RECOUNT
SOMEHING BEYOND WORDS It was a cold day but I was warm. It was one of those days in the early December when people start to fall in love with the cool breeze of winters. Even though I was warm, I wanted to experience the chill outside. But, I didn’t know whether I was ready for it. I gave her a timid kick with my tiny toe to let her know that it was time that I came out. I felt like a little seed ready to break through and sprout. I was in a situation where I was standing on the edge of the cliff and felt like jumping off and I would have never known how it felt until I actually jumped. So I did. 10th of December 1995 was the day I came into this world. I felt vulnerable. The wind was chilly and the temperature kept fluctuating. I wasn’t enclosed by the protective shield anymore. I felt like a caged bird let free. I remember I was wincing and trying to tell everyone that I was blinded by the lights, but I did not have the wings of words to do so. So, I just felt helpless. Then, I gradually opened my eyes for the first time and I was enchanted by the sight. The experience was similar to how a blind man would feel when he first opened his eyes. I saw colours; red, green, blue, yellow and all the others. The first thing I remember seeing was a beautiful creature. She looked at me with eyes full of questions. That creature is now who I know as my mother. We both wanted to talk to each other but couldn’t, as we did not share the same language. Yet, our souls were connected and we were communicating. It was a conversation without words. Rather, it was a conversation that can’t be explained in words. I still remember how it overwhelmed me. It filled up my heart like there was nothing else that I ever wanted. That conversation helped me recognise her smell, her touch and the way she held me. It helped me sense her and know who she is. Then, a foreign hand touched me. He held me in his arms so gently as if I