Specialized Parenting Research Paper
Specialized Parenting
What Makes Us Extra Special
When I talk about anything concerning my children there are two words that come up more often than others; extra and special. Raising a child with special needs requires extra care. For example, one might have to keep an extra close eye on their baby’s breathing while they sleep. Others might also have to do some extra things to care for their children, like buying specialty weighted blankets that help calm them down. This is an amazing transformation from average to extra special. Being a parent of special needs child requires extra time, attention, and patience.
A lot of us spend countless hours bonding with our newborns through an incubator or wearing surgical gowns and …show more content…
masks. These parents walk into the NICU feeling slightly overwhelmed, but luckily they get trained professionals to help them once there. “The hospital staff can help you handle your baby through openings in the isolette (a special nursery bassinet).” (Nemours, 2011) We may have to take our precious bundles of joy home with hospital monitors or oxygen machines. We spend a lot of time worrying in surgical waiting rooms filled with other terrified parents. Most of our social interaction actually takes place in this room around the coffee machine. We share stories, pictures, and well wishes with the other parents waiting for their child’s name to be called, signaling them that their child is out of surgery. When a parent hears their baby’s name called it’s like a mad dash to those looming operating room doors to hold their sweet little one in their arms again.
Aside from the medical horrors a special parent will face, they might also be introduced to the world of therapy. My son had three therapists from 3 months old to 3 years old. We saw them each once a week to practice physical, developmental, and speech abilities. These parents will become therapy experts of sorts. They will see a chance for therapeutic play in everything they do. Every toy they buy will have an educational or therapeutic value. Every single toy, book, game, song, or even plain household chore turns into a therapy exercise.
Most regular families have issues with sibling rivalry or children acting out when there is more than one child. This is usually worse when one of those children has special needs. The child with special needs requires a little more attention and time than a child with average needs. It’s not hard to understand how that might cause issues with the other children’s’ behavior. As the parent one must teach their children without special needs why and how the parents have to spend extra time or attention on their special needs sibling. They might be jealous and upset at first, but once the parents take the time to help them understand that they are not more important, but they must have a little more time, they usually become more helpful.
Many of us find that our special kids will have behavioral problems as they get a little older.
I’ve been kicked in the jaw in the middle of Kroger a time or two, but a parent can’t discipline a special child with negativity and expect to get anything but a negative response from them. In fact, “Many studies have shown that physical punishment — including spanking, hitting and other means of causing pain — can lead to increased aggression, antisocial behavior, physical injury and mental health problems for children”. (Smith , 2012) Instead, they must remain calm and repeatedly insist on what behavior they do want from them. One must hold firm to what they ask of them without giving in to the tantrum. They must be patient and realize that just like with learning to walk or talk, it might take that child many years before he/she will understand and be able to comply. The worst part is learning to ignore the evil stares these parents will undoubtedly receive from onlookers, but they must stay focused on only that …show more content…
child.
When a special child starts school their parents’ stomach is tied in knots every day for months on end.
They wonder if he’s being stared at, if she’s being pointed and laughed at, or if someone could be hurting this child. It’s terrifying to think that for once, you can’t be right there to protect them. They wonder how good their teachers are and if they’re really working hard with that child to learn what he/she needs to learn. They spend extra time checking in on his class, attending her individualized education plan meetings, parent/teacher conferences and meetings, doing the same homework pages repeatedly until they know they really tried; the list never ends. They will devote all of you energy to making sure they know what’s happening and they are involved with what is happening with their child’s education and entire school
experience.
So, who do these people become after all is said and done? Special parents become strong and determined individuals. They don’t give up at any cost. These parents know how to adapt and adjust. They take things as they come and accept what they cannot change. They change what they have the ability to change. They love with every ounce of their souls. These parents forgive and forget the little things that never really mattered anyway. They learn compassion and understanding. They are emotional wrecks half of the time and strong, brave, warriors the other half of the time. They are regular people that have been transformed into amazing parents because of our extra special children.
To raise a special needs child one must transform into an extra special parent. This parent must learn right along with their child as he/she learns. They must be strong and brave. They must learn patience and understanding. These parents must stay focused and grow some tough skin. They must adapt and adjust as life never goes the way you want it to. They have to be that “super parent” that everyone knows doesn’t really exist. They will have to have more time, energy, money, love, patience, and care than you ever imagined possible. These people must become just as special as their child is and be thankful every day that they get to experience this extra special life they have been given.
References
Smith , B. L. (2012, April). The case against spanking. Retrieved from http://www.apa.org/monitor/2012/04/spanking.aspx
Nemours, K. (2011, October). When your bab 'ys in the nicu. Retrieved from http://kidshealth.org/parent/system/ill/nicu_caring.html
What Makes Us Extra Special
When I talk about anything concerning my children there are two words that come up more often than others; extra and special. Raising a child with special needs requires extra care. For example, one might have to keep an extra close eye on their baby’s breathing while they sleep. Others might also have to do some extra things to care for their children, like buying specialty weighted blankets that help calm them down. This is an amazing transformation from average to extra special. Being a parent of special needs child requires extra time, attention, and patience.
A lot of us spend countless hours bonding with our newborns through an incubator or wearing surgical gowns and …show more content…
masks. These parents walk into the NICU feeling slightly overwhelmed, but luckily they get trained professionals to help them once there. “The hospital staff can help you handle your baby through openings in the isolette (a special nursery bassinet).” (Nemours, 2011) We may have to take our precious bundles of joy home with hospital monitors or oxygen machines. We spend a lot of time worrying in surgical waiting rooms filled with other terrified parents. Most of our social interaction actually takes place in this room around the coffee machine. We share stories, pictures, and well wishes with the other parents waiting for their child’s name to be called, signaling them that their child is out of surgery. When a parent hears their baby’s name called it’s like a mad dash to those looming operating room doors to hold their sweet little one in their arms again.
Aside from the medical horrors a special parent will face, they might also be introduced to the world of therapy. My son had three therapists from 3 months old to 3 years old. We saw them each once a week to practice physical, developmental, and speech abilities. These parents will become therapy experts of sorts. They will see a chance for therapeutic play in everything they do. Every toy they buy will have an educational or therapeutic value. Every single toy, book, game, song, or even plain household chore turns into a therapy exercise.
Most regular families have issues with sibling rivalry or children acting out when there is more than one child. This is usually worse when one of those children has special needs. The child with special needs requires a little more attention and time than a child with average needs. It’s not hard to understand how that might cause issues with the other children’s’ behavior. As the parent one must teach their children without special needs why and how the parents have to spend extra time or attention on their special needs sibling. They might be jealous and upset at first, but once the parents take the time to help them understand that they are not more important, but they must have a little more time, they usually become more helpful.
Many of us find that our special kids will have behavioral problems as they get a little older.
I’ve been kicked in the jaw in the middle of Kroger a time or two, but a parent can’t discipline a special child with negativity and expect to get anything but a negative response from them. In fact, “Many studies have shown that physical punishment — including spanking, hitting and other means of causing pain — can lead to increased aggression, antisocial behavior, physical injury and mental health problems for children”. (Smith , 2012) Instead, they must remain calm and repeatedly insist on what behavior they do want from them. One must hold firm to what they ask of them without giving in to the tantrum. They must be patient and realize that just like with learning to walk or talk, it might take that child many years before he/she will understand and be able to comply. The worst part is learning to ignore the evil stares these parents will undoubtedly receive from onlookers, but they must stay focused on only that …show more content…
child.
When a special child starts school their parents’ stomach is tied in knots every day for months on end.
They wonder if he’s being stared at, if she’s being pointed and laughed at, or if someone could be hurting this child. It’s terrifying to think that for once, you can’t be right there to protect them. They wonder how good their teachers are and if they’re really working hard with that child to learn what he/she needs to learn. They spend extra time checking in on his class, attending her individualized education plan meetings, parent/teacher conferences and meetings, doing the same homework pages repeatedly until they know they really tried; the list never ends. They will devote all of you energy to making sure they know what’s happening and they are involved with what is happening with their child’s education and entire school
experience.
So, who do these people become after all is said and done? Special parents become strong and determined individuals. They don’t give up at any cost. These parents know how to adapt and adjust. They take things as they come and accept what they cannot change. They change what they have the ability to change. They love with every ounce of their souls. These parents forgive and forget the little things that never really mattered anyway. They learn compassion and understanding. They are emotional wrecks half of the time and strong, brave, warriors the other half of the time. They are regular people that have been transformed into amazing parents because of our extra special children.
To raise a special needs child one must transform into an extra special parent. This parent must learn right along with their child as he/she learns. They must be strong and brave. They must learn patience and understanding. These parents must stay focused and grow some tough skin. They must adapt and adjust as life never goes the way you want it to. They have to be that “super parent” that everyone knows doesn’t really exist. They will have to have more time, energy, money, love, patience, and care than you ever imagined possible. These people must become just as special as their child is and be thankful every day that they get to experience this extra special life they have been given.
References
Smith , B. L. (2012, April). The case against spanking. Retrieved from http://www.apa.org/monitor/2012/04/spanking.aspx
Nemours, K. (2011, October). When your bab 'ys in the nicu. Retrieved from http://kidshealth.org/parent/system/ill/nicu_caring.html