Misconceptions About Women

Women have been oppressed for centuries; this is a well known fact. We are constantly suffering through assumptions and stereotypes. As a woman, it’s difficult sometimes to consider how men may feel as well. The truth is, men go through the same thing as us. The stereotypes, the verbal stabs at things we can’t control, all of it. Men and women both have everyday struggles simply because of their gender. This has never been a one-sided battle. That is the most common misconception about this issue that has been going on for so long between men and women. We see it as one sided because we see it from the eyes of the sex that we are instead of putting ourselves in the opposite gender’s shoes. The reality is that we’re fighting the same contention;
therefore we might as well fight it together. “God, why are women always so emotional?” “You’re probably just on your period, that’s why you’re upset.” My genuine feelings and concerns are constantly discredited because I am a woman.
Even if it is unintentional, it’s always a thought in the back of someone’s mind that a girl is probably just on her period or overreacting instead of being seriously upset about something. I’ve always felt like I’m not taken seriously because I’m a female and it’s “funny” or “cute” when I feel passionately about something. In the article There is No Unmarked Woman, Deborah Tannen only reiterates the concept that women are always scrutinized for something. “As I amused myself finding coherence in these styles, I suddenly wondered why I was scrutinizing only the women. I scanned the eight men at the table. And then I knew why I wasn't studying them. The men's styles were unmarked.” A very good example of what Tannen is talking about, is some presidential candidates right now. Not once has anybody analyzed what one of the male candidates chose to wear to a rally or a debate; however, I have heard many people criticizing Hillary Clinton for her pantsuits. This may not be conscious or intentional, but people tend to judge women for what they choose to wear and how revealing it is. Men have never had to worry about something as superficial as
this.

Men, on the other hand, have other stereotypes and ridicule to deal with. Manliness is simply a very fragile cover for the ideals that have been pressed into young boys’ minds for tons of years. In Being a Man by Paul Theroux, he discusses the weak concept of masculinity. “I have always disliked being a man. The whole idea of manhood in America is pitiful, in my opinion. This version of masculinity is a little like having to wear an ill-fitting coat for one's entire life.” Theroux is a man that is aware of the society in which men are put into from birth simply because they are male. Men are expected to never cry, never back down from a fight, and never show much emotion. This makes it so hard for young men everywhere. They are told that their feelings don’t matter and that they simply need to suck it up and “be a man”. After having a discussion in class about gender roles, it became very apparent to me that even my generation feels this way. Many boys in my class said they would never wear a purse or hit a woman because they are a man. I don’t mean to say men should be hitting women, but they shouldn’t feel scared to hit back simply because it was a woman that hit them. Over 40% of domestic abuse victims are men and that’s ONLY the men that have reported it. Who knows how many males are suffering from abuse right now because their complaints of domestic and/or sexual abuse aren’t taken seriously? Yes, feminists exist and are very popular in our culture today. This may cause confusion as to why women still face inequality. It’s because there’s meninists that fight back. This isn’t being stated to just blame the boys, however. The problem with gender and breaking these stereotypes is that there’s always a boys vs. girls team in phys ed, or always a woman being seen as helpless just because she’s a woman, or always a man scared to tell someone about a woman raping him because he’ll just be told that’s not rape. Until men and women aren’t being pitted against each other, the oppression of both sexes will go on. Until we are willing to understand the opposite gender and acknowledge the other’s problems, feminists and meninists will continue trying to prove the other wrong. The problem with gender in society is that when a man is ignorant to a woman, a common response is to be ignorant right back. “And this is also why men often object to feminism but are afraid to explain why: of course women have a justified grievance, but most men believe—and with reason—that their lives are just as bad.”

In conclusion, it’s wrong to assume one gender has it worse than the other. The truth is, we both have it pretty bad. and we are also the only ones that can stop this. The next time a man makes a snarky comment about your driving, or the next time a woman hits you and laughs because you can’t hit back, try to understand it’s just the insecurities that they have been brought up to believe. We must work with each other to finally achieve equality.