Monologue Of A Victim Analysis
To the man that raped me, I forgive you.
You may have read that title with confusion and thought to yourself “How could you forgive someone who did that to you?” or “Wow, she must be really strong.”
I forgave him over time. It was probably one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. And just because I forgave him doesn’t mean I’m strong, it means that I’ve worked through my feelings. I’m not strong. I ignored what happened for months. I denied it and refused to talk about it. I wouldn’t call that strong.
We were dating, I didn’t know that you could be raped while in a relationship. I thought he was just being a boy and wanted to have sex with his girlfriend.
When I told my story to my counselor and she explained that it was rape. This blew my mind. But what am I supposed to do with this? Act like the victim? No. I refuse to plea “I was raped, feel bad for me.” That’s not how I am. I don’t want people to look at me differently or feel pity for me. Yes, I forced to have sex against my will but I refuse to have a pity party. I will move on and know the signs if I see it happening again or to a friend. …show more content…
Like what?? Before this I only struggled with anxiety and now I find this out? Like how do I deal with all of this.
I didn’t handle it well. I shut down. I didn’t talk about it. I cried. My week was ruined. As I think back to the time with that boy, I remember all the details. I remember all the times that he assaulted me. But not all at once, they come in waves. As I was writing this blog, I remembered another time that it happened. Yes, it happened more than once, I dated him for over a year and the first time was at 6 months.
You’re probably thinking “why stay?” because I thought I loved him and that he loved me. He convinced himself and me that he loved me, but if he loved me he wouldn’t have forced me to have sex with
You may have read that title with confusion and thought to yourself “How could you forgive someone who did that to you?” or “Wow, she must be really strong.”
I forgave him over time. It was probably one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. And just because I forgave him doesn’t mean I’m strong, it means that I’ve worked through my feelings. I’m not strong. I ignored what happened for months. I denied it and refused to talk about it. I wouldn’t call that strong.
We were dating, I didn’t know that you could be raped while in a relationship. I thought he was just being a boy and wanted to have sex with his girlfriend.
When I told my story to my counselor and she explained that it was rape. This blew my mind. But what am I supposed to do with this? Act like the victim? No. I refuse to plea “I was raped, feel bad for me.” That’s not how I am. I don’t want people to look at me differently or feel pity for me. Yes, I forced to have sex against my will but I refuse to have a pity party. I will move on and know the signs if I see it happening again or to a friend. …show more content…
Like what?? Before this I only struggled with anxiety and now I find this out? Like how do I deal with all of this.
I didn’t handle it well. I shut down. I didn’t talk about it. I cried. My week was ruined. As I think back to the time with that boy, I remember all the details. I remember all the times that he assaulted me. But not all at once, they come in waves. As I was writing this blog, I remembered another time that it happened. Yes, it happened more than once, I dated him for over a year and the first time was at 6 months.
You’re probably thinking “why stay?” because I thought I loved him and that he loved me. He convinced himself and me that he loved me, but if he loved me he wouldn’t have forced me to have sex with