Mr. Schmidt
Honors English 11
Satire
Nicki Minaj: Time Magazine’s Most Influential Person Current popular rappers and singers have often been criticized for the lack of substance in their lyrics and their absence of talent; it’s often been said that they have a bad influence on the teenagers who listen to their music. Nicki Minaj, a favorite in pop music today, has finally broken the chain of bad influences and auto tuned nonsense. She has been named Time Magazine’s Most Influential person of all time, surpassing such greats as Barack Obama and Pope Francis. “Finally a role model that my kids can look up to,” Dianne Collins, mother of two teenagers, stated when asked about this development. “Nicki has always been there for me,” Ryan Collins, son of Dianne, explained. “Her music speaks volumes to me. When Pink Friday finally dropped, I listened to it on repeat for 4 hours… It made me cry.” After this, Ryan became very emotional when recalling all of the life lessons that Ms. Minaj has taught him in his fourteen years of life. “Nicki Minaj taught me how to love,” he recalled, wiping a tear from his eye, “I mean, in ‘Your Love’ the relationship she talks about is perfect: ‘Anyway I think I met him in the sky, when I was a Geisha he was a Samurai, somehow I understood him when he spoke Thai.’ It’s just so deep and though out.” Several teenagers, on a Nicki Minaj message board, have credited Nicki as being the modern day Shakespeare, with her own classics such as “Stupid Hoe” and “I’m The Best” paralleled to Shakespeare’s far less superior “Macbeth” and “Romeo and Juliet.” One user, nickisuperfan14xo, discussed with other fans about Nicki’s literary intelligence: “Idk how she comes up with this stuff,” nickisuperfan14xo wrote, “’Hang it up, flatscreen …plasma…hey Nicki, hey Nicki…asthma.’ That is true literary genius. The Great Gatsby has nothing on Nicki Minaj. Most talented writer of all time.” Other users agreed with nickisuperfan14xo, and some