Hi!
My name is Paul Saver, the Founder of Parent Teenager Relationship Saver and welcome to parenting tip #5 titled: "Emotion Coach Your Teenager"
Let me say from the outset, you don't have to be a psychologist or a certified life coach to emotion coach your teenager to get instant and positive results that can transform your parent teenager relationship.
So why emotion coaching, you might ask? There are two powerful reasons. The first one is that through emotion coaching, you can raise the emotional intelligence of your teenager. People with higher emotion intelligence are better equipped to handle life and relationships.
Secondly, most parenting advice actually targets behavior and for very good reasons. However one needs to realize that underneath behavior there are emotions and feelings. Also most people are driven but what they feel rather than what they think is right or wrong. Emotion coaching your teenager taps into their feelings and therefore you can more naturally make a connection.
So with that knowledge, I want to ask you to ask yourself a question as follows: “do you prefer to raise a child to become well-behaved and compliant or to create an emotional bond where you can actually come to really understand and trust each other?”
If you chose the latter, keep watching this video. I want to share with you seven quick steps to emotion coach your teenager.
Step One
Choose an experience, past or present, where your teenager is clearly sad, angry, or fearful.
Step Two
Describe your observation to your teenager, targeting their emotional state. Speak in a calm voice. For example: “hey Joe you looked really angry when you arrived home yesterday. I noticed that you hurt your sister when you joked about her weight and you almost broke the glass door when you slammed it.”
Step Three
Ask a quick question to get your teen to confirm your observation for example: “So Joe, is it true what I am saying?”