children's devices. Coben reveals his position by frequently using a counter argument and plenty of anecdotes, to develop and support the thesis. Although Coben has many reasonable thoughts about using spyware, parents should only implement it if the basis of trust is broken between parent and child.
Spyware should not be installed on children’s devices by parents.
The parent and child relationship on this matter should just include trust. Using spyware on children’s devices without consent breaks the bond of trust between the parent and the child. If a child and the parent have trust in each other and don’t lie to one another, spyware is not needed. However, if the child constantly lies and breaks trust it can be seen why some parents see monitoring as an option for watching their kid online. “The ability to experience privacy is probably a basic human need that transcends culture,” says Skyler Hawk, a social psychologist who studies adolescent development at the Chinese University of Hong Kong. “During adolescence, kids’ brains, bodies, and social lives are changing rapidly. As they experiment with their identities and self-expression, they need space to figure it all out” Hawk says. Children should be allowed the right to privacy with a few guidelines. For example, if a parent and a child has a strong bond of trust and is true, then spyware would not be needed for the devices. However, if the child breaks that trust, the decision may need to be put into consideration. What Hawk is conveying is that if a child needs so much room to grow from mistakes and learn lessons, that with parents spying, the trust may be gone in a blink of an
eye.
In John Keilman Essay, “Spymaster parents might uncover trust problems” (2014), he conveys that although spyware can be extremely useful to parents around the world, it can have many consequences behind it. When talking about installing spyware on teens devices, he explains the consequences that the parent must face. He says, “If you spy on them and discover something, then what? The very first question a teenager will have is, 'How did you know that?' The problem with that is that trust just breaks down between parent and child. Without trust and mutual respect, things get a lot more difficult.” Before spyware is used, the parent has to weigh the benefits and consequences of it all… Is monitoring my child potentially more important than losing a very strong bond of trust? Children need to trust the parents as much as the parent trusts the child. Parents have to think critically about the topic, and if spyware is even necessary when there's already trust. So, spyware should only be used if the bond of trust is broken by the child for any reason.
Spyware is not absolutely needed for parents to monitor or spy on their kid(s). However, some argue that parental spyware is a complete necessity. There are a staggering number of benefits to spyware for parents. With the help of Parental monitoring software, one can easily block websites that have inappropriate content. The Parental monitoring software also provides a track record of data and history online. With this information, parents can take appropriate actions when required. According to Coben’s essay, “there is a fine line between being responsibly protective and irresponsibly nosy.” With this, parents shouldn't spy on their kids just for fun or to find information that is not necessarily important. It should be for purposes that are fully backed up, or just to make sure that safety is first in every situation regarding the internet. Despite the monitoring aspects, the majority of teens will back up and fight for the right to privacy. In addition, it is a battle of two sides that may not agree, the child and the parent. No matter what, a parent always wants what's the safest option for their child. In the given situation, the question is… how necessary is this for something that will always be there. The internet will exist no matter the security measures put on for children’s devices.
Websites and technology are changing incredibly on daily basis, so it’s impossible to have 100% protection by Parental monitoring software for your child. There are so many different ways to parent, but all parenting should consist of the child feeling safe. Technology in this day and age is unavoidable, it is a part of the culture in today’s society. Trust and loyalty play a great role is the raising of a child, it's up to the parent if they want that trust and loyalty returned. Whether you use parental monitoring or not you must know about the potential threat and how these parental controls can help you. If the parent has confidence in the raising of their child spyware is not needed. So, in conclusion, parents should not need spyware to monitor their kids. It should all depend on whether or not the kids were taught the dangers of the internet and how to avoid them. After all, kids going on the internet is inevitable with the rate that technology is advancing/changing it.