Gods Existence

The belief in the Christian Gods existence has been a controversial issue for a very long time. The Holy Bible is a lot of things to a lot of people. To some, the Bible is a self-contradictory book about cultures from the distant past. Others, such as Christians, believe that it is a guide on how to live their daily lives and it is a source of inspiration. I personally believe that the existence of God is nonsensical. "If the truth is that ugly - which it is - then we do have to be careful about the way that we tell the truth. But to somehow say that telling the truth should be avoided because people may respond badly to the truth seems bizarre to me." --Chuck Skoro, Deacon, St. Paul's Catholic Church. This essay will consider various arguments about the existence of God and point out some of the flaws as to why I struggle to believe in Gods existence.
I entertained the idea of myself being a Christian once upon a time. I would occasionally spend some time worshipping God and I actually enjoyed the idea of being a Christian. It was about four years ago when I had the epiphany that I should no longer call myself a Christian.
I rarely prayed or did the things Christians do, but I was determined that I was in fact a Christian. So one day, I had attempted to go body boarding, since it was my first time; I was far too cocky and unaware of the dangers of the ocean. I went out, a bit too deep for a beginner. Therefore, I got caught in a current and was dragged out to sea. I started to panic and repeated the same prayer over and over, “God, if you help me out of this sea, I promise to be a better Christian and change the lives of many people. I will spread your word to every new person that I meet.” I’d say, the fact that I’m writing this essay, proves that I survived that day. So I believed that God had heard my cries for help and had saved my life.
A whole month had gone by and I hadn’t been to church once that month, I didn’t spread Gods word. God didn’t even cross my mind once. Until the day I needed something from Him again. I finally realised I couldn’t call myself a Christian. I wasn’t committed to it and I wasn’t prepared to put the effort in. The next thing I realised was that I shouldn’t be thanking God for saving me that day in the ocean. I should be thanking my brother. He was the one that dragged my exhausted, limp body out of the ocean. It was realisation after realisation, and then the doubt in Gods existence continued.
I used to spend a lot of time talking to as many people as I could about religion. So many of my friends claimed to be Christians, yet they would swear, consume alcohol and even have sex. This was the breaking point for me. I saw Christianity as a gateway to hypocracy and I started to hate religion, to a point where I would show emotions of anger. I am fully aware that not all Christians are hypocrites, but the seed had been sewn and I was stubborn.
There is no physical proof of Gods existence. If you were to tell a Christian that their God doesn’t exist, the majority of them would ask you to prove it, but are they capable of providing proof that God does in fact exist? The simple answer to that is, no. The only proof of God is faith. The only evidence of Gods existence is faith.
As young children, some of us are taught the foundations of Christianity, that God is good, he is the one true powerful God. We were also taught that we cannot blame God, yet we should always give thanks and be grateful for what he has given us. I find it to be one of the biggest contradictions. If God were in fact real and he was in control of every single thing that happened in the world, he would be a complete and utter monster in my eyes.
I say this because 7 months ago, my cousin, Ursula, had lost her 56 year old mother to cancer. Ursula was 8 months pregnant at the time and one month later she had given birth to a beautiful baby boy. It was a complicated birth, baby William was born with only one kidney. He needed extra medical attention and my cousin was having a really difficult time. When William was four months old, they had come all the way from London to visit us. I wanted to help Ursula as much as I could so I babysat William for a few days. I became very attached; we didn’t have a crib for William here in Cape Town, and so we made a makeshift bed out of continental pillows on the floor. One night I had put him to bed and I had fallen asleep on the floor next to him, with his tiny hand gripping onto my forefinger. These were happy times, and then about two months ago, they found out that William had a 4.4cm x 3.5cm x 2.9cm tumour in the centre of his brain. Usually they would try treating something like this with Chemo Therapy, but William only had one kidney, so this option wasn’t advised.
In the end, the doctors had no answers for us, only that William has about two months left to live. So if God does exist and is in control, why would he do this? And why would people worship someone responsible for this? I don’t believe that a non-existing being did this. I believe it is all due to the complicated ways of science. A quote by Epicurus summarises this paragraph quite well I believe, “Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent. Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent. Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil? Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?”
The human population is free to believe in whatever they please. Many people do believe in the existence of God. It’s something for them to believe in and it provides them with a strict moral code and a way of life. I suppose something to remember is, “An absence of proof is not proof of absence.” There may be things that I don’t know about this religion, but with the information I have, or the lack thereof in regards to Christianity, I choose not to believe.
The whole crux of Christianity is to believe that God is the one true God and people should love only Him. Christianity is based on a foundation of love and honesty, this would be one of the more beneficial things Christians follow and believe in.
In conclusion, I personally believe that religion was created and pursued due to our inability to comprehend everything that happens in the universe. I believe that humans by nature are followers, we are like sheep. That is why I believe the idea of God was conceived. This idea of God replaces a void for our incomprehension of things that happen around us. I have one last quote that I believe will summarise this essay in its entirety. It is found in one of my favourite books, “The Gargoyle” by Andrew Davidson. The quote is as follows, “There is no logical reason to believe in God. There are emotional reasons, certainly, but I cannot have faith that nothing is something simply because it would be reassuring. I can no more believe in God than I believe an invisible monkey lives in my ass; however, I would believe in both if they could be scientifically proven.”