A Midsummer Night's Dream: Modern Adaptation

A MIDSUMMER NIGHT’S DREAM

Narrator: Do you believe in magic? Do you believe in fairies? These two things may sound ridiculous to you, but they both take a great part in the story you are about to see. The story took place once on a midsummer night. It is about four American lovers who are willing to go through everything, including enchanted forests, for the sake of love. Hermione loves Ron and Ron loves Hermione. What could be better than that? Ginny loves Harry, but Harry does not love Ginny. What could be worse than that? The course of true love never did run smooth. Open your eyes and be sure not to miss any detail in this story. Let us all discover these lovers’ quest for true love.

Snape: Now now, Hermione, don’t be a baby. My decision is final.

Hermione: Don’t be a baby? Ha! You are the one who is being a baby, papa. You are threatening to take away my inheritance just to force me to break up with Ron and be with Harry. How childish can you be?

Snape: [Angrily]. Hermione Granger! How dare you speak to me that way?! Is that how you repay me for raising you up and providing your needs and your desires—answering me like I am one of your playmates? I will teach you your lesson. You are grounded for a month—which means no Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, cellphone, no going to malls with Ginny, and definitely no Ron Weasley!

Hermione: (Gasps). Grounded? Like, seriously? Oh, papa, I’m sure we can talk about this.

Snape: No. I will accept no protests coming from you. Now, give me your cellphone. I am going to confiscate it.

Hermione: (Innocent face). Uhm. I kinda misplaced it. I’ll go looking for it later then I will hand it over to you as soon as I find it.

(Snape exits)
(Hermione brings out her mobile phone)

Hermione: (Readling aloud). Hey. Still up? I just want you to know that I’m grounded. Huhuhu.

Ron: What?! Grounded?

(Ron calls Hermione)

Hermione: Hello?

Ron: What happened, babe? Why are you grounded?

Hermione: Papa forces me to be with Harry. I can’t do it, Ron. You know how much I love you, babe. I can’t just give up on our relationship and be with someone else.

Ron: Don’t you worry, dear. You will never have to date Harry as long as I am here.

Hermione: (Confused). Really? How are we supposed to do that? I’m grounded, remember?

Ron: You will sneak out tomorrow night when is fast asleep. You have to be sure he is asleep before you leave. Go to the forest where we used to have picnic and celebrate May Day with Helena. We will visit my aunt who lives in New York.

Hermione: I’ll be coming, Ron. Just wait for me there.

(At school)

Hermione: Ginny! I have something to tell you!

Ginny: What is it? I heard you’re grounded. I am sorry for you, Hermione. But why do you seem so excited when you are grounded? Aren’t you supposed to be mourning over your lost freedom?

Hermione: Who cares if I’m grounded? I’ll be forever free after this day.

Ginny: Free? Forever? How?

Hermione: I’m running away with Ron tonight!

Ginny: What? Running away? With my brother? As in “eloping?”

Hermione: Yes. I’ll meet him tonight in the forest where we used to celebrate May Day. Harry Styles will be all yours, Helena.

(Hermione exits)

Ginny: Harry will be all mine? Oh really, Hermione? Harry adores her but he despises me. He used to love me, at least before she came around. Oh, don’t worry, Ginny. Payback time is near. It is very near. I will tell Harry of their plan. He will surely go after Hermione. Having him acknowledge my effort is worth all the pain I’ve been through since he dumped me for that girl.

(Ginny exits)

Narrator: All could have been well if Hermione was not too excited to run away with Ron that she spilled the beans to Ginny. Now what? Of course Harry will go after Hermione and Ginny will go after Harry. Will Harry get Hermione, or will Ginny make him fall in love with her?

(In the forest)

Hermione: Ron!

Ron: Hermione! You came!

Hermione: This is really great! Who would have thought that running away would be fun! (Both giggle).

(Hermione and Ron exit)
(Ginny and Harry enter)

Ginny: This is the place, Harry. Hermione told me she would meet Lysander in this forest.

Harry: Thank you. You may go home now, Ginny. I will find those two rascals.

(Ginny grabs Harry’s hand)

Ginny: No! I am not leaving! I’ll go with you.

Harry: Whatever, just be sure to behave properly.

(Ginny and Harry exit)
(Peeta, Katniss, and Prim enter)

Prim: (Crying) I’m so sorry, Papa.

Peeta: You stubborn child! Look at what you’ve done! Come here, you filthy rat!

Katniss: How dare you speak to her that way! Prim already apologized to you. Can’t you just accept your daughter’s apology?

Peeta: Ha! An apology cannot fix a broken wand. That wand is the most powerful one here in this kingdom. It will take months for the best wand maker to replace this. Besides, she is not my daughter!

Katniss: Shh. Peeta! Quit saying that thing.

Prim: I am not his daughter?!

Peeta: That’s right, street rat. You are not our daughter. I am not your father and Katniss is not your mother. You are nothing but an orphan! Did you hear me? I said you are an orphan!

Prim: Mama, is that true?

Katniss: I am so sorry, dear.

Prim: All these years I actually thought I have a family, but I was wrong. I never had a family. Are these wings even real? Why can’t I fly with them?

Katniss: No, dear. They aren’t real. A servant just bought them at Toy Kingdom the day Peeta rescued you from a car accident. I am so sorry, Prim. I lied to you because I love you.

Prim: Liar! I will never believe any word that will come out of your mouth!

Katniss: Prim!

(Prim exits while crying)

Katniss: What have you done?

Peeta: You are blaming me?! I told you from the start to tell her the truth while it is not too late.

Katniss: You hurt her feelings!

Peeta: I hurt her feelings? You were the one who lied to her! You hurt her feelings!

Katniss: I planned to tell her soon, but you ruined my plan! You are such a disgusting creature, you monster!

(Katniss exits and Puck enters)

Puck: Wow that was pretty tough, boss.

Peeta: I know. I need you to do something for me, Robin.

Puck: What is it, sir?

Peeta: There is certain flower called “love-in-idleness.” It is located in the western part of the world. It was pierced by Cupid’s arrow of love. I need you to get that flower for me. I need it for my prank on my dear Katniss. I will put its juice on her eyelids to make her fall madly in love with the next creature she sees, be it a human or a beast. Bring it to me as fast as you can.

Puck: As you wish, sir. Have you ever watched the movie, “Around the World in 80 Days?” I can do it in forty minutes.

(Puck exits)

Peeta: Katniss will pay for choosing that orphan over me. That adopted daughter of hers would be dead by now if not for me. Wait, I think some people are coming. I better hide and listen to their conversation.

(Harry and Ginny enter)

Harry: Stop following me! I cannot love you! I am in love with Hermione.

Ginny: How can I stop following you? I am like steel attracted to a cruel magnet like you! If you let go of your power to attract me, then I will stop following you.

Harry: Did I ask you to follow me? Who told you to love me? I have never been kind to you. I have always told you that I cannot love you. I made that clear to you. Duh. I did my best to push you away.

Ginny: Pushing me away just draws me closer to you. I am like a dog and you are my master. The more you beat me, the more I love you. Let me follow you, Harry. Let me follow behind you just as a dog follows his master. I consider it an honor to be your dog.

Harry: Eew. Aren’t ladies supposed to be the ones chased after? You’re like a maniac. You are worse than a whore. I will never stop running away from you and hiding from you.

(Harry and Ginny exit)

Peeta: Yes, young maiden, the story shall be changed. Before you leave this forest, he shall go after you and you shall run away from him.

(Puck enters)

Peeta: Do you have it?

Puck: Yes, here it is, sir.

Peeta: Give it to me. (He takes the flower). I will put the juice of this flower on Katniss’ eyes and fill her with horrible desires. (He gives Puck part of the flower). You have to take some of it too. There is a young American lady pursuing a lad who wants nothing to do with her. I want you to squeeze this flower’s juice on the young man’s eyes and make him fall in love with her.

Puck: I am at your service, sir.

(Puck and Peeta exit)

Narrator: “Love-in-idleness.” Will the juice of this flower awaken Harry’s idle love for Ginny? Or will it just worsen his hatred for her? Oh Puck, be careful with whatever Peeta told you to do with that flower. Will Peeta’s prank work on Katniss? Or will he have pity on her and choose not to do the trick instead?

(Narrator exits)
(Katniss and servants enter)

Katniss: Let’s play some music, dear fairies. Switch on the CD player and let it play a lullaby.

(Kiss the Rain by Yiruma plays)
(Katniss falls asleep)
(Servants exit)
(Peeta enters)

Peeta: (He queezes the juice on Katniss’ eyelids). The first creature you see when you wake up will be the one that you love. Wake up when something undesirable is nearby.

(Peeta exits)
(Ron and Hermione enter)

Ron: Babe, I think we’re lost. Do you mind if we rest for a while? You seem pretty exhausted anyway. Let us continue our journey in the morning.

(Ron and Hermione fall asleep)
(Puck enters)

Puck: This must be him. This must be the American boy that Peeta is talking about. Oh, look at this poor girl! What a pity that this pretty lady sleeps with such horrible creature! (He squeezes the flower juice on Ron’s eyelids). You jerk!

(Puck exits)
(Ginny chases after Harry)

Ginny: Harry, stop! Wait for me!

Harry: Get out of my sight!

Ginny: No! Don’t leave me alone in the dark! Harry, please stop! Harry!

(Harry exits)

Ginny: (Crying). Oh, look at me. I am nothing compared to Hermione. There is no doubt Harry is running away from me. How foolish of me to think I can be as fair as beautiful Hermione. I have never even won a beauty pageant. No, I have never even won 2nd or 3rd prize. She always wins first prize. I am such a loser. (She sees Ron). Ron? Why is Ron lying on the ground? Is he dead? Ron, if you’re alive, please open your eyes.

Ron: (He wakes up). Oh, there you are, my beautiful Ginny. Will you be my girlfriend?

Ginny: (Shoked). Ron? What’s gotten into you? I am your sister! Besides, you already have a girlfriend. There she is, lying on the ground. She is the only beautiful woman in your eyes

Ron: (Laughs). Ha! Are you kidding? Hermione? The only beautiful woman in my eyes? I regret all the time I spent with her. You are not my real sister, Ginny. I am adopted, remember? Oh, it seems I just woke up from a terrible nightmare. I will break up with her and court you instead. Ginny: Why does everybody love to make fun of me? Ron, is it not enough for you that I never got a kind look from Harry? How can you do this to your sister?

Ron: I told you Ginny Weasley, I am not your real brother.

Ginny: Whatever.

(Ginny exits)

Ron: Hermione, keep sleeping. I’ve had enough of you. From now on, I will spend every second I have trying to please Ginny.

(Ron exits)
(Narrator enters)

Narrator: Oh Puck, what have you done? I thought you were Robin GOODfellow. This trouble you have caused didn’t make you a good fellow. Perhaps you should be called Robin NAUGHTYfellow from now on. Dear friends, the fairies’ helping hands didn’t turn out to be helpful at all. Will they be able to solve this problem they have caused? Let’s see.

(Narrator exits)

Hermione: (Wakes up). Ron, you wouldn’t believe what I have dreamed abou—Ron? Where is Ron? Where did he go?

(Hermione exits)
(Diana sleeps onstage)
(Gale Hawthorne, Cato, Haymitch Abernathy, Seneca Crane, Caesar Flickerman and Finnick Odair enter)

Cato: Dude, are you sure this is a good idea?

Gale: Come on, man, don’t tell me you want to quit and go home to momma? (All laugh) Show us how tough you are, Cato baby

Cato: Pipe down, Hawthorne. I don’t need to prove how tough I am. I just want to be safe. Look, guys, this forest is believed to be housed with fairies and other creatures. Can’t we go camping somewhere else?

Gale: (Laughs) Cato believes in fairytales! (Everybody laughs)

Finnick: Do you want me to read you a bedtime story, Cato? I have a story about a little boy who lost a battle and was fed to hungry dogs. (Laughter)

Seneca: I’ll sing you a lullaby before to get you to sleep!

Haymitch: (Pretends to fly) Look at me! I’m a fairy! I’ll cast a spell on you, Cato! You will die of hunger! (Laughter)

Caesar: Oh look, a ghost! The ghost will get you, Cato! Gale: That’s enough, guys. Our Cato Baby is going to cry! (Laughter)

(Everybody bursts into laughter)
(Everybody except Gale falls asleep)
(Puck enters)

Puck: Poor Cato. You became the object of laughter to your friends. As for this lad who calls himself Gale Hawthorne, he is so arrogant. (He turns to Gale). You need to learn you lesson, Hawthorne. (He makes Gale’s nose as long as a meter stick).

(Puck exits)
(Gale wanders in the forest)

Gale: (He sees Katniss sleeping and walks towards her). O-M-G! Fairies are real! Cato Baby is telling the truth!

Katniss: (Wakes up). Who is this angel who wakes me up from my beauty sleep?

Gale: I am Gale Hawthorne.

Katniss: Oh, you are such a wonderful creature. You will stay here with me. I will turn you into a spirit. You must forget your human life. Start a new life with me, Gale Hawthorne.

Gale: What? No way! I will never live in this forest with you!

Katniss: (Grabs Gale’s arm). Oh yes, you will.

(They both exit)
(Peeta enters)

Peeta: I wonder if Katniss is awake yet. What kind of beast has she fallen in love with?

(Puck enters)

Peeta: Ah, Robin! There you are my trusted messenger. What news have you got for me?

Puck: Katniss, your wife, is in love with Pinocchio! While she was sleeping, a group of campers came into the forest. That arrogant Gale Hawthorne was one of them. I made his nose as long as a meter stick. Katniss woke up and fell deeply in love with him. (They both laugh).

Peeta: Our plan is going better than I thought. What about the American lovers?

(Harry and Hermione enter)

Peeta: (Speaking to Puck). They are coming.

Puck: (Speaking to Peeta). That is the woman I saw! But I have never seen the man who is with her.

Harry: Why are you so rude to someone who loves you more than his own life?

Hermione: I should treat you worse than this. You have given me enough reason to hate you. Where is Ron? Where did you take him? Did you kill him while he was asleep? If you did, then please kill me too. I cannot live without him.

Harry: Quit saying those things. You’re so corny. I didn’t kill him. I don’t even have a gun with me. Besides, why would I ever hold a gun? As far as I know, Ron is not even dead.

Hermione: Please tell me he is fine.

Harry: What would I get out of telling you he is fine?

Hermione: You will get the privilege of never seeing me again.

Harry: Why would I want that? I want to be with you forever, Hermione.

Hermione: Whatever. Talk to the hand, Harry.

(Hermione exits)

Harry: I cannot go after her when she is in a rage. Perhaps it is better if I lie down and take a nap for a little while. (He lies down and falls asleep).

Peeta: (He spanks Puck and speaks to him). What have you done?

Puck: What? What have I done wrong?

Peeta: (Sarcastically). You have done well, Robin. Congratulations. You put the love juice on the wrong guy! (He spanks Puck again). You put the juice on the eyelids of someone who is in love with the right person. You made him fall in love with another girl!

Puck: Well, that’s fate. What do you think, sir? Am I a good match-maker? (He grins).

Peeta: (Angrily). Fate?! Match-maker?! (Grunts). Shut your mouth and find Ginny! I shall squeeze the juice on Harry’s eyelids. Bring Ginny as fast as you can so she will be the first person Harry sees upon opening his eyes.

Puck: (Frightened). Yes, sir. Yes, sir. I will go faster than an arrow from a Tartar’s bow.

(Puck exits)

Peeta: (He squeezes the juice on Harry’s eyelids). When you see the girl you should love, she will seem as bright as the evening star.

(Puck enters)

Puck: Ginny is coming, boss. The other man is chasing her. Oh, these mortals are fools! (He laughs).

(Ron and Ginny enter)

Ron: I am not making fun of you, Ginny. It is not Hermione that I love. It is you. I was out of my mind when I told her I love her.

Ginny: You are out of your mind now, brother.

Ron: No, I’m not. I am not insane and I am not your brother. Let Harry pursue her. He loves Hermione, not you.

Harry: (He wakes up). What are you talking about? It is you who is in love with Hermione. Ginny is mine. Back off, Ron. You cannot fall in love with your sister.

Ron: She is not my real sister!

Ginny: You both shut up! What kind of sick joke is this? Did you two plan this to humiliate me? You are competing for Hermione, not me.

(Hermione enters)

Hermione: There you are, Ron! Why did you leave me alone in the dark?

Ron: I left you in the dark in order to go to my beautiful Ginny. I’m breaking up with you, Hermione.

Hermione: What?! (She turns to Ginny). You slut! How dare you seduce your own brother, you whore!

Ginny: You moron! How dare you speak to me that way! I will never seduce my brother. You are the whore! You already have your Ron and you still stole my Harry, you witch!

Hermione: I stole your Harry? I have never even said any kind word to him!

(The four lovers pause)
(Peeta and Puck take the center stage)

Peeta: This is your entire fault, Robin. You always make mistakes. Or perhaps you did it on purpose? You said yourself you love this kind of situation. We have to fix this mess before the situation gets worse. Make the night darker, Robin. Make it so dark and cloudy that they would be completely lost in the woods and cannot run into each other. Mimic Harry’s voice and lead Ron away from him. Do the same with the other man. Lead them farther and farther away from each other until they get exhausted and fall asleep. When they are asleep, put this antidote on Ron’s eyelids. When the four lovers wake up, everything that happened in this forest will seem like a dream to them. I, on the other hand, will go see Katniss. I will undo my spell on her. I have punished her enough.

(Peeta exits)

Narrator: Puck did as Peeta told him. He led the two guys away from each other. (Puck leads Ron and Harry away from each other). The two girls were separated too. Does this mean the problem is about to be solved? I cannot wait to find out!

(Ron and Harry both lie down)

Ginny: What an exhausting night! Perhaps I should rest for a while. (Ginny lies down near Harry)

Puck: One, two, three... only three? Where is the other one? Ah, there she comes. (He points at Hermione.)

Hermione: I have never been this tired before. I have to take a nap. (Hermione lies down near Ron)

(Puck puts the antidote on Ron’s eyelids)

Puck: I will cure you, gentle lover. I am sorry for this trouble you’ve been through. I am also sorry for calling you a jerk. Sleep well, gentle one. When you wake up, you will be happy to see your true love.

(The four lovers sleep onstage)
(Katniss and Gale enter)

Katniss: Rest, my love. Sit down on this flowery bed.

Gale: Hmm. Cozy. I’d like to get some sleep.

(They both sleep)

Peeta: (He squeezes the juice on Katniss’ eyelids). Be like you used to be and see things as you have seen them before. Wake up, my queen.

Katniss: Peeta! I had a strange dream. I dreamed that I was in love with a long-nosed man!

Peeta: There is your boyfriend, Katniss. (He points to Gale and laughs).

Katniss: Eew! That is the worst nightmare ever!

Peeta: Robin, take that long nose off this human.

Puck: (He takes of the long nose). When you wake up, you will see things with your own foolish eyes.

(The three fairies exit)

Gale: (He wakes up). What happened? Where am I? Where are the other guys? Hey Cato! Haymitch! Ceasar! Crane! Finnick! O-M-G! They left me alone in this forest! I have to go.

(Gale exits)
(The four lovers wake up)

Hermione: Ron! You know what? I had a dream that you weren’t in love with me anymore. I’m so glad to see you by my side. I thought I’d lost you.

Ron: That will never happen, baby. You will always be the apple of my eye.

(Hermione and Ron hug each other)

Ginny: Harry, look! Ron and Hermione are sitting right there! You can now get Hermione back.

Ron: (Laughs) Hermione? Why would I need Hermione? It is you whom I love, not Hermione.

(The four lovers unite)

Narrator: Everything ended well for every character in our story. Hermione and Ron are not just in love with each other, but madly in love. Harry finally found that the right woman for him has been by his side the whole time. Peeta and Katniss vowed not to argue about silly things again. Gale is no longer the braggart he used to be. And Puck? Well, let us say he is enjoying another scene in another part of the world. They say that love is like magic, but magic can sometimes be just an illusion. This silly and pathetic story is no more than an illusion, but love is not.

An Adaptation

III-Peñafrancia

Director: Christine Coleen Canales Scriptwriter: Aila Monica Flores

Props Managers: Cricelle Anne Chua Musical Scorers: Adgerei Corpuz Danica Estrabillo Aubrey San Pedro

Main Characters:
Hermione: Diane Therese Castillo Ron: Patricia Guzman
Ginny: Sophia Veronique Amurao Harry: Aivan Carreon
Katniss: Nicoleen Punzalan Peeta: Elyssa Carpio
Puck: Anna Bianca Velasco Narrator: Lady Gabrielle Nuñez

Minor Characters:
Snape: Christine Coleen Canales Prim: Aila Monica Flores
Cato: Samantha Masangcay Gale: Monia Alexa Montemayor
Haymitch: Adgerei Corpuz Seneca: Cricelle Anne Chua
Caesar: Danica Estrabillo Finnick: Aubrey San Pedro