal relationships. He describes is as a “defining feature of our identity, shaping the way we think, look, and communicate” (p. 51). It is explained that each gender culture puts emphasis on different parts of the relationship. Women come to value communication and closeness, while men value taking part in activities together (Floyd, 2011, p. 57). This makes sense when I think about how I communicate with men versus with women.…

    • 635 Words
    • 3 Pages
    Good Essays
  • Good Essays

    A major disparity between men and women is their conversation goals. Women always want to share everything, but men do not. For instance, a woman likes voicing everything she thinks and how she feels. Moreover, the women like to tell story what happened in a day and she want her partners can feel and understand her story. In contrast, a man does not really want to share what is going on in his mind, except that the conversation is inevitable. In contrast, men do not want to share his…

    • 588 Words
    • 3 Pages
    Good Essays
  • Satisfactory Essays

    To conclude with, I would say that the differences between men and women –in their communication styles doesn’t mean that one’s sex whether it be man or woman is better than the other; it simply means that both styles of communication are equally effective to that gender.…

    • 108 Words
    • 1 Page
    Satisfactory Essays
  • Satisfactory Essays

    Metamessages

    • 303 Words
    • 2 Pages

    Deborah Tannen is a professor of sociolinguistics at Georgetown University. She is the author of several popular books about the way people in social situations talk to each other. By studying these interactions, she attempts to help others to understand them and so get along better in relationships.…

    • 303 Words
    • 2 Pages
    Satisfactory Essays
  • Powerful Essays

    English

    • 2524 Words
    • 11 Pages

    communicate with men when in a relationship. She suggests that men are more talkative when…

    • 2524 Words
    • 11 Pages
    Powerful Essays
  • Good Essays

    Damned If You Do

    • 880 Words
    • 4 Pages

    In my Chemistry class, there are two students who always ask make remarks or ask questions about the topics discussed: a male and a female. When the male student asks questions, the people in my class sit quietly and listen to the professor’s explanation, but when the female student asks questions, the class—including myself— gets annoyed. They begin to roll their eyes and sneer. Even my professor seems to be annoyed at times. Often I hear my classmates complaining about her during break. They nag about how much she interrupts class with her foolish questions and interpretations, yet no one complains about the male classmate. I thought to myself, “Maybe he asks better questions than she?” But after a few weeks I began to realize that the intelligence of their questions and comments tends to be the same. So why do my classmates favor the male student’s remarks over the female student’s? Everyone has their own way of saying things, however the way we hear what a women says is often completely different in comparison to how we would hear it if a man had said it instead.…

    • 880 Words
    • 4 Pages
    Good Essays
  • Satisfactory Essays

    Embrace Racial Identity

    • 120 Words
    • 1 Page

    I think the main topic of this work was to embrace your racial identity, and be accepting of people of no matter their skin color. You should judge someone on their character and not the color of their skin.…

    • 120 Words
    • 1 Page
    Satisfactory Essays