Throughout the book the main character D-503 is awakened, through the mysterious actions of the character I-330, to a mysterious, unquantifiable universe which not only transcends the One State’s mathematical world but also possesses a certain beauty through its mysteriousness. As he explores this new world he also begins to explore, through the use of his diary, his inner self. He sees in himself the same mysterious world he sees in I-330, and begins to expand his knowledge of himself.
In doing so, he is forced to identify himself as an individual and therefore deviates from the One State’s collectivist philosophy. However, he seems afraid of this awakening, and in his fear he retreats from his new awakened aspects of himself, creating a schism between his old self and his new, awakened self.
One of D503’s very first experiences with the unknown is through I-330. He sees evidence of a concealed, mysterious world in I330’s psyche that contrasts the honest openness expected by the One State. When D-503 first saw I-330 he described “a strange and irritating X” on her and that he “couldn’t give it any numerical expression”. In D-503’s mathematical universe x is the symbol for a variable, a value that can change, a value that cannot be determined at the start. Likewise D-503 finds it hard to determine I-330’s value, that is her inner thoughts and feelings. He agonises over “what is behind her blinds? (her eyes)” and complains that I-330’s behind “an ancient opaque wall….. I don’t know what is (behind) there.” It seems natural that D-503 would find I-330’s mysteriousness shocking in the One State ciphers are encouraged to act “openly and honestly” and “thievish mystery” is blasted as “cowardly”.
The mysterious world that D-503 sees in I-330 is not just