Attachment Theory and the Impact Adult Romantic Relationships
Attachment Theory and the impact Adult Romantic Relationships
Iksheeta Shah
University of Waterloo
March 23, 2011
My roommate, Breseis, and I get along really well. We are completely opposite in every aspect, but only to complement each other. When I met her, she barely talked and never shared any of her stories or her past. She only started trusting me when I trusted her with my problems. She was always uncomfortable talking about her life with others. However, she slowly let herself lose around me over time and now we share a very close bond. Her first step towards trusting me was when she woke me up at 3:00am on a Wednesday night because she was stressed about what her boyfriend said. Very recently, she told me that it took her a lot of trust and faith to wake me up because she was unsure of how I would react. I saw her through her first relationship and was with her in each phase she went through. Her relationship lasted for a little over a month. She never wanted to announce her relationship on Facebook or tell people. Being an extremely open person, I was shocked at why she would not want to share her happiness with people. Her response to that was that “I don’t want to be a topic talked about”.
Her first relationship was rather complicated as her boyfriend was still really good friends with his ex which made Breseis feel insecure. Several weeks prior to the relationship being official she was already very attached to Vivek and the relationship as it was her first one. She constantly wanted and required more attention from Vivek. When she failed to receive such attention and warmth, she immediately tried to de-attach herself from him as a defense mechanism. Through her whole relationship she never believed that he could like her. I always had to convince her by pointing back at all his actions to prove that he does, in fact, like her. It was hard to convince her that he liked her.
A month later they broke up because she was unhappy and always
Iksheeta Shah
University of Waterloo
March 23, 2011
My roommate, Breseis, and I get along really well. We are completely opposite in every aspect, but only to complement each other. When I met her, she barely talked and never shared any of her stories or her past. She only started trusting me when I trusted her with my problems. She was always uncomfortable talking about her life with others. However, she slowly let herself lose around me over time and now we share a very close bond. Her first step towards trusting me was when she woke me up at 3:00am on a Wednesday night because she was stressed about what her boyfriend said. Very recently, she told me that it took her a lot of trust and faith to wake me up because she was unsure of how I would react. I saw her through her first relationship and was with her in each phase she went through. Her relationship lasted for a little over a month. She never wanted to announce her relationship on Facebook or tell people. Being an extremely open person, I was shocked at why she would not want to share her happiness with people. Her response to that was that “I don’t want to be a topic talked about”.
Her first relationship was rather complicated as her boyfriend was still really good friends with his ex which made Breseis feel insecure. Several weeks prior to the relationship being official she was already very attached to Vivek and the relationship as it was her first one. She constantly wanted and required more attention from Vivek. When she failed to receive such attention and warmth, she immediately tried to de-attach herself from him as a defense mechanism. Through her whole relationship she never believed that he could like her. I always had to convince her by pointing back at all his actions to prove that he does, in fact, like her. It was hard to convince her that he liked her.
A month later they broke up because she was unhappy and always