Personal Narrative: Guilt Of Aborting A Child

For 20 years, I carried the guilt and shame of aborting a child at the age of thirteen. I was not aware that this decision would alter the course of my life forever. One morning, I cried “Father forgive me” for killing your child. I asked for forgiveness for many years, but this time was different. I felt God’s presence confirming that I had been forgiven and it was time to forgive myself. Since that day of redemption, I have been a licensed foster parent. For the past 3 years I have had the opportunity to foster a child. Naja was born to a 13 year old homeless mother. She enjoys worship and praise at home and at church. The adoption of Naja will be final on July 8, 2010. Naja’s side kick is named Darrell. He is my
3 year old foster son and has been in my home for one year. The old scares on his body are stories of physical abuse. Darrell receives unconditional love and he is learning to pray for the abusers. Darrell is preparing to be re-united with grandparents.
This separation will cause the family pain, but the joy in seeing him reunited is worth it. I have forgiven myself and realize that sacrificing my own child was part of God’s plan for my life. His unconditional love and divine intervention healed me and I want to share the healing. The healing starts with providing a safe and healthy environment; and teaching about God’s love.

Upon receiving a Leadership and Ministry degree my life would be changed because it would allow me to be spiritually prepared and equipped for my future adventures in Foster care.