Harlan Coben The Undercover Parent

To Spy or not to Spy…That is the Question!

In his essay from the New York Times, “The Undercover Parent,” Harlan Coben argues that parental use of spyware to monitor a child’s activities on the computer. The essay begins with Coben showing his initial apprehension towards the use of spyware stating, it’s an “invasion of privacy.” Coben mentions that his, as well as many other parents, hesitation may have started from the word: spyware. Nevertheless, as the essay continues on Coben’s views, on the subject, change. He says that some parents overprotect their children and might abuse the spyware programs, but most parents just want to use them to oversee their child’s activities and make sure they are doing the right thing and not getting themselves into trouble. Coben points out that it will be a hard choice to make and your child might be mad at you for “spying” on them, but in the end you’re just trying to do the best thing and you just want to protect them.
Coben explains his
initial apprehensions with the word “spyware” by saying its secretive yet hints to being very intrusive of privacy. The word is kind of scary and has a harsh tone. Coben adds to this harsh tone by using words such as “repelled” or “invasion” to describe his initial feelings. After showing his readers he can relate to how they feel he tries to show his readers that the programs are actually quite simple and not as cruel or invasive. Coben hints at the point that since you’re a parent trying to protect and supervise your child’s activities it’s being used for a good reason which makes this ok. He states that parents already watch over their child in their home environment and school, so this is just another way to watch over something the parent might not be able to see in plain view. Coben does a good job of showing ways that people might disagree with him and then makes positive points to refute the negatives. When he says he was “first repelled at this invasion of privacy” he shows his understanding of how people could disagree with spyware use by parents, but he explain the process of thinking he went through that made him change his view on the issue which helps his readers to understand his reasoning for accepting of spyware use.
Coben makes sure to state what the opposing views are; this shows that he is open to discussion and willing to discuss the issue.
But he also refutes these views to make his point and help his readers to understand how he became to agree with the use of spyware by parents. A good instance of this is when Coben talks about parents abusing the programs to overprotect their children he uses it as a way to show that parents will “fight their kids’ battles,” but when it comes to their privacy they don’t want to intrude even if the child could be getting themselves into a difficult situation. This is a good rebuttal because it’s showing that these parents are being two-sided by wanting to protect their child when in public from such thing as playground bullying or tough coaches, but these parents also wanting to give their child privacy when they could really be getting themselves into trouble on the computer and internet where they could be talking to a sexual predator and not even know
it.
Coben uses descriptive examples of situations where spyware may have helped protect a child from harm or danger. He states examples such as stories of a young boy who was unknowingly conversing with a pedophile or the girl who was cyber bullied to the point where she committed suicide. He asks the question, “would a watchful eye have helped?” It makes the reader think about whether or not these programs could really help protect the children from harm and danger that they might unsuspectingly be putting themselves in because they don’t think someone would hurt them.
Overall, Coben did a great job of covering all the points to the issue whether they were for or against it. He makes sure to emphasize his view on the issue and shows ways that the opposing views can be made positive and agrees with the issue. I don’t think Coben left anything out of his argument, he made sure to consider everything when describing the issue and ways people could view it. My personal opinion is that Coben makes a complete argument and does a great job trying to persuade people to agree with his view on the issue. While a child’s privacy is significant I would have to say that a child’s safety is even more important; and if I was a parent I would use spyware to keep tabs on my child’s activities on the computer.