Bullies usually escape punishment if they abuse verbally and do not leave physical bruises and broken bones to prove the presence of abuse. Intimate conversations are not as valued as sexual intimacy, and dramatic or traumatic moments often leave us speechless.
Liberation psychology teaches us how to use and appreciate the power of language with integrity. Integrity is the key word, because without it, the power of language is abused. Integrity, or honesty, in self-expression, eliminates deception, manipulation, judgmental accusations, abusive tongue lashings, and lying. Our orientation toward this communication system, therefore, must be to preserve its integrity by being respectful and honest with the information that gets transmitted through it with the intention of understanding it and having intimacy with it.
The exchange of information should not be geared toward hostility and conquest. Thoughts aren't supposed to conquer feelings, feelings are not the enemies of thoughts. Pretense is not to replace truth even when we don't like it, and discovery is for understanding not for blame. By using the power of language to inform so that we will be understood and known, rather than to establish superiority or dominance, intimacy becomes the goal of the exchange. Language used for intimacy becomes the goal of the