My Crucible Experience

I remember the day clearer than any other. I was in 5th grade. My mom sat me down and told me my father would be living in another home. They called it “temporary.” “It will end” “It is not divorce”, they said. This, age nine, is when the constant packing, unpacking and swapping from house to house began. This lasted about a year until my Dad moved back in. We were whole, again. That was the happiest month I can really remember. Having two parents say goodnight to me, not having to repeat each story twice, and meals with someone at each head of the table. Everything was perfect. Until we decided to all go out to a family dinner. At this dinner my parents dropped one word.

Divorce.

I am the oldest of three. If I had to chose the toughest part of this situation, easily, it would be seeing the look on my sister's face across the dinner table. Watching, what seemed to be the happiest kid alive, smile fade into an expression of pure shock. Her face went pale. I remember how hard it was to hold back the tears, in order to appear strong for my younger siblings.
As a ten year old, it was my responsibility to be there for my sisters. None of us wanted our parents to feel guilty, so we tried to keep how we felt just between us. For at least a month both of my siblings slept in my bed with me, so I could comfort them to sleep.

While my sisters had me for them to talk to, I had no one. This left me alone with my feelings. I had to be a wall for my siblings to lean on. I had to remain strong and standing, I had to provide constant support. Although, as a ten year old it was hard to be alone and go through all of this, the situation shaped me into a much more independent individual. I had to be there for myself and in the end this made me the strong person that I am today.

I am fifteen now and I have experienced five years of this permanent arrangement. It is safe to say my parents are not on the best terms. I am their form of communication. A constant messenger, and constantly yelled at for the messages. They get mad at the deliverer not the sender. If that is not bad enough, I am dragged in the middle of all the conversations. I am exposed to too much information about court and finance for any fifteen year olds’ good.

The purpose of this essay was to write about a crucible.
Something difficult I have gone through that changed me. Although, in the beginning it was extremely difficult to cope, I believe this experience changed me for the better. It has shaped me into the person I am today. Being the oldest of three in a broken family has forced me to become a role model, and taught me to take on large responsibilities. I learned how to use my independence for the better of my siblings. I learned how to cope with difficult people, I learned how to put on a happy face, I learned how to leave my family life at home. I learned how to be happy with my friends and at school. I learned how to smile through the day, ultimately being content with my life. I gained the strength to look at the pros and not the cons. This unfortunate situation has caused me to become a more positive person. If I could give one piece of advice to
anyone:

Smile and laugh through struggles, I promise, it helps.