Why the Relationship Between John and His Son Johnny Has Failed

Crying. Not doing well in school. How did it all happen…at whose fault? Why

has the relationship failed! In “ The Father” by Hugh Garner, John has failed his job as a

father to his son, Johnny. John has completely responsible for the failure of his

relationship with his son, due to his selfishness, drunken behaviour, and general

irresponsibility, in raising his son. John does not care about Johnny, and does not take

position, for a role model towards his son. Being selfish can be a good thing at times, but it can also create an emotional

barrier between others, causing a failure of relationship. John always cares about his

status, and for him not to look bad in front of others. John’s selfishness results in him not

caring about anyone else, but himself. John is always aware of what people might think of

him: “‘God knows what the neighbours must think of me,’” (p67) he says, when his wife

tells him that Johnny is afraid to ask him to go to the banquet. In general, a parent would

have talked with their child, of why they were afraid, but no…not John! In a way, Johnny

might have been afraid to ask his father, because his father never goes anywhere with

him. In the same fashion, John tells his wife, “‘I don’t want these goons down at the

church thinking I’m too cheap to buy him one’” (p66) about Johnny’s uniform. Again, in

a sense, he doesn’t want to look poor, or like he can’t afford the uniform. He’s so worried

of what others might think of him. Not to mention what he does at the principal’s office.

At the meeting “ the principal intimate[s] that the boys slowness might be caused by

tensions at home, but this he vehemently denie[s] ”(p66). By the discussion of tensions at

home, John denies it so he would not be blamed. He also doesn’t want to give the

illusion to the principal, that he’s a bad parent. But not only that, he didn’t even think

about his son. He never thinks of the condition Johnny is in, and back him up. Overall,

John has an extreme importance of him not to look bad. Even if it means to forget your

own family. John’s selfishness has led Johnny to be afraid of his father.

Drinking brings sense of enjoyment, but no one knows the hidden reasons that are

proceeded behind it. In a case, John drinks to hide his feelings, but his drunken behaviour

leads to inappropriate and embarrassing actions which severely impacts his son. First of

all, John is going to the church drunk, when he thinks that “ he knew it was only a fuzzy

sentimentally brought on by what he drunk” (p68). Nevertheless, he also drinks during

the banquet. He was really drunk! That is when all the drama starts. When Johnny wins

the award, John is proud, so he “ grasps the boys hand, and facing the audience, [holds] it

aloft like a referee, signifying the winner of a box out”(p75). That is too much for Johnny,

he is ashamed. At the fast that his father his drunk, Johnny is embarrassed by his actions.

But of course, that isn’t all. When John walks back after giving his son the award, “ he

turn[s] around [ the tables] end, stagger[s] slightly, and [falls] against it, pushing the

planks askew…” (p75). John should have taken that seriously, however he makes the

whole thing into a joke. On the other hand, Johnny was disappointed. John’s drunkenness

may have brought laughter to him, but not to Johnny.

Drinking can not only hurt one, but it can highly effect others as well. Due to

Johnny’s fathers drunk behaviour, Johnny is upset, disappointed, and totally ashamed,

causing him to lead his father away from others, and not be seen with him. Throughout

the banquet, “ Johnny hardly [speaks] to [ his father] at all, but attache[s] himself

conversationally to a boy sitting on the other side of him” (p75). For Johnny the fact that

his father never talks to him, has let him down, resulting in him talking to the boy, not his

father. Also, since his father is drunk, he doesn’t want anything inappropriate or

embarrassing to happen. Moreover, he was looking at the art, and “ as soon as [his father]

reached his side, Johnny [took] him away from the others…” (p71). Comparatively, when

John is looking at his son’s art, others come on by, and he was about to tell them it was

the work of his boy, but Johnny is suddenly in a hurry to get away. Whenever others are

around, Johnny tends to drag his father away, because he thinks his father might do

something silly. In like manner, “ Johnny gives him an apprehensive look when he sits

down, and then crowds as far away from him as he could get…”(p74). Johnny is really

trying to part from his father. Somewhat, he’s giving the illusion that John is not his

father, but a stranger, due to all the things he is doing at the banquet. Regardless of what

John is thinking when he gives the award to Johnny, “the boy [ breaks] away from him

and [runs] back to his chair, his chin lowered on his chest” (p75). Thereupon, Johnny is

embarrassed of his fathers actions, in front of his friends, and their father…everyone!

Additionally, “ the boy [is] sobbing silently, his thin shoulders shuddering beneath his

blazer” (p75). Because of his fathers drunken actions, he does particular things that he

assumes is amusing, but Johnny gets upset, ashamed, and embarrassed by them, causing

him to hate his father. That results in them not talking with each other, and staying

separated. The impact of John’s drunken behaviour towards his son , is full of hatred.

Irresponsibility can cause negativity in life, and it can also harm loved ones,

John’s irresponsibility becomes to be a lack of involvement with his son, creating a

distance, and causing them to spread apart. Apparently, John his son wants to be left

alone: “ He’s a twelve year old boy who wants to be left alone” (p66) he says. However,

John should be aware that father and son bonding time is needed to make their

relationship stronger, but he does not care! Similarly, John thinks, “ Scout meeting! What

do I look like?” (p65) when his wife tells him about the banquet. Generally speaking, a

father would be excited to spend time with their son, but because of John’s

irresponsibility, he does not want to spend the day with his son. As a matter of fact,

Johnny is afraid to ask his father to go with him: “ ‘Well I guess he was afraid you’d say

no,’” (p66) says Johnny’s mother. Johnny assumes his father doesn’t want to go with him,

because he usually doesn’t. Furthermore, John agrees to keep his son in the same grade

for a second year. He is a rock-hearted father. That really impacted Johnny in the way of

how his father views him. In their relationship, “from then on, their distance on from

another was greater than ever” (p65). John didn’t back up his son, and help him with him

frustrations. He did not worry about his son. John never attempts to spend time, and know

his boy.

Knowing one’s interests, and hobbies means, knowing them very well. Due to

John’s irresponsibility of lack of relationship with his son, he doesn’t even know what

Johnny’s hobbies, and interests are. Johnny likes to do many activities, that his father is

not aware of. Johnny loves to go swimming, and even “though [John is] aware that the

boy ha[s] been going two nights a week to a neighbourhood highschool pool, he ha[s]

never thought of him being an exceptional swimmer” (p69). John doesn’t even know why

his son goes to the pool, and if he is even good at swimming, or not. Comparatively,

when John sees Johnny’s art at the banquet, “ he could see the tremendous amount of

work that ha[s] been gone into its carving, and [feels] an immeasurable loss as he

realize[s] he ha[s] not even inquired what the boy [is] doing…” (p71) John does not

attempt to be a responsible father, and know what projects his son is doing, so he can help

him. Additionally, he does not even know his sons good at art. Moreover, when it comes

to John trying to have a simple conversation with his son, he couldn’t think of anything to

talk about that wouldn’t sound wooden, and contrived. Then, he realizes, “he [doesn’t]

even know what position is son plays, or even the name of the team” (p66). Only if he

takes part in his son’s life. Then he could know every single detail about him. Johnny’s

like a stranger to him. His own son, a stranger… John thinks that” he seem[s] to know

less about the boy than anyone” *(p68). John doesn’t take part in his sons life. He doesn’t

even take the time to get to know Johnny. John couldn’t even handle his general

responsibilities, leaving him to know nothing about his son.

A father has many sides to him, in which taking a side off, he’s not a caring parent

after all. John is completely responsible for the failure of his relationship with his son,

Johnny, due to his selfishness, drunken behaviour, and general irresponsibility, in raising

his son. John always cares about his status, and for him not to look bad in front of other,

resulting in him not caring about anyone else but himself. His selfishness leads Johnny to

be afraid of his father. Second, John’s drunken behaviour leads to inappropriate, and

embarrassing actions, which severely impacts his son, emotionally. Lastly, John’s general

irresponsibility of lack of involvement with his son resulting in, him not to know

anything about his son, Johnny. Their relationship became into a barrier, causing them to

spread apart. As can be seen, John was completely at fault, for the failure of relationship

with his son, Johnny.

Sharan Chana May 2, 2013 Block 4 Option 1