Examples Of Guilt In The Holocaust

Survivor Guilt in the Holocaust

The Holocaust refers to the mass genocide of Jews that prompted World War II. However, it was not only Jews who were sent to concentration camps. Any who dared to smuggle an ounce of meat, those who were highly educated, those who helped Jews, or those who simply did not look Aryan enough were also sent to the death camps. Hundreds upon thousands were killed, but a handful of every one of those thousands survived. They were spared because of their skills; skills that were needed by the Nazis. These people, exceptional seamstresses, carpenters or linguists, were plucked from the general population at the concentration camps and had their talents abused to benefit the Nazi regime. Others were spared simply because
they were lucky enough to escape gassing at roll call, or to not catch one of the many diseases going around the camps. The survivors of the holocaust have proved to be as strong as humanly possible. Strength is what characterises survivors of the holocaust. It is impossible to imagine what they saw or how they felt. These people were lucky to have survived; yet, at times, their memories have made them think otherwise. These survivors feel guilty that for some reason they were chosen by fate to live, above parents or children or siblings or friends. Many believed that they were not worthy to live and that others should have survived, that others who had been more admirable should have lived instead. They suffer from a psychological disorder, a mentally debilitating and stressful disorder, called survivor guilt.

The traumatic events that had plagued concentration prisoners during the Holocaust were psychologically scarring. Following the liberation of the concentration camps in 1945, Holocaust survivors set forth on their newest journey - on the quest for a new life, home, and family. Often they suppressed the trauma they sustained during the Holocaust, pushing it to the backs of their minds, distancing themselves from the terror and the grief to embrace their new lives. Despite their best efforts to "move on," however, for many this shroud of wellness eventually gave way to a number of emotional and psychological difficulties. The events that happened so long ago are still fresh and vivid in memory to many. Life at the camps was full of uncertainty and anxiety. People were gassed on arrival to their camps, some had months of torment before a slow and painful death from a disease, fatigue, starvation or eventual gassing because they were sick and weak. There were so many deaths for different reason; however, there were a small percentage who somehow managed to get just enough food, just enough water, who were just strong enough to survive the camps. Despite each aspect of the camps that were meant to eventually kill them, they lived. The conditions were so un-hygienic that any disease would spread throughout the entire population, slowing killing each person; unless they were sent to the gas chambers before they caught it. Those that were healthy to work, would be punished with demanding physical labour, they would be worn to the bone trying to complete this work, and when they were ready to keel over and die of exhaustion, they would be gassed. The small percentage that did survive lost their family and friends, and almost all were sole survivors of their loved ones. With no-one to go to, many tried to start a new life, often with a clean slate in a new country. “I moved to America, hoping that I could start a new life, away from the terror I endured.” - Holocaust Testimonies: The Ruins of Memory
Moving to a new country, knowing no-one would be hard enough alone, but most of the survivors feel forever guilty that they made it through hell, while others perished in the most horrible surroundings. It is the horrendousness of the Holocaust that makes people believe that they should be dead, like every other victim of the Holocaust.
“It is understanding the torture they went through and coming out of it alive, while others died. Knowing that what they went through, no human should have been able to survive. This is what makes survivors guilty.” – Aaron Haas
In the fictional novel, Sophie’s Choice by William Styron, we follow Sophie, a survivor of the Holocaust. She lived in Germany occupied Poland, and although her family was not Jewish she was cruelly affected by the Holocaust. Her father and husband, both intellectuals were both killed by the Nazis. Sophie was sent to Auschwitz, along with her children for smuggling ham to try to help her dying mother. While at Auschwitz she was chosen, out of hundreds of thousands, because she was multi-lingual. She lived in the house of the commander of Auschwitz, along with several others who had talents that for some reason made them ‘worthier’ than the rest. “She could never justify to her own satisfaction why she survived Auschwitz while the other perished.”
Although even many years after the war, Sophie could not logically reason why she was so different and deserved to live. She did not let her feelings become known, as she thought there was something wrong with her. “Why do I feel this, all the time? It never goes; it is perhaps the worst thing the Germans left me with. I know I must be happy that I am alive and am loved, but everyday I cry for my family.”
The guilt she feels, even when the Holocaust has long been finished, lives on as alive as ever in the corner of her mind. Her self -esteem was broken down during her time with the commander, and had never regained a chance to rebuild itself, even when she moved to America. She met Nathan, a seemingly perfect man, most of the time. But he was mentally unstable and was prone to bouts of extreme anger, which he took out on a meek and mentally frail Sophie. She believed it was because of her that he was angry, even if he beat her and jeered her, she would not believe that she wasn’t to blame for his outbursts. “She’s crying’ and apologizing’ and he’s screaming and swearing’ at her, dragging her by the arm and hitting her, all while she’s saying she’s sorry, all the time! ‘Nathan, I’m sorry! I’m sorry!’ They made quite a noise, they did.”
When she was accompanied by Nathan, she was bubbly and outgoing, but when he was taken away, she could not cope. While he was in a good mood, he was her social lifeline. Sophie had been scarred by the memories of the holocaust, not knowing who to befriend, not wanting the pain of losing them. She did not feel worthy of a supportive network of friends, she felt she was selfish and cowardly, as she valued her own life above others.

Although she was what looked to be a pillar of strength on the outside, she was being eaten away on the inside. She was emotionally and mentally broken by the time she was allowed to go from Auschwitz, her self-esteem at the depths of despair. She had placed the deaths of all at Auschwitz on herself, as a survivor, knowing that others were worthier of life. She watched on as at roll-call time, people were selected for the gas chambers, they were beaten and mocked. She could feel their terror as she helplessly looked on. She could feel her heart ripping and mothers were torn away from their children being sent to their deaths. Always wondering what it would be like for her to be down with them. Each time a thankful thought popped into existence inside her head, she felt guilty and sinful, knowing that she shouldn’t be thankful for something she has no right to. After placing such a burden on her already battered shoulders, she was crumbling underneath it. By the time the trauma of a violent relationship and lack of trust in everyone, it was inhuman to bear. To cope, she turned to drinking, trying to forget the vicious memories of her days in the house at Auschwitz, looking on as others were gassed and were forced into hard labour. The final nail in her coffin came when she was forced to choose which of her children would live for a little longer in the concentration camp, and which would be gassed immediately. Her decision was one that no person should ever be forced to make. For the rest of her life, she lived with a decision that could never be honestly justified. The pain and suffering brought upon her by the guilt she felt as a survivor of the Holocaust and as the sole survivor of her family caused her to take her own life. “She laid there…cold and stiff, her pain had finally ended.”

Although Sophie was a fictitious character, many survivors of the Holocaust share the same feelings. Aaron Haas conducted a study in survivor guilt in the Holocaust and found that many could not logically reason why they were able to just survive long enough in the camps to be liberated, while other perished. I left him there and I survived [prolonged weeping]…I try to justify my act with a practical approach. Can anybody understand it? (Langer, 1991)
These people were often physically strong enough to survive the camps, but after liberation, many were mentally and emotionally weak. Like Sophie, many people did suffer from survivor guilt; their feelings were much the same as what is portrayed in the novel. Guilt can be the trigger of many other physical and psychological disorders as well as impair social skills and self-esteem levels. Anger is relatively common among people with survivor guilt. Having not found a way to vent their guilt, it manifests itself as anger, turning it over and over inside them. “I could never forgive myself... I had good connections in Auschwitz... but I didn't do enough to save my brother. He was with me from the beginning, but with all the connections I had, I couldn't save him. This makes me angry…” – Jack D (servant to the camp over-seer).
Guilt can also trigger low self-esteem which often leads to depression, anxiety disorders, panic attacks or bipolar disorders. These disorders can drastically impact on the daily lives of survivors. Often, when guilt triggers one or more of these disorders, people cannot function well in social situations, have good peer relationships or be understanding of others. Some survivors segregate themselves from others, convinced that no one could empathize with or comprehend their ordeal. To cope with the stress and social inept they turn to alcohol, drugs or abuse others. These many feelings and disorders guilt causes means that survivor guilt is not just guilt; it is hundreds of different emotions, some good and some demeaning inside the already distressed mind of a survivor.

The Holocaust was a blemish on history, an act of archetypal evil.
Forever there will be those who feel resentment and hatred towards those involved in creating it. Concentration camps were places where humans should never have needed set foot in, let alone live, and for many, die in. Survivors somehow managed to beat the odds and live for up to years with almost no food, water or sleep; in diseased bunks; undertaking harsh physical labour and being lucky enough to escape the gas chambers or firing line at morning roll call. They are unsure how and why they survived, they appreciate the fact that they did. They attribute their survival to sheer luck in most areas, such as being chosen to the gas chambers or become human rifle practise, but there was often more involved than just luck, but being able to survive on so little, and to stay mentally strong, even while their families and friends fell victims of the camps around them was a feat of human capabilities. Now, so many years on, their lives have been rebuilt. No matter how hard it was initially, to feel it was not their fault, the guilt is slowly fading. It will never fully be gone, as the Holocaust will never be forgotten, as years go by, families grow; survivors accept their fate more and more. Time heals all
wounds.

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