Summary Of Confronting Without Offending

Abstract

Pegues (2009) Confronting without Offending uses Bible content and proper Christian living in addressing conflicts caused by transgressors. Central theme in the book is to illustrate how to confront someone in personal and direct contact in creating a connection between conflict and mediation, and harmony and discord. Pegues stresses the importance of using the word of the bible for facing conflict. Confronting those challenges requires planning and tact, which she defines throughout her book. By providing examples and how we can use different methods in resolving those particular situations. Like in any good relationship, communication is key in airing grievances and expressing our feelings. Pegues (2009) states: “The problem is
Dictators, rule with absolute authority with very little in the way of collaboration. Meaning, my way of the highway approach to win-lose scenarios, the dictator personality will always find a way to win and the ability to be flexible with others is a challenge for them. Dictators do have their place as pointed out by Pegues with Jesus and temple merchants disgracing themselves and God. Accommodator personalities seek to please others but compromise their own needs leading to co-dependency. Maintaining the relationship at all costs is paramount leaving the individual vulnerable and susceptible to losing their own beliefs, morals and values. Learning to properly balance decisions making and building self-esteem and confidence is key here. Accommodating is best used when fighting a battle, you cannot win as opponents refuse to budge or acknowledge problems. The abdicator, runs, hides and gives up or yields. This type fails to either truly recognize a problem exists, does not understand the nature of the problem fully. Abdicating should be temporary, sometimes gathering ones’ thoughts and formulating a solution is necessary. The Collaborator, works together toward a common solution. A well-balanced leader, who clearly shows care and concern to fellow
Purpose, gather your facts, make sure you have a timeline of events that is factual and relevant, stay on topic be precise. For example, at work, pick to meet in the boss’s office behind closed doors, and present your issue or case to them in a professional matter. Illustrate how the mission and or other employees may be negatively affected including yourself. Second, own the problem, speak on your own behalf about what, why and how this situation is affecting you. Be steadfast in your belief that what you are doing is right. Speak the right word, be factual, precise and professional, know your audience first and recognize any differences, perhaps religiously or culturally. Prepare questions to be easy to understand and that continue a conversation. Criticize constructively as well as receive criticism. Any mistakes admit and move on, do not dwell. The PACE personality profiles are passengers (phlegmatic), attendant (sanguine), captain (choleric), and engineer (melancholy). Part 5 includes selected scenarios, confronting methods on addressing