My Trailer: A Narrative Fiction

Jamie’s black truck pulled outside my trailer. The roar of the pipes blocked out the sound of the water that poured from the gutter. The storm was over, but it had been one of the strong ones that made people talk about the tornado. Five years ago one hit so strong that three gas stations and twelve houses were destroyed. The middle school was thrown into the sewage treatment plants fence. All the damaged buildings were rebuilt, nothing ever leaves Carson. “Lily, are you ready to go? I ain’t waitin’ on you all day.” Jamie yelled and slammed his car door. His voice carried through the walls like he was beside me. “One minute.” “Damnit, Lily, I want to get to the party before all the beer is gone.” My screen door banged against the frame.
His boots slapped against the laminate flooring of the hallway. “You’re throwing the party, Jamie.
It isn’t going anywhere.” “Not the point, sugar. Why do you have makeup on? Ain’t no one for you to look good for but me.” His hair looked like it hadn’t been washed in days. He was wearing the black cut off he wore every Saturday night, his lucky drinking shirt. He grabbed my waist and pulled me to him, I could smell the beer that was never washed out of his shirt. I remembered the first time I met him. We met at one of his parties two years before when I was a sophomore. I was there for over an hour before Jamie made his way to where I sat by the fire. Tabby had disappeared with her boyfriend, Kasi was passed out on the hood of her car, and Gretchen stumbled out of the woods with Greg. Her jeans weren’t on her body. The fire was dying and the temperature had dropped. It was the darkest part of the night and the clouds blocked out the mood. The wind cut through the thin fabric of my
sweater.

“Hey darlin’, I’m Jamie Clark,” he said and sat on the log beside me. I could smell the leather from his red wings, his black shirt clung to his body. His hair was just a little too long and fell into his eyes. “I know. I’m Lily.” “You aren’t dressed for a party, Lily.” He left me for a minute and came back with a blanket. It was black and scratchy and smelled like it had never been washed, but I wrapped it around myself.
“No one had sex on this did they?”
He laughed. “No.” “Can’t be too sure.” “Why haven’t I seen you here before?” “I don’t party, I was dragged here by some of my friends.” “It’s a good thing you’re here. My dad’s real into me having a party every weekend, and it would have been real lonely sitting by myself all night.” The screen door banged and I followed Jamie out of my house. The air was thick with the smell of the sewage treatment plant. The smell was always the worst when it rained, like the fresh water angered the shit by daring to come out of the clouds. The smell seeped into every part of the town including the halls of the new school. The kids smelled like the raw shit every afternoon when they went home. The party was on top of mountain up Jamie’s family holler on top of a mountain. Gretchen was sitting on Lee’s lap. Her black panties hung out of the rips in her jeans. Donna laughed when she knocked over her red cup and fell into Zack. Austin walked to the woods with Aly thrown over his shoulder. Several other people whose names I didn’t know drank and danced around the fire. “Ryan, my man, Lily didn’t tell me you were coming.” “She didn’t know.” “You didn’t tell me.” “It’s hard to tell you anything when you never have enough time to call me back.” “I’m busy.” “What are you doing after you graduate?” Ryan asked. “She’s going to go to the community college and get her nursing degree.” Jamie put his arm around me. “We don’t need anything too fancy, do we, Lil?” “I thought you wanted to be a teacher?” “I did, but things change.” “I guess they do.” Ryan walked away from the party.
Jamie made his way to the keg. I followed Ryan. His white truck glowed in the dark. He sat on the tailgate and patted the spot beside him. He smelled like fresh laundry, not the musk that Jamie had worn since he became a car salesman. The lightening bugs were all around us. One landed on his hand and glowed. I thought about the last time we had been in the bed of his truck. He graduated high school two years before and moved to the beach to go to school. I threw him a going away party the day before he left. Jamie and I had only been dating a month at the time. The party lasted long into the night, but in the end Ryan and I were the only people awake. Gretchen was asleep in a tent in the woods. Jamie was passed out in his truck. Ryan and I sat on the tailgate of Ryan’s trucks and watched the sun rise. “I’ll be with you in two years,” I said. “We’ll have the best time, Lil. It’ll be so great to be away. I’m going to miss you.” I laid back in the bed of the truck and closed my eyes. The sun rose behind the trees and started to light the sky. The truck moved with Ryan’s weight. He ran his hand across the exposed part of my stomach. He kissed me and I kissed him back. He moved on top of me and pulled my shirt over my head. I struggled to unbutton his pants and he pulled them
off. “Are you sure?” Ryan asked.
The sun was above the trees and bright behind him. I nodded my head and tossed his shirt in the pile beside us. Something crashed by the fire. Jamie laughed in the distance with a cup of beer in hand. I looked at Ryan, the moon lit his clean-shaven face. His button up was opened at the top letting his chest show. He still had on the friendship bracelet I’d made him when we were ten. The thin blue and green string was faded and looked more like two strings than a bracelet. “Lil, are you coming to South Carolina after you graduate?” “I don’t know, Ryan. Jamie is here and my family. It’s just easier to stay.” “What about me? We’ve had this planned for years. You’ve pretty much ignored me for the past six months.” “What do you want me to say?” “I want you to tell me why you’re so scared to come to South Carolina. Why won’t you be with me? You’ve been in Carson for two years not talking to me and screwing the prodigal son because you feel bad for having sex with me two years ago. Jamie is shit, he was shit then and he is now. He’ll never leave this town.” “Ryan, I never meant to hurt you.” “But you sure as hell meant to fuck me. We had plans.” “But Jamie loves me.” “Jamie loves everyone.” I walked back to the party. Music was blaring and the fire was bright enough to light the way back now. Ryan sat on his tail gate, the glow from the sun in front of him. He was so handsome. I felt bad for cheating on Jamie, but a part of me longed to go back to Ryan. Another part of me wanted to stay with Jamie. He drank too much and would never leave Carson, but it was a life that was easy and planned. Jamie was upside-down chugging beer from the keg when I made it back to the party. The fire had died down and made Jamie’s features unrecognizable. The crowd counted how long he chugged and beer soaked his lucky t-shirt. He had started drinking heavy after he graduated last year. He was accepted to all of his top choice colleges, but he’d never committed. He put it off until he started working at the car lot with his dad. Now he never mentioned anything other than taking over the family business. The people holding Jamie in the air lowered him to the ground. Gretchen stood watching, her dark eyes never left him. She clapped and moved closer and whispered something in his ear. He nodded his head. Jamie hadn’t looked my direction. The people surrounding the keg moved off in different directions. Jamie and Gretchen walked toward the woods behind me.