com essay
Peer Review
Peer Review of Eric Fanning
Good base for ideas
**Need to emphasize moral aspects more****
Evaluation:
1. The writer’s central argument is that the story of Snow White has been warped as time went on. The main question is if the moral aspects of the story have been watered down from the Grimm version to the modern day films. The central claim is that the moral being taught through the tale have been lost in a sense, as the stories become more geared towards entertainment than a way to teach.
2. I think the main strength is in the idea of the essay itself, which gives a good base to explore ideas. I think that the argument is original, as well as thought provoking.
3. An aspect of the essay that could use work is in the analysis. If more attention was brought towards the moral aspects which were lost, the paper would be very well written.
**Elaborate on the specific things which were lost in the story as each new version came out***
4. The essay is debatable and compelling, for it uses three different and vastly altered versions of the tale of Snow White.
The only thing that needs work is that the essay is mostly summary of the stories and stating their differences, but what needs to be added is the significance of what was changed with each new version.
Editorial Questions:
1. What was significant about the changes made in each tale? Were the changes drastic enough to alter the entire meaning of the story? **write more about this!!*
2. What does it reflect on the audience? If a story is being changed from a fairytale to teach children morals to an action movie made for entertainment reasons, does it say something about how people have changed?
3. Rather than just 3 paragraphs of synopsis of the stories, could you add a 4th which elaborates on the significance of the differing versions?
Peer Review of Eric Fanning
Good base for ideas
**Need to emphasize moral aspects more****
Evaluation:
1. The writer’s central argument is that the story of Snow White has been warped as time went on. The main question is if the moral aspects of the story have been watered down from the Grimm version to the modern day films. The central claim is that the moral being taught through the tale have been lost in a sense, as the stories become more geared towards entertainment than a way to teach.
2. I think the main strength is in the idea of the essay itself, which gives a good base to explore ideas. I think that the argument is original, as well as thought provoking.
3. An aspect of the essay that could use work is in the analysis. If more attention was brought towards the moral aspects which were lost, the paper would be very well written.
**Elaborate on the specific things which were lost in the story as each new version came out***
4. The essay is debatable and compelling, for it uses three different and vastly altered versions of the tale of Snow White.
The only thing that needs work is that the essay is mostly summary of the stories and stating their differences, but what needs to be added is the significance of what was changed with each new version.
Editorial Questions:
1. What was significant about the changes made in each tale? Were the changes drastic enough to alter the entire meaning of the story? **write more about this!!*
2. What does it reflect on the audience? If a story is being changed from a fairytale to teach children morals to an action movie made for entertainment reasons, does it say something about how people have changed?
3. Rather than just 3 paragraphs of synopsis of the stories, could you add a 4th which elaborates on the significance of the differing versions?